Your Hospital Story
So everyone talks about how pain free and easy it was after surgery in the Hospital sometimes people like Larry don't remember the whole thing some of us remember all to well.
To show how varied a hospital stay can be after surgery share your story.
To show how varied a hospital stay can be after surgery share your story.
Paul C.
First 5K 9/27/20 46:32 - 11 weeks post op (PR 28:55 8/15/11)
First 10K 7/04/2011 1:03 First 15K 9/18/2011 1:37
First Half Marathon 10/02/2011 2:27:44 (PR 2:24:35)
First Half Ironman 9/30/12 7:32:04
First 5K 9/27/20 46:32 - 11 weeks post op (PR 28:55 8/15/11)
First 10K 7/04/2011 1:03 First 15K 9/18/2011 1:37
First Half Marathon 10/02/2011 2:27:44 (PR 2:24:35)
First Half Ironman 9/30/12 7:32:04
I'll share and everyone can have a good laugh and people will feel better about their experience.
So I am a few hours out of surgery and I gott **** thanks to all the IVs. Nurse gives me a jug and I say "Sorry but as an adult my bladder refuses to release while I am in a bed". They Clear me to go sit on the throne. Now we all know those freaking gowns are a pain so I slide mine over the IVs and hang it on the IV Cart while I sit to leak (Totally acceptable in the man card rules because I barely could stand). Any HOW! my wife sees one of my sites bleeding and points it out and goes to get a nurse.
Next thing I know I open my eyes with a room full of strangers and my wife yelling for me to open my eyes. It seems I had passed out to the point the called a code, this code however is automatically elevated to a code blue so as my mom stands in the hall way in flys a guy with a crash cart! Lucklily I had opened my eyes before he got to me.
I look around and tell my wife "I need my gym shorts" and everyone is like don't worry....
Needless to say between the toilet and my bed my gym shorts made it on. Later I find out that I weighed so much and **** that I had a mush mark from that little shower head thing on the pack of a Hospital toilet.
What the hell is that thing anyways?
So I am a few hours out of surgery and I gott **** thanks to all the IVs. Nurse gives me a jug and I say "Sorry but as an adult my bladder refuses to release while I am in a bed". They Clear me to go sit on the throne. Now we all know those freaking gowns are a pain so I slide mine over the IVs and hang it on the IV Cart while I sit to leak (Totally acceptable in the man card rules because I barely could stand). Any HOW! my wife sees one of my sites bleeding and points it out and goes to get a nurse.
Next thing I know I open my eyes with a room full of strangers and my wife yelling for me to open my eyes. It seems I had passed out to the point the called a code, this code however is automatically elevated to a code blue so as my mom stands in the hall way in flys a guy with a crash cart! Lucklily I had opened my eyes before he got to me.
I look around and tell my wife "I need my gym shorts" and everyone is like don't worry....
Needless to say between the toilet and my bed my gym shorts made it on. Later I find out that I weighed so much and **** that I had a mush mark from that little shower head thing on the pack of a Hospital toilet.
What the hell is that thing anyways?
Paul C.
First 5K 9/27/20 46:32 - 11 weeks post op (PR 28:55 8/15/11)
First 10K 7/04/2011 1:03 First 15K 9/18/2011 1:37
First Half Marathon 10/02/2011 2:27:44 (PR 2:24:35)
First Half Ironman 9/30/12 7:32:04
First 5K 9/27/20 46:32 - 11 weeks post op (PR 28:55 8/15/11)
First 10K 7/04/2011 1:03 First 15K 9/18/2011 1:37
First Half Marathon 10/02/2011 2:27:44 (PR 2:24:35)
First Half Ironman 9/30/12 7:32:04
I had open surgery, so my first two days were pretty difficult... Lots of trouble -- and PAIN -- getting in and out of bed with an 8-in*****ision down my belly and a BMI of 57! I also had a morphine pump the first two days, though, so it wasn't terrible. Less pain than with my hernia repair or tummy tuck!
My only interesting story: I have a significant history of blood clots so I always have the SCD compression sleeves on my legs when in the hospital. I wasn't putting out enough urine initially so they gave me a diuretic on Day Two. So there I am, middle of the night, having to pee, but trapped in bed because, with the huge incision, I couldn't bend enough to be able to get the SCD sleeves off my legs so I could get out of bed. I pressed the call button twice to tell them that I had to go but needed someone to get the sleeves off. Well, you know how they have fewer nurses after midnight... so thirty minutes later, STILL no nurse... so I hit the morphine pump button and then struggled to get one of the sleeves off, but couldn't teach the other one no matter how i tried, so I pressed the call button one more time, told the woman at the desk that I was STILL waiting and was ready to explode, and that if there wasn't a nurse in my room in the next 5 minutes I was just going to pee in the bed. Four minutes later the *****y nurse comes in (it seems like there has to be ONE of those every hospital stay), chastises me for not being more patient (I'm sorry, but I think waiting 30 minutes when on a diuretic is plenty patient!), and gets the other sleeve off. Apparently, the extra full bladder and morphine wasn't a good combination, because almost as soon as I stood up, my bladder just let go and I peed on the floor and on one of the *****y nurse's shoes!
guess how long it took them to get someone to help me the next time I rang for assistance to be able to get up and use the bathroom, LOL...
Lora
My only interesting story: I have a significant history of blood clots so I always have the SCD compression sleeves on my legs when in the hospital. I wasn't putting out enough urine initially so they gave me a diuretic on Day Two. So there I am, middle of the night, having to pee, but trapped in bed because, with the huge incision, I couldn't bend enough to be able to get the SCD sleeves off my legs so I could get out of bed. I pressed the call button twice to tell them that I had to go but needed someone to get the sleeves off. Well, you know how they have fewer nurses after midnight... so thirty minutes later, STILL no nurse... so I hit the morphine pump button and then struggled to get one of the sleeves off, but couldn't teach the other one no matter how i tried, so I pressed the call button one more time, told the woman at the desk that I was STILL waiting and was ready to explode, and that if there wasn't a nurse in my room in the next 5 minutes I was just going to pee in the bed. Four minutes later the *****y nurse comes in (it seems like there has to be ONE of those every hospital stay), chastises me for not being more patient (I'm sorry, but I think waiting 30 minutes when on a diuretic is plenty patient!), and gets the other sleeve off. Apparently, the extra full bladder and morphine wasn't a good combination, because almost as soon as I stood up, my bladder just let go and I peed on the floor and on one of the *****y nurse's shoes!
guess how long it took them to get someone to help me the next time I rang for assistance to be able to get up and use the bathroom, LOL...
Lora
14 years out; 190 pounds lost, 165 pound loss maintained
You don't drown by falling in the water. You drown by staying there.
Now who is going to want to follow that story! 
Mine is boring!
I do remember having potassium drip which they said was to control my pain, but I don't remember the pain, just the stingi-ness of the drip.
I am one that needles hate. Getting my blood is nearly impossible so I hate the process. The next morning a young guy pops into my room all cheery and says "good morning! I'm here to take some blood!" I was barely awake...so my response "Good luck". He looked so crestfallen I immediately apologized and explained why I said that.
I did have one nurse comment on the tan lines on my back, which was weird, glad she did not comment on my big butt.
Also had a lot of comments of the tattoos on my feet. I have my sons feet from his birth certificate, one on each foot.
My big scare was leaving the hospital. I got into the passenger seat and went to lean it back a little....and it dropped my flat. I thought both my Mom (she was my driver) and I were going to have heart attacks. I kind of laid there a minute to make sure I couldn't feel any damage, but seems I was fine, so came back to a more seated position and a slower heart rate.
And on a medicine note...they gave me a prescription for suppositories in case of nausea. I learned those need to be stored in the fridge. I was very thankful I did not have nausea, because it was going to take a lot for me to insert something super cold up my keester!
Mine is boring!I do remember having potassium drip which they said was to control my pain, but I don't remember the pain, just the stingi-ness of the drip.
I am one that needles hate. Getting my blood is nearly impossible so I hate the process. The next morning a young guy pops into my room all cheery and says "good morning! I'm here to take some blood!" I was barely awake...so my response "Good luck". He looked so crestfallen I immediately apologized and explained why I said that.
I did have one nurse comment on the tan lines on my back, which was weird, glad she did not comment on my big butt.
Also had a lot of comments of the tattoos on my feet. I have my sons feet from his birth certificate, one on each foot.
My big scare was leaving the hospital. I got into the passenger seat and went to lean it back a little....and it dropped my flat. I thought both my Mom (she was my driver) and I were going to have heart attacks. I kind of laid there a minute to make sure I couldn't feel any damage, but seems I was fine, so came back to a more seated position and a slower heart rate.
And on a medicine note...they gave me a prescription for suppositories in case of nausea. I learned those need to be stored in the fridge. I was very thankful I did not have nausea, because it was going to take a lot for me to insert something super cold up my keester!
Just When The Caterpillar Thought The World Was Over, She Became A Butterfly.
--Proverb
--Proverb
Paul, I can just see it all happening!My story is pretty boring: I checked in, hung out, the anesthesiologist came out and cracked jokes, Dr Surgeon did not stop by before surgery, they wheeled me in, operated (and for all I know staged a production of Madame Butterfly and told me the winning lottery numbers), then wheeled me to recovery.
A couple of things that do stand out for whatever reason: My husband brought me a hilarious book called Awkward Family Photos. I had to stop looking at it because I was laughing too hard and it hurt.
I had hardly any pain. Why? Cause I had a pain pump and I used that mofo!
I slept every chance I got. I made them wake me up if they need something from me. I wanted that time to pass and didn't want to be screwed with. According to Dr Surgeon, most folks can't sleep in the hospital. Didn't bother me one iota. I can sleep thru a hurricane.
I fight badgers with spoons.
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