August 2006, started my journal with wls. I went to my pcp and had a physical. She talked to me about my weight again. I had not seen her since I gained all the weight back that I had lost on Weight Watchers (70#). I just broke down and told her I can lose the weight, but can not keep the weight off.  She said maybe I needed to talk with someone about it. She sent me to my first psychologists appointment.When I arrived there he seemed confused because he only counsels people who wanted wls. At that time I knew only a little bit about wls. He sent me to a group for women called, Healthy Living For Women and told me that might help. Ha! Ha!. The group had nothing to do with weight issues. So I started looking into wls. The more I read the more I thought this might be for me. In the meantime my pcp had sent a referral to the Bariatric Surgery Hospital within my HMO.  That was at the end of August 06. I was told about the website my HMO had and started going there and reading the stories of the people who were waiting for the surgery and people who already had the surgery. One of them mention this OH sight. They said it was the best sight out there. So I started reading the stories from so many of you since August 06. I was more than thrilled when I found out that there was a group for 50+. I was afraid to start chatting because at the time I did not know whether my HMO was going to approve me. In November they called and said I would have a psych eval. I went to that and they told me it would be four weeks before I heard anything. They assign each patient with their own team. My team would all get together and go over the best way to treat me. I received my approval on Jan 09,07, stating I had an orientation class that I would attend. It will be an all day class. At that time I will learn what I have to do. I will be weighed at that time and that is my start weight. They require that you lose 10% of your weight before you can have the surgery 

When I got married I weighed 122# and thought I could lose a few pounds. Then I had my first child and stayed at 150 for several years. I had my second child nine years later and  weighed 232 when I delivered him and keep that weight on for three years. I went on Weight Watchers the first time in 1986 and lost 100#. I had to have emergency gallbladder surgery and the surgeon told me to quit dieting that I did not need to lose anymore weight. Will that was just what I needed to here and gained all the weight back and then some. In 2004 I started back to Weight Watchers and lost 70#. I had a really bad experience there and left. I thought that would be a place you felt protected from the looks and laughs of other people but I was wrong. There were two older women in that group both of them only needed to lose 15#. As alot of you know when you lose 5# at Weight Watchers they give you an award. When I had lost 50# they started in saying my god you have lost 50# meaning and your still that fat. I went to my leader and asked her if she could give me my awards after the meetings because of that. She said no because I was inspiring to so many for losing that amount. She said just to ignore them. Will the night I received my award for losing 70# they both gave out a big laugh. I had to stand up and get the award trying to hold back the tears. I had people coming up to me and telling me not let them bother me, but it did. That was the last night I went to Weight Watchers. I realize now I allowed that to happen to me. I gave myself away that night. I gained backed the 70# and that is when I went to my pcp. I have learned so much from all of you. I hope I can learn alot more and be able to help some of you.



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May 16, 2006
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