For the first time of this journey, I questioned myself
Debbie, I agree with Margo on the things that she said. We always have to stop and re-evaluate what our reasons are. Most of the times it is because we know that without our life will be shortened and we want to live the best one that we can. I know that I wanted to spend more time with mine and without my chances of that were considerably limited.
I have friends and family that tried to stop me from having it. I know that in their minds it was because they cared...I have absolutely no doubt of that...but then with some I do firmly belief that they were afraid that they would lose a eating buddy too. I know that the ones that showed feared about it no longer really want to have as much time with me as before..and yes, they are overweight.
Relationships and friendships do change..because we change. We look at things differently and we finally realize the things that are truly important to us. We put things more in order of importance for us in our lives. There is nothing wrong with that...it is what "normal" people do.
Look inside of yourself and see what the answers are to your questions...not someone else but YOURS. You are doing this for YOU and not for anyone else. I think you already know the answers but this is a soul searching decision. Remember not only do you have to keep your eye on the prize...but you have to figure out what the prize is and most of all..."To thine own self be true".
Please remember that we are here for you...always and if you have questions or anything you can use us as sounding boards too. Know that I am sending love and hugs to you along with keeping you in my prayers...I know that you will make the decision that is right for YOU.
I have friends and family that tried to stop me from having it. I know that in their minds it was because they cared...I have absolutely no doubt of that...but then with some I do firmly belief that they were afraid that they would lose a eating buddy too. I know that the ones that showed feared about it no longer really want to have as much time with me as before..and yes, they are overweight.
Relationships and friendships do change..because we change. We look at things differently and we finally realize the things that are truly important to us. We put things more in order of importance for us in our lives. There is nothing wrong with that...it is what "normal" people do.
Look inside of yourself and see what the answers are to your questions...not someone else but YOURS. You are doing this for YOU and not for anyone else. I think you already know the answers but this is a soul searching decision. Remember not only do you have to keep your eye on the prize...but you have to figure out what the prize is and most of all..."To thine own self be true".
Please remember that we are here for you...always and if you have questions or anything you can use us as sounding boards too. Know that I am sending love and hugs to you along with keeping you in my prayers...I know that you will make the decision that is right for YOU.
It's not what you gather, but what you scatter
that tells what kind of life you have lived.
For most of us, this is not an elective surgery. For instance, if my son had not had it, his cardiologist said he would not live five years. If I had not had it, I would not have been able to recover from my lung disease as well as I have. If you have life threatening comorbidities, this is not elective, it is necessary for you to sustain a healthy life. You would not belive the crap that I heard about this surgery. I finally quit talking to my sisters about it and only my son and my husband were there when they actually did the surgery. I don't tell too many people about it because I don't want to hear the horror stories or the failure stories. And I certainly don't want to hear how I am going too far. So, if you are obese and you are not living healthy or you have problems that are life threatening or are causing your quality of life to decrease, ask yourself if this is how you want to spend the rest of your life and if it is, don't get it done. But, if you want health and life, then tell your family you appreciate their concern but you are not backing out.
Thanks so much to each of you, Jacki, Pat, Margo, Gail, Ruth, Brenda, and Jean,
Wow, I'm near tears with all of the support here. I truly believe God led me to this surgery. I have prayed along the way and I have gotten my answers. I have had nothing but positive feedback from each consult I have had, including the psychiatrist, which I asked many, many questions of him. After all, I was there for him to approve me, but I also NEEDED to know some things too! I said if it was meant to be, it would be. My surgeon feels I am an excellent candidate and that I will have no problems.
I have only told a very select few about my surgery. My husband, two daughters, neighbor (who is being worked up now for RNY) and then my brother-in-law and sister-in-law to be. I've been educated enough, and I have had the appropriate workups, to know that I am making the best choice.....
I just had my chocolate protein supplement and now I'm off to prepare for the company picnic.
Thank you all from the bottom of my heart. I can't wait to see each of you on the Loser's Bench!!! WOO HOO!
Wow, I'm near tears with all of the support here. I truly believe God led me to this surgery. I have prayed along the way and I have gotten my answers. I have had nothing but positive feedback from each consult I have had, including the psychiatrist, which I asked many, many questions of him. After all, I was there for him to approve me, but I also NEEDED to know some things too! I said if it was meant to be, it would be. My surgeon feels I am an excellent candidate and that I will have no problems.
I have only told a very select few about my surgery. My husband, two daughters, neighbor (who is being worked up now for RNY) and then my brother-in-law and sister-in-law to be. I've been educated enough, and I have had the appropriate workups, to know that I am making the best choice.....
I just had my chocolate protein supplement and now I'm off to prepare for the company picnic.
Thank you all from the bottom of my heart. I can't wait to see each of you on the Loser's Bench!!! WOO HOO!
A lot of times we get recations like that from friends and family because of their fears. Fear of losing you during surgery, fear that you will change after surgery....and in some respects you will. You have gain more confidence and self assurance.
I feel fear talking...if your doing this for your health and to live a longer life, then yes...your doing it for the right reasons. It is very normal to have fears....I think I worry more about people that have no fears.
After surgery for a few days and sometimes a month or so, we ask ourselves, what the heck did I do to myself. But believe me when I say it gets better everyday.
You'll be fine....:)
I feel fear talking...if your doing this for your health and to live a longer life, then yes...your doing it for the right reasons. It is very normal to have fears....I think I worry more about people that have no fears.
After surgery for a few days and sometimes a month or so, we ask ourselves, what the heck did I do to myself. But believe me when I say it gets better everyday.
You'll be fine....:)
Women are angels.
...and when someone breaks our wings, we simply continue to fly...on a broomstick.
We are flexible.
Darlene
...and when someone breaks our wings, we simply continue to fly...on a broomstick.
We are flexible.
Darlene
Debbie,
I truly do not believe I would be alive today had I not had RNY in 2005. I was 377 lbs and getting heavier by the day. I had given up. I couldn't, wouldn't diet anymore. I was just going to have to be fat. I couldn't go anywhere, do anything that I wanted to. Life was not worth living. I was absolutely miserable.
I was so sure that WLS was what I needed to do. I know my family members had fears and I appreciated their love and concern but it was ultimately my decision. And I'm so glad that I made it.
Best wishes to you. Your day is getting close. I felt better the day after I had surgery than I did the day before. That is no exaggeration. Within a few weeks I would have not known I had had major surgery except for the pounds falling off, and very little desire for foods that I formerly craved. Do stay positive and busy. Your day is almost here.
Karen C
Debbie, you have to make this decision for yourself. I have 2 family members in the medical field, & I didn't tell either one. My niece is an MD & she is totally against it. Has never said a word about my weight loss. She is one who could use it. Her sister is in her 30's & has high blood pressure & already has had surgery on her knees or feet.
My sister-in-law is a RN & after I had it & told her she said if she knew ahead of time she would have talked me out of it. After seeing how it worked for me she is asking questions about it for her husband. He had to medically retire for heart desease & high blood pressure. After he quit smoking he put on a lot of weight!! He was big to begin with too.
Just ask yourself if you are better off with or without this surgery! Good luck & swinging chickens, & saying prayers for you.
Nan
My sister-in-law is a RN & after I had it & told her she said if she knew ahead of time she would have talked me out of it. After seeing how it worked for me she is asking questions about it for her husband. He had to medically retire for heart desease & high blood pressure. After he quit smoking he put on a lot of weight!! He was big to begin with too.
Just ask yourself if you are better off with or without this surgery! Good luck & swinging chickens, & saying prayers for you.
Nan
Debbie,
Both my son and a good girlfriend said to me that they didn't think I needed WLS. I asked them if they wanted me around for many more years. With the co-morbidities that I had, my life wouldn't last very long. I'm now off bp meds and diabetes meds. Those were two big problems with me. I go to the doctor next Tuesday and he'll do some blood work and we'll see how well I'm doing with the cholesterol. Oh, I've had no problem with my acid reflux either. You didn't make this decision on the spur of the moment, you've thought about it and weighed the risks. This is your life and you need to do what you need to do. Not everyone will be supportive.
We're here for you.
Jan
Both my son and a good girlfriend said to me that they didn't think I needed WLS. I asked them if they wanted me around for many more years. With the co-morbidities that I had, my life wouldn't last very long. I'm now off bp meds and diabetes meds. Those were two big problems with me. I go to the doctor next Tuesday and he'll do some blood work and we'll see how well I'm doing with the cholesterol. Oh, I've had no problem with my acid reflux either. You didn't make this decision on the spur of the moment, you've thought about it and weighed the risks. This is your life and you need to do what you need to do. Not everyone will be supportive.
We're here for you.
Jan
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