Deb Breneman

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 Wanted to pass along this free website where you can store your medication information and also set-up automatic reminders to be either texted or e-mailed to you. It's really helping me to stay on schedule.  

<>  Debbie

  I guess I need a kick in the butt.  I'm feeling pretty down today.  It's my 6 mos surgiversary and I guess I was expecting to feel really great about things today but I'm not feeling it.  

First of all, my weight loss has really slowed down.  Last month I lost only 10lbs but this past month it was only lost 5lbs.  I've changed up my exercise, adding strength training and zumba last week.  I hope that helps for next month.  

Although I can wear size 10-12 now, my legs are still fat and the combination of that and the hanging skin and wrinkles on my thighs, butt, stomach and arms makes it hard to enjoy the new size as much right now.   When I ask my husband how I look in things, he looks at me slowly, considering everything and then tells me the TRUTH.  So, I'm not wearing any shorts or anything else that is too revealing at this point.   So, I'm feeling pretty self-conscious about myself about now.  

I only have another 30lbs or so to get to my goal.  When I think about that, it seems amazing.  I'm so happy to begin to think of myself as a "normal weight" person, fitting in with everyone else.  My mind is messing with me and today, I'm just not feeling any of that.  Just looking at the bad news in the mirror.  I guess it would help if I had more good news to report about great losses but I'm hardly seeing the scale move.  Hopefully, things will look up soon.  

Reposting this blog from a SparkPeople.com member.  I agree with most of them.  What do you think?

 

Top 5 Things NOT to Say to Someone Who Has Lost a Lot of Weight   I agree with most of these.  What do you think?

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

I'm one of those people who has lost a lot of weight, and based on a lot of blogs I've read recently, I guess I'm not alone in being annoyed by some of the questions and comments I get from people (some well-meaning and some just gossipy and curious). So I'm putting this list out there for general consumption. 

Without further ado, the Top 5 Things Not to Say to Someone Who Has Lost a Lot of Weight: 


1. "How much weight did you lose?" 

Unless you are really close to the person or you've shared the numbers or weight-related info in the past, don't ask this question. I've been asked it by a few and I know that some are just curious as to the breadth of my acheivement (which is fine) and I know that others are just mentally trying to figure out my starting weight (not so fine). I can almost see the wheels turning: ("OK she lost 90 lbs and she looks like she's around 200, so... wow, she was pushing 300!") You wouldn't ask someone their weight straight out, so this question should almost always be similarly taboo in places that are not weight loss-related communities (i.e. Sparkpeople). 


2. "How did you do it?" (if you don't really don't want to hear or believe the response of "Watching my food intake and exercise.") 

This question can go extremely well if the asker is looking for honest advice for how to lose weight. But if not, this seemingly innocent question can turn ugly quickly when the asker is disappointed that the answer is smarter food choices and more movement and is looking for the name of a diet or a similar quick fix like gastric bypass or band surgery. So unless you want an honest answer and will not question or judge someone's methods, stay away from this one. 


3. "You look so much better now!" 

This is just backhanded, pure and simple. I don't understand why you can't just give a compliment without degrading the way a person looked before. I understand that I was very fat before. I'll never forget that. It has made me who I am today. But I think I looked good, just not very healthy. You wouldn't go up to a person who had a mole removed and say "Wow, it looks so much better now that you got that thing chopped off!" and so it should be with weight loss. "You look great!" will suffice just nicely. 


4. "You're a whole different person!" 

No, I'm not. I'm the same person. My personality did not change, nor did my thoughts or beliefs, or my profession or my family or friends. I may look different, but at the core, I am the same person. I still eat creme brulee and mojitos and I still love TV and movies. The difference is that I eat these things less and I watch less TV in order to make time for exercise. I got a few new hobbies. Those minor changes does not a different person make. I'm not ashamed of who I was before. I loved that person, fat rolls and all. I just needed to feel better, get healthier, and make life easier for myself. Life is not easy for a morbidly obese person. 


5. "I could never do that." 

Yes, you could. And by saying that you couldn't, you're elevating me to some kind of Superwoman when I'm just a mere mortal who REALLY wanted to lose weight and got SERIOUS this time. As much as I'd love to be Goddess of the Universe, I'm just not. It pains me to see a person elevate me (and thereby denigrate herself) by denying that weight loss is possible for her. You can do it. And it will be hard at times, especially at first. And you might not lose weight as quickly as I did. But living healthy and making better choices is completely possible for anyone out there. 


So there's my Top 5. How 'bout you? Do you have any to add to the list? 


EDIT: Oooh, I do... EXTRA CREDIT! 

6. "You should stop losing weight now. You look good the way you are." 

I just got out of the obese BMI category and you're telling me to stop? Why? Because I'm smaller than you now? Because you liked me to be the fat friend to make yourself feel better? Say it with me, "It's NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!" I don't know what my goal weight will be, but I know it's not now. I've got plenty of more work to do!

 I've started using E-Mealz and I really like it.  They have a low-fat option but other stores and other plans as well.  The subscription is $15 for 90 days.  You download meal plans each week which include the menu, simple recipes and shopping list with cost.  I've found it to be really helpful.  Wish I had found it years ago.

E-MEALZ Easy Meals for Busy and Frugal Families 

First goal- Weigh less than my husband (Reached 2/7/10- 2 weeks after surgery)

Second goal- Onderland (Reached 4/15/10)

Third goal- 170 Overweight instead of Obese (Reached 7/2/10)

Fourth goal- Under 144 Normal weight   (I'd love to be 135 but we'll see.)

 Now that I'm officially out of the "obese" category, I feel like a weight has been figuratively and literally lifted.  What a wonderful feeling.  After losing 70lbs since my surgery and as of today being just "overweight" instead of "obese", it's all downhill from here.    My next goal is to be a "normal" weight and that will be another 27lbs down.  Anything over that is a dream.   I'm so happy.  

I have nothing in my closet that fits any longer (even my shoes are loose).    My necklaces are hanging down lower than they are supposed to.  I'm crossing my legs all of the time now cause I love the feeling.  I like looking at myself in the mirror now.  I actually feel like a normal person now.  I'm getting away from being so self-conscious about the way I look.  Really noticing that I don't stand out anymore.  I wan walk through the turnstile frontways at amusement parks now.... seatbelts are loose on the rides.  I'm LOVING my new life and LOVING my RNY.  

Ok, now the downside.... I don't enjoy eating and would rather not have to.  Sometimes that makes me sad.  I do miss  being able to enjoy eating but if this is the price i have to pay.... I'll deal with it.

 Today I was at 170 with technically makes me in the "overweight" category.  I'm so happy about that.  The past 10lbs have just ticked by soooo slowly it seems.  I'm so happy.  

Pre-op
I was trying to hide as much as possible.  lol


5 mos post-op Down 67lbs

 Driving back from Savannah today with two grandchildren making the trip with us.  They had some of those sour gummy worms and I didn't resist trying them.  I ate a couple thinking well this will tell me if I dump.  No problems.  Then when we were at home I actually ate two chocolate donuts (the little ones).  No problem.  I was surprised that the chocolate donuts had less sugar than I thought but I would still  have thought they would have made me dump.  I'm kind of surprised.  And disappointed in myself.  Now it is going to be more of a challenge to stay away from sweets than it was when I didn't know.  

 Hubby and I driving 12hrs to Savannah to see our new grandson born last week.  Brought a cooler with water bottles and some protein bars with me.  We stopped at Wendy's for lunch and I got a broccoli and cheese potato.  My protein is low for the day but I've gotten in all of my supplements.  We are having tacos at my son's house for dinner so I'll try to get some in there and prob a protein shake tonight.  

Looking forward to seeing some old friends who haven't seen me for a few months.  :)