x-post: Sister with learning disability and RNY

I'm cross-posting this because I got great responses on the RNY board and I thought perhaps some people on my dear VSG board who also have experience with RNY and/or autistic/special-needs people might have great suggestions as well!  So far the responses have been that my plan should be similar to my sister's plan, use visual aids, make a list of "always foods" "sometimes foods" and "once-in-a-while" foods and setting alarms on her phone for when to take vitamins and drink after meals.  Thanks for reading!

Hello all,

I hope you don't mind a visitor from the VSG forum but I'm looking for some help with regards to RNY.  My background, I'm 27, had a lapband and revised to VSG this year.  This post is for my sister.  She is 20 years old and had RNY almost a year ago.  Her starting weight was around 300 pounds, but she is special.  She is learning disabled.  We've never been able to get a real diagnosis for her throughout the years but she is what I would call a high functioning autistic person.  Very sociable, very aware but very behind with education (has a low reading level, can only do simple math).  A year or two ago, we thought she might have Praedar Willie's syndrome but after testing was done they could not diagnose her with it.  One main feature of PW's syndrome is an uncontrollable desire to eat and never feeling satiated.  She has never felt full and would just eat and eat and eat until you told her "no you cannot eat anymore". 

She was prediabetic and with consultation from her doctors and my parents, she decided to get weight loss surgery.  It was the best decision for her and I'm very happy she did it.  She has lost 83lbs in a year, she's very tall so I think she will always be on the "big" side but I'm concerned about her eating.  She works out but like this past weekend (Memorial Day) we had a big family party.  My family tries to make healthful foods for us usually but they still don't make the best foods at parties (chips, desserts, hot dogs, etc) and my sister, just could not control herself.  She doesn't eat to the point where she gets ill but I can tell she isn't making the right choices or doesn't know HOW to make the right choices.

My point in posting this is I want to help her.  She doesn't get to follow up with her surgeon/NUT as much as I do (we have different surgeons) and so I really want to be her aid.  I've been very successful with my VSG but I recognize that it is a different surgery and she has different requirements than I do.  For instance, with VSG, I know that I need to keep my carbs low, protein high, and I eat within a range of 600-800 calories.  I'm not always perfect but that's what I aim for.  I'm on myfitnesspal every day logging my food, good or bad.  I'd like to know what the basics are for RNY...like, what calorie range is optimal for weight loss and keeping it off?  I think with any surgery carbs should be avoided but is there a specific number or rule you guys go by? 

My mother is a saint but she works all day and it's hard for to always be the "food police" and my father is on disability and diabetic who doesn't take care of himself (eating-wise).  I don't live in the house anymore but I really want to help my sister as much as I can and teach her ways to make the right decisions.  With regards to summer parties, I plan on making food for us that is healthful because I need a kick in the butt sometimes too with my eating decisions! 

I'm sorry this is long but I appreciate any help, advice, tips, support, anything that I receive!  Thank you!

reading this post  is the best ive read in a very long time , the love you have for your family is wonderful ,   believe it  that  by the love you  show in supporting  your Sister is worth more then anything  you could give  ,     you take each day  at a time ,   maybe introduce your sister to newer healthy foods  so she may require more a taste for that ,    like  pizza for example  she may love pizza  but you can work the crust  also the cheese  to lower the fat and carb intake  and she gets a nice healthy food ,    maybe even  dont  worry so much about the food   perhaps trying to keep your sister active  so what she did eat will burn off  more calories ,     your family i bet must be very proud of your support  whatever you do   keep always being you 

Thank you for your kind words :)