Dilemma - Long

 Margaret,
 I didn't want to admit I was having wsl but the excitement from those who knew I was doing it was contagious.  I felt people would think it was a lazy way to deal with the weight.   They who do feel this way are ignorant.  Once informed they understood.

I agree with the replies above...  counseling was a must in my program.  You can gain a lot of insight  into the whole procedure... before and after.

Best wishes

Millie

Margaret,

While I agree with the responses above, I don't think it is wrong that you not want people that you don't wish to know, find out you had WLS. I think caution and consideration of this is of value and very personal for all of us. I do understand how some can make one's life miserable. While it would be lovely if all people who find out could become educated and understand why WLS is done, needed, works etc., there are those who are still idiots and are judgmental and ignorant no matter what. I have lived it and have experienced the negative/miserable part about people in my "business."

I do believe, as others have said, that the support groups are good and the idea Ruth had to say to someone you might know or recognize was great.

Just wanted to validate those feelings you are having...it's good to listen to your gut instinct, good to see why you may also be having the feelings you are having besides just gut instinct....

People do seem to respect and honor things that are said in a support group and please know that the bad experience I had was not from knowledge that came from anyone in a support group. Support Group = Good idea, something to look at...

Here's rootin for ya!
Cheryl

Go for the support group, Margaret.  I don't believe you'll be sorry.  You could always talk to the leader and ask her/him to reiterate about what is said in the group and who you meet in the group should be kept confidential.  I'm pretty sure that they would accomodate you in that manner.
Good Luck.
Jan

Jan, that is an excellent idea!
Cheryl

Good idea Jan.  Thanks for the suggestion. Margaret

Thanks Cheryl for validating my feelings and for your support!  Margaret

My surgeon requried attendance at at least one support group.  Everyone signs in and they use those sheets.

My only regret is that I didn't go to more.  Also, the nurses at my surgeon's practice who set up the group start out by saying everything said in the small groups and any personal info shared with the speaker stays there and is confidential.  Those are the rules everyone needs to abide by.  I have been going to meetings most of each month (a major snowstorm and the flu were the only things that kept me away from the 2 I missed).

Having WLS I have come to believe is not a sign of weakness; rather, it is a sign of strength.  We are redoing our bodies and our minds and I believe that it takes a lot of strength and courage to do that.  You have to do what is right for you.

Sylvia