Pre Op looking at myself makes me sick sometime
on 9/1/13 6:55 am
Then you are doing the right thing by getting help by having surgery. I would also suggest maybe getting some counseling as well. You need to be both physically and mentally prepared for this surgery as it is not an easy ride. But you have taken the first step... Congrats,
As someone who counsels women with weight issues, I would caution you to be realistic about how losing the weight will "change my life". Numerous studies show that people who were depressed before WLS had a marked decrease in depression for the first year or so after surgery, but that by the time they were two years out around 75% of them had depression levels similar to what they had pre-op. There were three reasons for this. The first was that the depression was chronic (and the distraction and joy over losing the weight caused a temporary lifting of it), the second was that some people were very dissatisfied with the way their body looked after loosing a massive amount of weight. The third, and most common, reason, was that people attributed some of their problems (job, relationships, financial, etc.) to their weight and therefore expected those problems to disappear once they lost the weight. The depression returned when people realized that they still as those problems (because the problems actually had nothing to do with their weight).
Yes, life is better in many ways when we are a normal size instead of being obese, morbidly obese, or super morbidly obese, but that does NOT mean that most existing problems (or even any of them, in some cases) will go away. Romantic relationships that were problematic before WLS generally get worse after surgery. Confidence usually rises after losing weight, but low self esteem often remains because it is based deeper than just the weight.
It will probably be useful to talk with your counselor about your expectations of how your life will be different so that you don't set yourself up for disappointment.
Lora
14 years out; 190 pounds lost, 165 pound loss maintained
You don't drown by falling in the water. You drown by staying there.
Body image is a hard thing to deal with, and I wish I could say that losing the weight will permanently fix it but can't make that promise.... WLS can help get you physically to the place you want to go, but self-loathing is a mental thing and it's in the mind that the work needs to take place. Anything from a self-help workbook (e.g. The Body Image Workbook) to individual counseling can help undo the pain of self-image. Good luck! It can get better!
First ultra: Stone Mill 50 miler 11/15/14 13:44:38, First Full Marathon: Marine Corps 10/27/13 4:57:11, Half Marathon PR 2:04:43 at Shamrock VA Beach Half-Marathon, 12/2/12 First Half-Marathon 2:32:47, 5K PR Run Under the Lights 5K 27:23 on 11/23/13, 10K PR 52:53 Pike's Peek 10K 4/21/13, (1st timed run) Accumen 8K 51:09 10/14/12.
