well I think we're going to lose house DESPITE the commitment letter

I am so sorry Ava,  you do DESERVE BETTER!!! I hope you find your way, and maybe losing the house is for the best... I am a firm believer that things happen for a reason, and although things feel awful right now, maybe this HAS to happen to you right now in order for the real wonderful things that are yet to come for you.  Hang tough sista and believe! XO