New TLC reality show Big Sexy

It's always interesting and a bit sadding for me to see people who once were over weight be so critical of those that still are.  I pray to GOD that I don't ever become that person. 

IMO...I've watched the shows and I like it.  I don't think the show says that being overweight is ok.  As a matter of fact, the women the show follows talk quite frank about thier weight issues, how they are precieved, how it affects thier self esteem and about the challenges that come with being overweight.  The show also shows how mean and cruel people are towards them.  Even you the OP admit that your eatting was fueled by your own self  hatred...which I'm sure was not helped by how people treated you because of your weight.  I think it's important for people to see that overweight people are PEOPLE.  We're not some subspecies and discrimination against overweight people is not and should not be acceptable.

And I also just want to note....every overweight person is not unhealthy....and just because that was/is YOUR story doesn't mean that it's THIER story.  When I was the size of the women on the show (a size 16-18ish) I wasn't.  I played college sports and was an all-american and even tired out for the olympic team and made it as an alternate.  I could out run most "skinny" women I hit the gym like a beast and I was a solid 200lbs.  I didn't have any medical issues and I was quite happy with my appearance and I felt GOOD.  It wasn't until I went through a really tramatic experience where I turned to food for comfort and my weight balloned that I started developing the weight related issues...and even then I was still relatively healthy.  Even now, my reasons for having surgery had/have little to do with having comorbilities (which I don't even at my current weight), but had more to do with wanting to get back to that place and person I was at 200lbs. 

I think it's a great thing actually. Personally, I find acceptance to be a universal right rather than conditional acceptance which is really what most of us have. Good for those women and kudos to them for putting out a message that says you can be confident, healthy, happy and enjoying life without being a size 4.

I think it's a positive message and shows the women who are just like them that you don't have to starve yourself into skinny to be happy and proud of who you are. As far as being ok to be morbidly obese - well frankly, it is. Though it's not ideal for your long term health, it still remains that it is ok to be there and those women should be regarded as happy, fulfilled women not overweight women.

I think it's a very fine line you're asking for. Either it's ok or it's not. If it's not ok, I don't think it's fair to ask people to treat it as acceptable. It's not ideal, but its ok. Big can be healthy and I think it's important not to assume that simply by being overweight these women are unhealthy. I have a friend who weighs 50 lbs more than I do and at 225 she is definitely overweight but runs marathons and triathalons!! She's probably healthier than I am!

Frankly, I've been overweight and had to live my life as such. I sympathize, understand and can relate to every overweight person I see and choose to simply continue treating them with the respect and dignity that I treat every other person with. Of all people, I've been there, I should understand.

Well, I think it is OK to be morbidly obese and it is OK to be average weight.

I also think it is OK to accept ourselves (and other people) as we are and to love ourselves but to also want to make some changes.  For instance, I want to make some changes in my diet.  I want to eat less processed foods and eat more fresh, organic, whole foods.  I think eating a lot of heavily processed foods is not very healthy.  However, I think that it is OK for people to eat processed foods if they want to.  I also like myself right now even though I eat more processed foods than I think is ideal.  The fact that I want to change that about myself does not mean I hate myself.

People define health in different ways.  Of course, many morbidly obese people are diagnosed with conditions like diabetes, high blood pressure and sleep apnea and most of us would agree that if you have those things, you are not healthy.  I actually did not have any comorbidities (yet) when I was morbidly obese, though.  I guess my point is, do we want to say that it is not OK to be unhealthy in any way?  And who gets to define what is and is not healthy?

I LOVE THE SHOW !!!  I really like the women on the show and I think the topic is LONG OVER DUE for tv.  Im already addicted to this show.... a show I can finally relate to!
Even though they are proud of themselves, they still speak about and show the women in different situations having to deal with weight issues... i.e. diagnosed with thyroid disorder, being heckled for being overweight on the streets of South Beach, agent telling one woman they will drop her from her modeling agency if she doesn't lose weight.
And they really are gorgeous! 
Don't knock the show till you have given it a try.  Its a heck of a lot more interesting to watch than the usual typical realtiy shows filled with young skinny people getting drunk all the time... although that can be entertaining sometimes.  LOL!

And BTW.... another reality show i LOVE is "Roseanne's Nuts" (Roseanne Barr)  ... not only has shows about weight issues, but women issues and age issues.   VERY FUNNY!!!

I am still overweight, and I have a problem with the show. I think its wonderful if you feel good and are accepting of your body no matter your size - I wish that for ALL people, I really do. But I don't think its realistic for my daughter to look at a show and think that 100 pounds plus overweight people are all that happy and free and loving life. I was not. Ever. And I had no health issues prior to RNY. But I couldn't run fast, I struggled with exercise, and I was so frustrated with my body and appearance I was often ugly and bitter to my husband and those around me.

The ugly truth is 99.9% of the male population isn't going to ask my daughter out if she's overweight. Most people do NOT see past that. My husband never cared, but he did want me to be happier with myself, and I couldn't. Not until now. My whole life and demeanor including my job is better for having had this surgery. I can't ever see that happening at 100 plus pounds overweight and I just can't advocate it.

When I someone who looks like I used to, I want to help them. I don't judge them, ever - I feel like I know how they feel. But maybe I don't - several of you have stated you were happy in your skin overweight and I respect that.

Do you think that if your daughter sees that show, she will think all overweight people are happy and free and loving life?  I don't know how old your daughter is.  Is she too young to understand that this show is about how some overweight people feel about their bodies and their lives but that some people feel differently? 

You don't want her to think that all overweight people struggle with exercise and are frustrated with their bodies and appearance and are often ugly and bitter to those around them, right?

You say your whole life and demeanor including your job are better for having surgery and you can't see that happening at 100 plus pounds overweight and you just can't advocate it.  I'm not sure what it is that you can't advocate.  You can't advocate life being good at 100 plus pounds overweight?  Why not?  I am in favor of life being good at any weight.

If what you mean is that you can't advocate people be 100 plus pounds overweight, well, I don't advocate that either.  I don't advocate people being any certain weight.  I advocate people strive to reach whatever weight they feel is right for them, and I am still in favor of life being good at any weight.

I'm sorry, what I meant is that I can't advocate that being 100 plus lbs overweight is a good thing or that most people are happy that way.



My daughter is 12. She is struggling with weight issues already. I am trying to make sure that we only have healthy food in our house for the most part, and I am keeping her very active. And keeping my mouth shut. I don't want to give her any issues/complexes or make her feel guilty about eating in any way. I've lived that my entire life and I so don't want it for her.



My family realizes how unhappy I was overweight. That was certainly only one aspect of my unhappiness - obviously you can be overweight and happy otherwise with other parts of your life. For the most part, I was not. Losing this much weight has been the key for me - to exercise more, to do more, to be happy, to feel free of exhaustion and bitterness and feeling less than myself. I certainly WANT my daughter to feel (and everyone else) to feel that way regardless of their weight - I just know that I never could.

But you feel OK about advocating that most people are unhappy if they are overweight?

You don't want to give her a complex....but you don't want her to see happy fat people....I'm confused?  You only want her to see unhappy miserable fat people....why?  So she won't want to be fat?  So she'll word harder to fight her weight issue?  She's 12 and struggling already...12 is already a hard time for girls...personally I'd think that showing her happy overweight people would be a good message so that she doesn't think she's doomed to a miserable life IF she continues to have a weight issue as a teen or even adult.

If your family realizes how miserable you were overweight....at 12, I'm sure your daughter has already digested that message.  She's also digesting the message that  you lost weight and now feel so much better about yourself and your life.  I would be more concerned about the message that less weight = happiness....espically if she's not seeing that you can be happy no matter what your weight.

I think its important to show kids that you can be happy just the way you are...because you are perfect and made in God's image....and that includes fat people.