Buyer's remorse

I have been reading on this forum everyday for the last 8 months and often hear of people questioning their dicisions. Has anyone NOT experienced buyer's remorse??? And why do you believe you didn't?

I researched RNY for a few years before I had the surgery. I knew for the most part what would happen after the surgery so I have never regretted it yet. The only problems I have had have been caused by me. I really think that the people I talk too *****gret it do so because they really did not understand what a complete lifestyle change they would have to under go.

I am only 9 weeks out and was quite ill when they did my surgery, making breathing very difficult.  I also had extreme nausea the first three days and every single time I stood, from the first time two hours after surgery, I dry-heaved for a long time.  My surgeon does not "believe" in providing anti-nausea meds but between my son, daughter-in-law, and friends we managed to convince to make an exception for me :)

Having said all that, there has not yet been a single instant of time that I regretted my decision.  I went into this with pretty realistic expectations after a whole lot of reading and resear*****luding books, online, meetings and friends who've had WLS.  I don't expect miracles, I don't expect it to be easy...but I do FINALLY have a hope and expectation that there will finally be something achieved from all my effort, vs all the years I've worked so, so hard and gotten nowhere. 

I guess I'm pretty pragmatic and 'logical' because I don't experience a lot of emotional highs and lows over this.  Frustration, yes but that is expected.  But I know I will finally get where I should be and I am very much happy about that!

i didn't. i think a lot of it had to do with a great support system constantly telling me that i made the right decision and how i was doing the right thing. so many people experience negativity but i had zero, except from my ex that i rarely talk to, but was expecting it when i told him so i don't even count that. i also spent a lot of time researching and talking with all my doctors before my surgery which helped to reassure me before it happened.

I had very limited fleeting moments of buyer's remorse. Never lasting very long (never more than a half hour). Most of it was head hunger, and missing foods or eating in excess. It was having to face the feelings and emotions that used to cause me to eat. I went to therapy at 2 weeks post op and stayed in therapy the first 3 mo. to deal with those issues that caused the brief moments of wtf did I do this for?

Had I known I would feel that way I would of started working on it before surgery and don't think I would have faced it at all.

On day 2 I woke up and thought oh dear God what have I done!?! But I had several complications and A LOT of pain. By the end of the day I realized those feelings were normal and I got over it. I saw my surgeon today for my one week check up and he asked me if I had regrets yet. He was joking about it saying he had a lot of enemies the first week but after a few weeks we would be friends again.

I'm glad you're better. What kind of complications did you have ?

The only time I have thought oh God what have i done is when my family went to the beach and they were eating pizza. I was only 10 days out. I excused myself and went to my car to cry. After that i saw the weight just coming off. I was proud because I was resisting.

Not all have it.  At my age and the inability to walk without a walker took care of any doubt I would have had.  I went through some really rough recovery but never looked back.  What good would it do anyway?  I cannot imagine having this surgery and 3 or 4 days out going, "OMG! What did I do to myself?"  Post-op requires recovery and getting the anesthetic out of your system.  No way can you get re-routed and be healed right away. I remember reading a post not too long ago someone wanted her surgery reversed and she just had surgery 3 or 4 days prior.  I was mortified to say the least.  Obviously she was NOT prepared at all for what she just had done to her body.  Has the journey been easy for me? At times yes and at times no.  In the beginning was the most difficult because of all the major changes and wrapping your head around it all.   

Anyway, I am assuming you are pre-op or thinking about surgery. I should have checked before I posted. I would do it over in a heart beat and I will be a year out next month.  Best of luck and research and learn as much as you can.  Jane

I had some difficult days early out in terms of emotions (not in terms of complications or trouble eating or drinking) that frustrated and depressed me, but I never regretted the surgery itself.  I had done a lot of research and knew what I was "getting myself into", and really thought long and hard about whether I was ready for surgery, if there was anything else less drastic than surgery that I could try first, etc..  I also considered two surgeons, asked questions about their post-op eating plans and rules, follow-up, etc.  I selected a surgeon who did NOT have a long period of liquids post-op because I knew that would be very difficult for me.  (There were a number of other reasons I selected her, of course, but that was something that factored into my decision, whereas some people don't even consider how difficult their post-op plan might be, or don't even consider more than one surgeon who might have a different approach to all sorts of things.)

There are actually a fairly small number of people who truly regret their decision once they get beyond the first couple of months, so the "buyer's remorse" is often just a response to the somewhat overwhelming physical, emotional, and psychological changes of the first month or so after surgery.  There are, however, some people who just jump at the surgery because they think it is an easy way to get the weight off and never really consider what they are going to have to go through after surgery (like weeks of liquids only for some surgeon's patients). Once reality kicks in, they truly DO wonder what the hell they were thinking when they went into the operating room.

Lora