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I went for my psychological evaluation yesterday. I was kind of nervous about it. In the past whenever I have to talk about all the bad things that have happened in my life, I cry. After going through therapy a few times, I have learned it's OK and normal to have emotions, and to feel them. So I'm OK with crying, I just didn't want to do it while being evaluated for mental stability.
 I think a big part of my anxiousness was that I didn't know what they were looking for, so I just had to go in there and be honest...what a concept.
The therapist was wonderful. She was encouraging and positive and was able to address some of my fears and worries. She told me she thought I was the perfect candidate. When we talked about what my goal weight was, I told her I had been afraid to set a goal, because I wouldn't ever get to a "real" goal. It had been so long since I was under 200, I had made that my goal, when in reality I was hoping for 125 to 150. She told me I would now be able to reach my real goal. I left there feeling excited about the surgery, because I am actually going to get my life back. For real. wow.

I am 54 years old and have been battling my weight for about 40 years. In high school I took "diet pills" which were amphetamines. In college, I took "speed", later on I went through all the diets, some successfully, some not so much. I have finally reached the point where I have worked out all the stuff in my head, and now my body refuses to let go of the weight. I can't exercise because I'm too heavy to move, and I can't lose weight without exercising. At 54, it's no longer about looking cute in a bathing suit, it's about getting my health back and living my life. So my cardiologist and my primary care physician are both in agreement - weight loss surgery will help me.
I am in the gather-all-the-documentation-for-the-insurance stage. I go for my psychological evaluation on Friday and meet with the WLS team on the 15th to discuss my options. I believe the request will be submitted to my insurance at that time. I am feeling rushed and pushed as this is the last year my insurance will pay for the surgery, so it's now or never. So to speak. Actually, it's now or pay-for-it-myself, which just doesn't sound as good.
I have had several surgeries in my life, most minor, one majorly major; and I never thought I would be contemplating voluntary surgery. It's a little scary and a little exciting. The thought that I can actually attain my goal weight, my real goal weight, it very exciting. I've started a list of things I want to do when my weight is no longer a deciding factor:
1. Go hiking - real hiking, out in the woods, up hills and over rocks. Hard work hiking.
2. Climb a rock wall. Now that I've written #1, this one seems kind of silly, but I still want to try it. Maybe I should do this first.
3. Take trapeze lessions.
4. Take dance lessons
5. Run
6. Play sports with my nieces and nephew
7. Ride my bike on the Katy Trail to another town. And then to the next town, and then the next, until I've ridden across Missouri.
8. Take a kick-boxing class
Man, if I could do all that, life would be sweet!