Confession: I like my body (HOLY MOLY!!)

Ok, so I am still swollen and scarred.  I have a drain still and I have to wear this God foresaken compression garment that leaves marks all over.  But.... for the very first time in my entire life, when I see my body in the mirror, I can actually say I like what I see. 

Having been a chubby kid and an obese adult, the ability to say that I don't hate it when I look at my body and in fact, I can actually see that it looks pretty darn good, that is a BIG BIG deal.  I was the one that always hide my body, felt insecure all the time and was embarrassed to even let me hubby see me full on naked.  I've walked around buck naked more in the past 2 weeks that I have in our entire relationship.  (not that I am going all out right now, but since I never walked naked w/o something at least held against me before, my average just shot up exponentially) 

So although this is drastic.  It can be painful (although I have been lucky) and it was a long long LONG road to get to this point and of course, I'm never going to be Miss America.  But you know what?  I'm ok with that.  And I actually have some peace with myself that I never anticipated that I would have.  Wow .  Who knew? 

:-)

 

Really happy for you, and I totally get how you feel! Enjoy!

It is a wonderful feeling! So happy for you!!

Robyn, thank you SO much for your generosity in sharing this.

I have also had a lifelong struggle with my weight – 32 lbs at 1 yr old, first diet 2/12 yr old, 184 lbs in grade 4, 290 lbs just before my 13^th birthday to a high of about 400lbs in my late 20’s. I’m now 53 and back up to 269 (I’m 6ft tall).

I was almost at my goal after VSG when I was put on medication for a brain injury (car accident) that caused me to gain 68 pounds so I am trying to address that without much success. I am still recovering from the injuries caused from the car accident and everything takes so much effort now. I have been considering and working towards having a revision to DS, which given my situation often feels like a pipe dream. The plan was to have completed all my plastics by this point and be celebrating my new body with a gathering of Dr Sauceda’s patients this week (can you tell I’m feeling a little sorry for myself?)

Thank you so very much for sharing your experience. This is what I want so badly for myself. I intend to re-read your post each day to keep me motivated.

It may take me another couple of years to get to your position BUT I will get there.

I wish you every success in the world. You are such inspiration…good luck with your running.

Tricia

Oh, you are very welcome and thanks for your kind words.  I'm glad that my post can help in any way. It really is amazing to me that I can look down and think, "wow!" rather than "ugh"  

I'm sorry to hear about your accident.  That must be so frustrating so I can understand feeling like you do.  I hope that you will be able to keep moving forward on your journey though.  It would be easy for me to say "keep the faith" so instead I will say, that I will keep you in my thoughts and send you some good healing vibes.  

 

 

Thank you...you are such a sweetheart!

Congrats! It is nice feeling, I was so excited the first 2 weeks at seeing myself in the mirror. Those that have never been obese or have not had body image issues and negative self talk may not understand. But for those that do, this is not plastic surgery, but necessary reconstructive surgery. I feel like I look normal and that I am not disfigured now finally, even with the scars, the open sores, and the seroma.

Of course, as expected, my enthusiasm wanes, as I deal with complications, and just want to feel healthy and get back to normal routine. And my arms look even worse to me now that other areas had skin removed, but oh well for now.

Sorry to hear about your accident wholenewme poster. I hope you recover fully soon and obtain the weight loss again and your ps.