Need to check my thinking...

 Thanks for doing the thinking for me. You have some great tips I hadn't thought of. I have never tried to cook asparagus that way. I've always steamed or baked it. I will definitely try this.

My husband found that way of doing it... I told him "I want asparagus" so... He went online and found a Vegan cooking site. Honest to goodness... They do know how to make veggies tasty!

And... You're welcome! LOL! I just figure it never hurts to share info.

Kerry, I think if you want a piece of pie for thanksgiving then you should put that in your food plan for the day and build your other meals around that and also have your exercise coincide. No need to feel guilty about something that you planned for !

However the "sometimes I just want a cupcake" might be another thing. If it is spur of the moment, and you eat it how will you feel later. I am not sure that those of us who are food addicts can ever just "eat normally".

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving.

No, I cannot have just one cookie, so I do not bring it into the house.  No I cannot have just one taste of something if the whole container is there.  Things start calling my name from the cupboard/refrigerator if they are at home.

So my strategy, is if I am out somewhere and someone else is having a treat, I ask if I can have a bite.  I enjoy the bite of it and I am DONE.

This Thanksgiving, I am hosting the family dinner.  My nephew`s wife will be bringing dessert.  Not sure yet what she is making.  I am planning on having a taste of my daughter`s portion.  Any leftover dessert will be packed up and sent home with others.  The leftover turkey, meatballs and veggies will be portioned and placed in my fridge or freezer.  Those leftovers I will enjoy over the coming week :)

Good luck with figuring out a strategy that will work for you.

Judy

I think figuring out the answer to this question is as individual as the journey we are on.  It completely depends on your trigger foods, your self-control and your determination. What may be a problem for one of us may not be such a big problem for others.

I am not a big sweet eater. My main issue is portion control, so I'm vigilant that my portions continue to remain small.  I have the odd treat now that I'm maintaining. I weigh myself everyday or so and make sure that I'm still within my 5 lb range.

I have a husband and an eighteen year old son, so I don't have the luxury of not having chips, icecream and cookies in the house. I just don't eat them or if I do I have a couple of chips and leave it at that.

I also have a low tolerance of sugars, so it's easy to avoid the sweets. I also subscribe to the sliver size piece or a bite of someone else dessert if I feel so inclined.

I think the 80/20 rule is good if you can manage to stay within your goal range with that formula. If you can't then adjust it until you can.  Maintenance won't be the same formula for everyone just as maximizing your weight loss isn't the same calories to exercise formula for everyone.

It sounds to me like you have your head on straight. My advice is stay vigilant and be wary of your own triggers.  Good luck.

Kerry! I could have written this post!! It is something I struggle with as well, and I wonder if I will be ever be able to be at peace with my eating. I have indulged, somewhat, without using my newfound CBT, and have been able to work it of via exercise. However, at only 18 months out, I wonder how much longer that will remain the case. This week I worked out 5 days, and I'm planning on tomorrow and Monday as well. I am planning on having a small serving of dessert. With that said, sweet is not my trigger. Potato chips are. I do not eat them. That is my slippery slope and it may not make me obese again by having a few, but it just might if I keep extending the few. KWIM?

I use this forum as part of my CBT as well. You are doing wonderfully and just posting this is the best step!! Thanks for the post! I needed to read it.

Thank you everyone for your input.  Sometimes I get stuck in my own head and I just need to say things out loud and listen to the feedback.  I appreciate the advice & the encouragement. 

Although my reply is days too late, I think we are like alcoholics and there will never be such a thing as normal eating for us.

That said, I did have a small piece of pumpkin pie on the weekend at a Thanksgiving dinner, and I did have one chocolate chip cookie that my boyfriend had home-made from scratch.

Hi Kerry

Well here is another late reply....but I think this is an important subject

I agree with Nata for the most part.......80 - 90% of the time I avoid all treats/alcohol etc like the plague.......I dont keep them in the house.....I dont have one bite.....

Sometimes I will begin to eat one of my "forbidden" foods and get out of control....I still have that in me....always will...it scares the bejesus out of me

The first 2 years post op.....treats in moderation likely wont show on the scale....boy does that change....and I allowed myself to gain before I got myself in check again.....it happens fast and its so easy.....and I was having so much fun

SO......what to do.....at almost 4 years post op....and I certainly post my eats....I DO have the occasional treat and glass of wine or beer....I plan for it.....but I absolutely dont allow it to get into a regular part of my eating week....thats what cost me the regain -that I I am now trying to lose......and its coming off but I am pissed at myself for getting to this point

Dont become a smarty pants........Your body is pretty astute and it really wants to put some weight back on.....

So....decide what works for you.....I know I want to try and live like a normal person....and YES this means DIETING for the rest of my life....just like my skinny friends....we all watch EVERYTHING that goes in our mouths.....and acknowledge the treats.....and get back on the horse immediately when we have some.....other then holidays, I usually dont have any treat two days in a row.....and I work it into my weekly allotment....

If you cant control the portion....or you are skipping your protein requirement to fit in a treat.....then give your head a shake.....

ALSO......I had NO treats until 90% of my weight was off.....dont get started early.....

Good luck