Monday, October 27, 2025

117.8

Well golf and dinner out last night became wet affairs! We only got 3 holes in and my last 2 putts on the 3rd hole were accomplished while DH held an umbrella over me. We went home, dried up, then went to our friend's home for a drink before dinner out. By the time we left for the restaurant it was like a monsoon outside. Even with umbrellas we got soaked getting to the car, then into the restaurant. Nice place but we had to sit inside because of the rain. I think DH and I would like to go back and sit at one of the outside bars on a nice weather night (the restaurant is on the water and has lots of good outdoor space). We had fun with our friends though!

Today is the filler this morning, then an appointment with the endocrinologist to follow up on my thyroid nodules. They say I am supposed to arrive 1/2 hour before the afternoon appointment! I get adding 15 minutes for paperwork, but 1/2 hour? I think they are overdoing the time to avoid delays but since I am always on time it annoys me that I will probably be sitting for an extra 15-20 minutes. One of those times when I feel like my time is valued way lower than the physician's.

So I was thinking about Peps' and Diane's issues with paper piling up and why I don't have that problem anymore though I used to have stacks and stacks of it in my kitchen and office. It is because I am essentially paperless for everything! I started doing that at work because my office was going paperless, but have continued it over the years more and more at home. All those "papers" are electronic now! Bills, notices and receipts are in my email or stored in electronic folders. Tons of notes to myself and lists are in my electronic notepad. My calendar is electronic so I throw away appointment cards once I transfer the information. Pictures are overflowing in my photo app. So there is just as much "clutter" but it is hidden on my electronic devices. Somewhat easier to find stuff via searches, but still gets a bit messy. And trying to figure out how to pull out enough information to leave for our heirs is a bit hairy.

Just got notice from the club that the golf courses are closed today because we received 6 inches of rain last night. I guess DH won't be golfing today.

Luckily it is dry right now so we can do our Justice walk. I need to skip water aerobics because of my morning doctor appointment. Have a monsoon Monday!

Worrying about how the government shutdown is going to impact a lot of innocent people as it drags on longer. My stepson stops receiving a paycheck this week and his wife is on furlough. I have tried to be extra kind to the TSA people at the airports who are working without pay. My Massachusetts hometown bank is offering no interest loans up to $2500 with one year to pay them back for those affected. Not a lot, but potentially could keep someone afloat for a month.

Super concerning! DD continues to be paid at the VA due to some kind of funding source I don't understand, since she is "client facing". But her boyfriend, who works at IT is expected to be there every day and is not getting paid. (and in fact it is more stringent, he had a dentist appointment he scheduled months ago, it fell during this shutdown time ,and he had to document he was actually going to the dentist even more than normal) Luckily her boyfriend is a big time saver, so he has funds to carry him through, but lots and lots of people don't. And because they are expected to be at work, they can't go do some other job right now to make ends meet.

Today is a mixed bag. This morning my Mom texted me that she thought my Dad messed up her meds, and she couldn't trust him anymore to handle her meds. I agreed, and once again said they needed to hire help. (Although later, after discussing it with my brother, he said he's offered numerous times to set up her meds, and bought pill holders, but they refuse. She wouldn't let the visiting nurse do it either). DH and I went for our coffee. While I was there DB texted that my Mom called 911 and was on her way to the hospital. He said they decided to admit her because she might have pneumonia. I thought that was probably good (not that she might have pneumonia, but that they could help straighten out her meds). We went to the thrift shop where I scored a Kate Spade purse for $12, and a Vera Bradley laptop pouch for $7. So that was fun.

We stopped to look at some furniture, because we desperately need some new living room chairs, and I have decided to take some money from my 401B to buy some. I don't need any of the funds in the 401B to live on. It's not much, but it is can be my fun money. Anyhow, I thought why wait to spend some of it on durable goods. We might as well buy them now and enjoy them the next 15 years. While I was shopping my brother texted he met with a care counselor, and they want my Mom to start hospice and go to a nursing home. She said no. He said that they were going to talk to her again, and he also asked that they send the chaplain. She has received offers to start hospice off and on for the last 5 years. I think her life could be so much better for whatever time she has left (months? years?) if she had palliative care. Right now, She is about 2 hours away. I will go to the hospital tomorrow, even though she says she doesn't want to see anyone. This $%#+ is hard some days. I feel bad for her because I know she's scared and feeling awful. I feel bad for my Dad, because he is probably also scared. I feel bad for my brother dealing with this alone today. I feel sad for myself because it's all so sad.

DH and I are speaking frequently about what we will do when we are no longer able to adequately care for ourselves. I'm not sure how many years we could self pay in skilled care if we need those options. I think we could do a mid range priced independent/assisted living setting for quite a few years. Our fervent hope is to not burden our children unnecessarily. Anyhow a somber day with a few shots of light heartedness. It's going to be that way sometimes.

So sorry you are going through this with your parents. Sounds like some of your mother's problematic temperament has been exacerbated by her confusion. Perhaps having outside influences at the hospital will help to get her where she belongs so she can receive the care she has been refusing.

Not surprised that feeling so helpless in dealing with your mother that you would be thinking about what will happen to you at that point. I think DH and I have been reevaluating that when we lose somebody close in age to us. I especially hate thinking about one of us being left alone suddenly because we still have so many plans. I hope we are both together when we get to that point when we need care and will make arrangements ourselves for the same reason you expressed. We don't want to burden the kids. But hopefully that is a ways off for all of us.

Greetings all

The rain eased up and the sun is out. I started my errands by picking up payroll, spending time at the studio glazing and otherwise puttering. The studio interior is getting some paint and rearranging thanks to the coup on the glass studio. better use of space and ease in the never ending process of pottery being created, dried, first fired, glazed and then second fired. Every piece gets handled through all these step. Our staff works hard.

After that I picked up my new stuff and took it to the gallery and picked up money. Somehow, people at the gallery keep accidentally locking the bathroom door and then closing it from the outside effectively locking everyone out. It is an old house but how people keep doing this is beyond me. Oh well. There is now a secret nail that will open the lock from the outside. I made a quick stop at the grocery and was amused by the old hippie shoppers who were singing along to the Janis Joplin muzak.

Liz sorry you had a soggy evening. But better than being in Jamaica. The reports from there are terrifying. Stay dry all. And good on you for being low paper. I just can't seem to get the hang of it. Too many years of reviewing and preparing paper documents for a living

DD what a tough day you have had. Sometimes I think old people get cranky because that is the only way they think they have control over their lives. Seems like it is a pattern for some aging brains to become more crabby. That certainly was Crazy Pat whose behavior caused my mother's care service to quit. Hospice people are saints and they will do the med management and all kinds of things. I am hoping your mother will accept hospice (maybe if she thinks it is her idea) and have some piece and comfort. Being angry so much must be exhausting.

Well the dogs are on a rampage. Must be a cat in the back yard. So much energy. Wish I had some.

Diane S

Isn't it amazing how a sunny day can make everything look brighter?

Yes, I may have less paper but I probably have way too much in my digital files! And because I can't see it I am no inclined to go cleaning it out.

122.7 I think.

Tomorrow we drive the 3 hours to go see my Mom one last time before moving. We will take her to lunch and then head the 3 hours back home. I needed to bring back the big tote of pictures I used to create my Dad's Cerebration of Life board! I wish she was well enough to fly and visit us in FL. Perhaps if my brother took her she would be able to do the trip. We shall see.

Tomorrow is also the home inspection. Hoping they don't find too many things wrong and nothing too expensive to fix if they do. I'm not too worried since we had one 6 years ago and there were no major red flags. I know we have one leaky faucet and there is some damage to the wood floor in the kitchen where we had a metal dog gate up. We already contracted with someone to fix the floor.

Praying Jamaica will be okay but it sure seems like the devastation will be enormous! Where do they evacuate to anyway? I can't imagine there would be enough flights to get the majority out!

Getting down to the wire! I did travel with my MIL to Florida one last time when she was about 90. We used a wheelchair in the airport and I did all the driving/luggage moving. She did well. If your mother is motivated maybe she can make the trip with help.

DD, I'm sorry about the situation with your mom. It's so hard to make a parent accept help. I was unable to with my mom, so I feel your pain. It's that terrible place where you want to force them to get help and yet as adults with their mental faculties intact, such as they are, you can't make them do anything. So you just have to watch it all unfold until they are no longer in a position to resist, which is generally when it's too late to make their lives comfortable. I wouldn't wi**** on anyone.

It was a beautiful day here today. Lots of balloons. I used the hose enzyme spray on Kirby's potty turf and it's minty fresh now. I also poured boiling water into a red ant hill and hope there is nothing karmic to come of that. It's just dangerous to let them do that in the backyard.

I had a nice visit with the woman who watches my house over the summer as we exchanged check/key. She's so nice and she loves Kirby.

A portapotty showed up in front of my house today, so I assume my roof work should start this week.

I talked to my dad and his wife and apparently he spent Friday night in the ER again. They didn't tell me until today. He's doing well and they swapped the stent and did antibiotics again, but no admittance, which he was happy about. I just hate this cycle for him.

One of the painters took his drone up at the Paint Out in my neighborhood last week and sent me pictures. I'll post them on TT, as they are stunning. I am so darned lucky that these are our sunsets and backdrop!

And for our Wordle players, I got it in 2 for the 67th time today! Still feeling ever so slightly psychic .

Hugs to all...