OT

BetterFutureAhead
on 7/18/12 5:18 am, edited 7/19/12 1:53 pm - DE

this is no longer here i deleted it

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the differance!!

Michelle V.
on 7/18/12 5:23 am - Livonia, MI

RNY on 12/14/11

I strongly suggest pre marital counseling.

ToNewBeginnings
on 7/18/12 5:25 am

Is this a joke?

Cynthia L.
on 7/18/12 5:52 am - Clarence, NY

RNY on 06/04/08

So, I'm not the only thinking thinking this? Whew!

To the OP, what about those texts indicate this dude is husband material? I'd not touch his junk
with someone ELSE'S lady parts! YUCK.
Due to the fact that you've put up with such behavior or wven question it, you may not be WIFE material, at least at this time in your life.

Bottom line, if your relationship resembles (in any real way) the folks on Jerry Springer, YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG! It's time to reassess what YOU want, need (and deserve) from
a relationship. I hope, for your sake, this isn't it.

Life is too short to be around sucky people.

-Cyn

Bad boys get spanked. - Chrissie Hynde

volky64
on 7/18/12 5:27 am

RNY on 09/27/11

Wow. Not sure what to say. To me, it would sound like something is up. Over the years, I've found that you just have to trust your gut. Take this from someone who's been burned too many times. I always wanted to see the best in people, but sometimes people lie. I'm sorry honey, but I would proceed with extreme caution.

happy_baker
on 7/18/12 5:31 am, edited 7/18/12 5:36 am

RNY on 02/15/12

Ok, tough love a-comin'. But it truly does come from a place of love.

Girl, you have to open your eyes. I'm not sure in what world "Hey baby, I love you, are you up? When can I see you?" texts are harmless. Would he let you meet this woman? Does he ever hang out with her in your presence? If you were to receive a text like that from a man, what would your fiance say?

Before I got married, my longest relationship with a man was 6 years. And we broke up. Just because you've been together a long time does NOT mean you are meant to marry and spend your lives together. He may have told you God spoke to him about you, but this is also coming from the same man who has cheated on you, lied to you, and is (probably) still lying to you. I know you said you've done the same to him in the past, but it really, really seems like that chapter of his behavior has not closed.

If you truly, in your heart of hearts, believe he is telling you the truth, then I suggest you meet this woman, explain that the texts are inappropriate, and work through the issue with your fiance, perhaps with a counselor.

If you don't believe him (and your stomach ache and butterflies suggest that this is the case. Women's intuition is a powerful thing) it may be time to move on and find someone you can trust, someone who is honest with you, and who doesn't have random women texting him in the middle of the night. You deserve better.

Bottom line--how far does it have to go before you stop believing him? Do you have to physically catch him naked in bed with another woman? Is his word good enough for you, and does it refute what your heart tells you?

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Sarah R.
on 7/18/12 5:31 am

RNY on 05/09/11

Sounds like you dont have a real good basis to get married, you have both cheated in the past and he is still texting someone....you may want to get out and then get some counseling cause if you were also cheating in this 5 year span you got some things to fix before you go into something new.