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One of my very best friends happens to be a boy, well a grown man, but even at 39 he's definitely a boy!

Anyway....we talk about everything, literally.  Always have.  Well, based on some of his "advice" with Rob, I was beginning to suspect that my friend was beginning to have more than just friendly feelings towards me.

I love him in a big brother kind of way, he knows that, but he's suddenly throwing off lots of signals and its just bugging me.  So, I asked him and yup, I was right.  He tells me he's just biding his time....he's hoping Rob is dumb enough to let me go so he gets a chance.  What the hell.  Yep, thats right folks, he comes right out with this...."I'm banking on the fact that Rob sure sounds like a player and will get tired of you once he knows he has you.  He is the type that likes the chase and once he is certain he has you, he'll get bored.  Then I'll be right here to help you through it and you'll fall for me"  Once again, WTF!

I didn't want to deal with it, so I just called for a topic change...which we do when we don't want to talk about something.

Why does this happen?  We had decided right from the get go that we wouldn't do anything to wreck our friendship, we have such a great time together, but I don't feel anything for him romantically speaking at all.  He's my friend.  

Ok....I spend 8 years with a drunken ass...find this fantastic new friend and meet Rob and now I have the friend all professing his fricken love?  Geez my life can get complicated so quickly.......I must have pissed someone off at some point.

Or whatever it is!

He called me last evening, we're chatting away (about 5:30ish) about our days and what we'll do that evening and long story short I go to his place.  There about 6:30ish.  

Regular evening for us, lots of talking, watch a little tv, see something and suddenly we're talking about something again!  He made me dinner!  Stewie McMuffin!  YUM!  Only had 1/2 of it, but once again he wraps up the rest for my lunch today!

So, normally on a week night I leave his place by 9:30ish.  Last night he says, "hey hon, are you spending the night?"  Umm, no, why.  Well it was 10:30!  Oh crap!  I said well, I have to be responsible and go home, but I wish I could.  Tommy would freak out if I weren't there if he woke up in the middle of the night and being 15, if I weren't there first thing in the morning he'd go ahead and play hooky from school (heck who wouldn't!).

I could tell he was disappointed..."damn, I like having you next to me at night"  How cute is that!  And there's no hanky panky this week due to my little visitor being here, so its not like it was for ulterior motives.

So, I was a good girl and was home by 11!  Yikes!  Went straight to bed, didn't even change my clothes...I hadn't realized I was that tired until I got home.

Then this morning at work I realized I hadn't asked him how his invention meeting went yesterday so I called him on my midmorning break.  He always leaves his phone in the car when he goes in to meet with his clients, so I figured I'd just leave him a msg.  

Well...he answers so we chat, I ask him about his meeting, then he's like well I'm working with a client right now, so I'll call you later, ok?  Oh geez.  

So, there he is, mister lets not get too attached, bringing his phone with him and even when he sees its me, answers it when he's supposed to be with a client!  

Can you believe it!

This is really fantastic!!!!!  I'm getting wayyyy too attached to this guy.  Oh well, if it feels good!!!!!!

Well, I didn’t talk to him at all yesterday.  I left him a voicemail this morning that if he’s out driving today to be careful and if I don’t talk to him before wed (tomorrow) good luck at his appointment.  (he’s going to see a patent lawyer about an “invention” he’s dreamt up, good grief).

So, he calls me back little while later….sorry I didn’t call you last night hon.  I didn’t get home til 11.  Then I get a 6 minute long explanation about where he was!  I said you know I like that you want to tell me this stuff, but you know you don’t have to explain yourself to me, I care but I’m not your mom, so if you don’t want to tell me you certainly don’t have to.  He says, I know hon, I like talking to you and telling you what I’ve been up to.  (alrighty then)

It was no fricken big deal, another buddy is breaking up with his girlfriend and needed someone to talk to, so they hung out at his garage (car repair place) and the guy ended up spending the night on Rob’s couch. 

He’s like wtf am I? Stewie’s Motel?  I told him apparently he can’t say no, and his friends know it.  He said his buddy was all, I’ll just sleep on the couch.  He’s like, no fu**** way man.  When Tina comes over I don’t want your ass hanging around!  HA!

 So, he said he’d call me later or you know you can call me too.       (((ssiiggghhh)))

Thats how things are going with Rob!  Saw him last night.  He loves it when I lightly run my nails over his back...we can sit like that for hours while talking. 

Last night he commented that if he could come up with an invention to do that he'd be rich.  Then I said, well gee why would you need me then?

He gets all serious and looks deep into my eyes and says "Lots of things, hon" and gives me a little kiss.

God he's good!

Puppies now have their eyes open!  They are so darn cute!

Tommy is doing good in school, not getting the grades that I would like to see, but at least he's not getting into trouble...but hey, he still has 3 1/2 yrs of high school yet, so there's time!

My school work is really suffering at this point.  I gotta get it together.  I think I need an antidepressant or ritalin or something...I just can't focus.  My sister says its cause of Rob, so does my step-mom, but I'm not so sure.

Anyway...thats all for today!

Not to be negative, but if Rob & I stop seeing each other I have a lot of crap already in my life that touches him in some way!

Photos here, on my screen savers at work & home, next to my bed.

Good grief I do really jump in head first!!!!

Things are progressing nicely in my life. In most areas.

I found a wonderful man, that for right now meets my wants & needs.  I say for right now to try to keep things in perspective...its only been 47 days!  Although I have already fallen in love...not the fireworks and lightening bolts kind, but the soft, comfortable easy kind!

I've made a lot of new friends since moving to WI in March of 2007.  And although I complain about my sucky boss, I do like my job and the people I work with.

The parts that aren't going so hot are my own fault.  Primarily my schooling.  I just am having a rough time focusing.  I am considering stopping for a little while, but won't until summer.  I'll take summer off to regroup and figure out how I want to proceed.  I can't really afford to start paying back the loans, so I will have to stick with it, but I'm getting burned out.   Oh well, I'll get over it!

He called before lunch....just to hear my voice!  I really am enjoying this!  

I think he's becoming smitten!!!!!

At his place this weekend he mentioned forgetting to send in his turkey stamp so he could hunt for one this year.  Turns out it was due the day we first talked on the phone.  So, I told him that, oh really.  I promised next year I would remind him to send in for his stamp...he thought for a minute, took my hand, looked deep into my eyes, said "thanks hon" and gave me a wink and a kiss!  God he's good!

Funny what a difference a week makes!  From bootycall patrol to cared about...he even said he realized how I must be feeling like bootycall material and he felt bad about that and said that just wasn't the case!

And the weight loss is continuing!  Life is good!

Well...he had to call me last night "just to hear my voice"!

It was late, about 10pm.  He had totally forgotten that he had to attend a restaurant association dinner last night, so within a few minutes of getting home he called me..."hoping I wouldn't be asleep yet".

((sigh))

Saw Rob yesterday....I think he's more than smitten with me!

We watched the playoff game together with a couple of his friends at his house...we had so much fun!  They were really nice.

He and I also had a long talk....he finally said it!!!  He really Likes me and Cares about me!  His words!  Things are moving along at a comfortable pace.  His big worry that I'd want to live with him, and I teased him that maybe some day, not anytime in the next year.  We talked about so much stuff.  Its weird, but even though its been just 42 days since we met it actually feels like much longer.  I think because we spend so much time talking to each other when we are together.

As time goes by I think if nothing else I'll have a really good friend in him.

I think I might be falling in love with Rob!  I know he cares about me as a friend and maybe a little more.  Its way too early.  Its only been like 36 days, but since my wls surgery I don't believe in letting the grass grow under my feet anymore.

I won't be telling him anytime soon, but I feel like the cat that ate the canary!  Its a wonderful secret to have!!!!

My weightloss has been a little stalled this week, but my batteries are also low in the scale, so I'm not quite sure what I weigh.  I have to get them replaced.

With all the distraction of this new relationship my school is suffering...I have just a few weeks to get my act together and get it caught up and done!

I can do it!