gingham1021

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Are you ready for it?? Get this!  I bought an outfit at a department store!  I walked into Kohls, tried on a size 24 and IT FIT!  I ended up buying 3 pairs of pants and a shirt.  I haven't been able to shop anywhere but Catherine's and Fashion Bug for so long, I didn't even know what to do.  I hugged my best friend in the dressing room I was so excited!  I even called my Mom to tell her.  She was so happy for me.  I have been in a 32/34 or 30/32 for so long- I never thought it would happen.

I am down 75 pounds in 4.5 months- YEAH!  Loving my sleeve right now.

Seems like at 3 months I had another sizeable stall.  It was about 2 weeks that I didn't lose anything (maybe longer).  Then finally, I started dropping it.  I am now down to 306.  That is 72 pounds since surgery!!  Yahoo!  I feel like I can eat a bit more now.  I have to watch myself to not eat too many of thing that go down easily.  For instance, I could eat peanut butter crackers (the sandwich style)- about 4-6 of them at one sitting.  That makes me nervous.  I have to start choosing better foods to snack on.  I hope to post some new pics soon.

I am now down 60 pounds!  I don't ever recall being less than 333 in MANY years and I am actually 319 now.  I teared up the other day thinking I could be in the 200's in a very short time.  I haven't been 2something since high school.  The weight has been coming off fairly easy lately.  I eat a bit more and that keeps my metabolism going.

I bought a Wii about 3 weeks ago.  I bought the Wii Fit too and I had to laugh because the weight capacity was 330.  I didn't even think to look at that and come to find out I didn't make the cut at the time.  I was too fat to get fit- how is that for irony?  Anyway, I just got back from vacation to Cape Cod and I can now exercise on my Wii Fit!  How exciting.  My first real NSV.  I really like the step aerobics part of it.  I did two levels and a "free step" game they have.  I accomplished 926 steps in 10 minutes- the goal was 800!  Now that is counting 2 steps going up and 2 steps going down- so really that is only 231ish times stepping onto the step (wii board.)  It makes exersizing fun.  I can't wait to get on there tonight.  Maybe I am a workout queen and I didn't even know it!!!

 

How exciting!  The last few days have been great.  I started eating a bit more and it seems to have gotten my metabolism back in order.  I lost 6 pounds over the weekend and 2 pounds yesterday.  Yahoo!  I am down 45 pounds since the day of surgery and 52 since my pre-diet.  I am now 327 which is 5 pounds less than I ever remember weighing in the last 10 years or more.  I had lost weight with Atkins once and was 333 but that is the smallest I remember in a long time.  And now- I beat that!  I am so glad I decided to do this.  My back doesn't hurt as bad anymore and my knee stopped bothering me altogether.  Yeah!  Starting to finally notice my clothes being bigger.  I'll have to get some new pics of me soon.  Stay strong everyone!

I fnally lost 4 pounds! Yahoo- maybe it is working for me.  haha

I am so frustrated.  I just looked at my calendar and I have been the same weight for 18 days (and I am only just over a month out of surgery!).  This weekend was so hard not to try and eat more than my little portions- but I did it and survived without tons of great food over a holiday.  I come home expecting the stall to finally be over and I am the same - STILL!  It is so hard not to feel extremely down right now.  Everyone else is losing so fast!  And I am not a "lightweight"- I should be dropping quickly right now.  Ugh!!!!  

I have lost 32 pounds so far, so I am happy with that- but the scale hasn't moved in almost a week.  I just hope I am not the first patient that loses only 30 pounds and is done.  I am very impatient.  I am trying to realize that amount of weight coming off in such a short time is awesome- but when I don't see the scales move and I can hardly eat anything- I am worried.

The diet hasn't really been that hellish.  I have only thrown up once and I knew better than to eat that last bite- I was full but wanted more- and look what happened.  I kinda describe it as feeling like I just ate Turkey Day dinner all the time.  I am so full!  I am drinking an Atkins shake in the am, water all day and then sugar free fruit or pudding and soup for dinner.  Am I doing this wrong?  I'm frustrated. 

I can't believe I made it through the surgery.  I told you that I was a bit morbid before hand..  One of the first things I said to my bff is "I lived".

I am now one week out of surgery and feeling pretty good.  My doc came out and showed my family my excised tummy- I now have pictures *thanks Nikki for taking a pic of yours*.  Doc said that I am actually pretty small on the inside so the surgery went "better than expected".  That kind of scared me at first but now I am happy about it.

Well I have been on Atkins for 4 days now and I am finally getting used to it again.  It takes some time to really get into the groove of things.  I was so tired for the first 3 days and now I have more energy.  I was telling my best friend that my stomach feels smaller and that my clothes are fitting better and she reminded me that I had so many more a-ha moments like this to come.

Things I can't wait to experience:

1.  Not worrying about restaurant seating- making sure the booths are big enough.
2.  Getting to wear clothes that are on the clearance rack at regular stores- so much cheaper!
3.  Being able to walk without pain... Enjoying my basement that I hardly ever go down to since my knees hurt when walking the stairs...
4.  Seeing old friends and having them be shocked at my new appearance.
5.  Not being on so much medication- 6!!!
6.  Fitting in airplane seats better.
7.  Not being controlled by food.
8.  Saving money since I won't be loading up my cart with so much food and eating it way too fast so I have to go buy more.

Things I'm scared to experience:

1.  Feeling left out when my family is enjoying their meals (dining out is a big past-time for my family).
2.  Feeling "exposed" since many people know that I am having this surgery- what if I don't do well?  Will I disapoint anyone (especially me)?
3.  Getting more attention for my weight loss/body than I do for just being me.
4.  Finding out how people really thought I looked "before".
5.  Going through all of this and still not being happy at the end.
6.  Will I have to get a 2nd surgery later because I didn't lose enough with the VSG?
7.  Life without comfort foods.
8.  Having no more excuses for not doing things that I have always wanted to do. 

I have also seem to become a little morbid- thinking about writing out a will and last letters to people just in case something happens to me.  Does everyone go through this??

Sticking in there and trying to be calm about all of this...

I just got back from a vacation to Orlando, FL. Had a very relaxing time.  I didn't do much- just lazed around by the pool and got a tan.  
Back to reality...

I now have 17 days left until my VSG surgery.  I have already purchased my "Any Whey" protein powder, vanilla protein powder, chewable calcium citrate and my chewable multivitamins.  I started the Atkins diet today to start shrinking my liver.  I have been on Atkins before and did pretty well- so wish me luck.  

I am also in the process of selling my house- am I crazy or what?  I have a lot going on right now and I am feeling very overwhelmed.  Hopefully writing in this blog will help me talk some things out.  I would love to meet as many friends as possible- we can all help eachother through this.