Chandra_R
I'm 48 years old, 5'11", and when I wandered into the world of WLS five months ago, I weighed 304 lbs., with a 40+ BMI. I've lost 22 lbs. since I started the six-month "medically managed weight loss program" that my insurance requires before they'll consider approving the surgery. Losing weight - that's not a big deal for me - I'm a champion at losing weight! However, I stink at keeping it off, and my body seems to be highly efficient at storing fat. If we ever have a famine in the U.S., I'll surely survive it.
My troubles with my weight started in pre-adolescence. Up until then, I was tall for my age, athletic and lean. Then, seemingly overnight, I was tall, athletic and chubby, surrounded by tiny friends with tiny butts and flat stomachs. They wore sizes 1-2, 3-4; I wore 13-14's. Once I got to full height, I could no longer wear Junior clothing - I couldn't fit in all the cool clothes, because I had to shop in the Women's department. It didn't take me long to stop trying to look good. My uniform became baggy t-shirts over men's jeans (women's jeans weren't long enough). The only thing between me and 200# in high school was athletics. As long as I swam, played basketball, bicycled, and played touch football, my weight was manageable, but I was always the "big girl" in the crowd. Still am.
My participation in sports stopped when I went to college, and without the structure that practices provided, I had no concept of "working out". So I gained several pounds over the "Freshman 15". I was also pretty unenthusiastic about life. I know now that I was severely depressed - another lifelong battle for me, and one that has been woven in with my weight problems. When I got over 200#, I became a (temporary) vegetarian and lost 20#, only to regain it - plus more. And the same pattern has repeated itself throughout my adult life. I've tried all kinds of diets. They were only successful if I was also exercising my butt off (yes, I did learn how to "work out") at the same time. Each time, I would eventually burn out on both the diet and the exercise, stop, and regain - plus more. The last time, when I hit 300#, I lost 40# on the Zone Diet. Same old story. My weight has hovered around the 300# mark for about 2 years now. I have high cholesterol, chronic edema, and my doc tests me for diabetes every time I set foot in her office.
Don't get me wrong - I've got "the good stuff" in my life. My career in child welfare has made me acutely aware of the privileged life I have had. I have, overall, been very healthy throughout my life. In addition, I have two beautiful daughters, the smartest, most adorable granddaughter in the world, a loving family, and great friends. I've got God, too. Well, actually, He's got me. And last year I landed a dream job with an awesome boss and smart, wicked funny and caring coworkers, and I'm looking forward to many more years of working with them.
I'm an overachiever and a caregiver - and there are two sides to both of those. I have a hard time saying, "No", "I want to...", and "This is just for me." I don't know how many times over the years that I've told people, "You can't take care of other people if you don't take care of yourself." I just never applied it to myself. Until now. Doc got my attention - if I don't take care of my health now, I won't be a very good achiever or caregiver in the future.
At first, I thought, "What diet am I going to do now?" Then a friend of mine, interested in the possibility of WLS for herself, dragged me along to a seminar offered by a local bariatric surgery group. I sat there, I listened, I learned, and before I left, I knew what my next step was going to be - RNY. Doc didn't hesitate to give me a referral to that group, New Life Bariatric Surgery Center (a Center of Excellence, thankfully), and I met with my surgeon, Dr. Stephen Boyce, shortly thereafter. New Life is putting together the insurance packet and I'm pulling together the $1500 co-pay and jumping through the insurance company's hoops. I've been doing the research. I know this is a "big surgery", to quote Doc. I know that this won't be easy. I know that this is just one tool in a shedful of other tools that I will need to accomplish my weight loss and maintenance goals. Now I'm reaching out to the WLS community - online and locally - to shepherd me through what I expect will be one of the greater journeys of my life.