Peg G.

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OK, here I am again.  The last 3 months I have gained another 8lbs!   I'm depressed and back on meds. I am now convinced this is the reason for my depression. I'm distgusted with myself for not being stronger to lose what I have gained.

I'm now going to make another appointment with the surgeon to further investigate my fistula and what can be done.  I won't lie, I'm scared of the operation and scared of regaining!

Well, here I am once again. I made a return in January making all kinds of committments to myself.  I followed through on some, but not on the most important one.........GETTING BACK ON TRACK!
The quick down and dirty facts: 
*RNY in Boston 11/2006.  (open) got an infection with dehissence of the wound, got the FLU first week home
    tough recovery for 3 months
*Starting weight 275
* 9 months out down to 168
*Weight today  202
*Joined a gym
* about a year and a half out, started to experience some stomach pain and pulling.  Saw Dr., had tests and they found a Fistula of the staple line.
*Referred to another Dr. who tried to close it Endoscopically with clips and glue. Done twice...failed twice.
*Was told no need to worry unless I started getting more pain or started to gain weight.  Both have happened about 6 months ago.
*Went back to the Dr. He put me on an FDA approved appetite surpessant. And I met with the Nutritionist 
*I felt good about the changes. Even joined W.W.
* Felt I had things in check, but the scale just wasn't moving.
* Lost my motivation, was ALWAYS hungry and was making the bad food choices I had done previously.
* Haven't seen the nutritionist or Dr for a script refill because the pills didn't work and i had to pay out of pocket for the NUT.

So, here I am, giving this all another shot.  The thought of surgery has me very frightened.  I've been told that the ROSE procedure would be perfect for me, but I have not heard very good reviews on it. So, I'm going to make this my sole priority to see if I can't get things moving in the opposite direction, before I am told I will have to have a revision.

The group I have joined seems to be very helpful and in the same situation as myself. I hope to gain knowledge, compassion and a good "listening group" that I might be able to vent to!

Please wish me luck, say a little prayer for all of us that are on this journey. I will surely do the same for you!!
*

I did something today that I have never done in my 38 years of marriage............................No, nothing that would ever hurt my family. I spent $800 on myself dr something I have been wanting since High School.     PERMANENT HAIR REMOVAL!   Might not sound lie sucha a big deal to anyone, but to me it is huge. I have always had lots of unsightly facial hair that I had to deal with. I used either depilitories, razor,or plucking one by one  (ouch!)  I tried electrolosis, but it was too timely and was not working out as well as they thought it would. So I discontinued after about $600 worth of 20 minute treatments. What a big pain in the butt this ahs been my whole life, not to mention the embarrassment.

So, today I made an appointment and had a consultation with a vey reputable business, and to my amazement, I signed the contract and began treatment today! This was by far out of character for me because my husband and i have always discussed large purchases before we would make a final decision. Not because we wanted to get each other's permission, more so just a courtesy for one another. He's a great guy and has always made sure I had whatever I needed or wanted for that fact. 

As soon as he got home from work, we sat down for dinner and I began explaining what I had done for myself. He was very happy for me and never blinked an eye about it. He knows that this has always been a great conern of mine. I am sooo blessed to have a good man like Mike, my High School sweetheart. What a great Valentine gift.  Not the Laser hair removal..............the reminder that I have a great man and the gratification I felt when I signed that contract!

Oh, and I lost 2lbs!!

Met with my NUT last week. We went over my eating habits and set up an eating plan for 5 small "meals" a day, between 1200 and 1400 calories.  I have been trying very hard to get used to this schedule and keeping track of my calories. Hasn't been easy. But I have noticed that what I thought to be good porions, were way off track. I don't think I was getting nearly enough Protein and I have been eatng way too many carbs. Keeping track of everything helps me to realize my overages and shortages. Another good habit I am putting in place is weighing my food. I've only lost a pound or two, but I am happy to have stopped the steady rise in weight gain. Got to work on the head games I play on myself.

Well, I'm still struggling with my carbs. Been doing prtty good, but then there was the Superbowl. No excuse. I set myself up for failure. I made a decadent dessert to bring over my daughter's house for the game. I knew I was going to eat it!  I have lost maybe 2 lbs in 2 weeks. I won't com[plain because at least I have stopped gaining! I see my NUT and Surgeon on Wednesday. Onward and upward! Oops! I mean downward!

  My title is way too dramatic!  All I need is a little help with my avitar.  If I remember correctly, there was directions on how to do it on this site. Is this correct?  Keeps telling me the pic is too large.

I'm trying to get my page up to speed wih everyone elses. Can't blame a girl for wanting to keep up with the times!
Thanks in advance for any ideas or suggestions.
Peg G.     1:30pm

Well, here I am. 2yrs and 2months out. Thought I knew it all. Had a few complications, but all in all I've done ok. I lost 110lbs................Until about 6 months ago when I figured out I could eat sweets and greasy foods without dumping!  I slowly started eating "slider" foods because strangely enough, I got nauseous everytime I tried to eat meat, fish or chicken. So finally, the surgeon sent me to a specialist to have a barium swallow test. Well, more good news. I have a small fistula in my pouch. I have had 3 upper Endoscopy's to try to close it with clips and surgical glue. Yep, glue!  That hasn't been succsessful either. So my choices are: do nothing, see another Boston Dr. who performs a new procedure Endoscopically where he sutures it shut, or have a RE-DO.  My surgeon says my weightgain is not from the hole. He says it is too small. So if in fact that is true, I should be taking advantage of this "headstart" that I have been given and get back on the horse that got me here!!!!!  I need to gather up the confidence once again and follow the rules of the game. I have an appointment with my NUT and I am going to start attending the support group that is offered by my surgeon. I learned a valuable lesson..........I DON'T KNOW EVERYTHING THERE IS TO KNOW ABOUT   WLS !!!!!

Thursday---- 1-18-2007

Well, I've been kinda slow at getting my blog up to date. There ahs been so much going on with the holidays and all. Not to mention that I have a wound dehissence. That's when your incision splits open and drains all kinds of yuk. It happened 3 days home from the hospital. I am being treated by the Wound Care Center at my local hospital. They have a Visiting nurse come each day to debreed,clean,pack with some special stuff, then dress the wound. It was really nasty and had infection. I was on a strong antibiotic and it seems to be working. Dr. Randall had to cauterize one of the holes that was pretty deep. The wound center is very happy with the progress it is making.
And if that isn't enough to keep me hopping, I got that bad stomach bug that has been flooding all the ER's.  Diareaha (sp) , vomiting, fever.chills, and severe nausea. It landed me in the ER because I was dehydrated. Got a couple of IV bags and some meds for nausea and was sent home about 2 in the morning. It took about 3 days to clear out.  I'm back on track again. Forcing my water and trying to eat protein heavy meals with veggies.
Lots still going on, so I am going to concentrate on each step I make. I want to start moving forward. I need to exercise!!!!!!
Well, thats enough for now. I hope to post next when I have a more positive attitude. I've lost about 40 lbs thus far.

November 28th, Tues. (my late Mom's  B'Day) miss you Ma.

I'm calling today "TOUCHY TUESDAY" because I am letting my emotions get the better of me.  I think I am going to go out and pick up the last few things at CVS that I will be needing. I also have my hair appointment at 3:30pm. Got to get rid of these "skunky" roots! :)  Then I'm going over my son's house to play with my 2 Granchildren, Aaron and Hannah. They brighten even my darkest days! I need to get my fix of hugs and kisses to last me the week!! My husband and I will then go out for something light for dinner. Tonight I will try to relax and go to bed early.  
I think tomorrow will be known as "SHAKEY WEDNESDAY". I'm sure I'll be a mess, but will try my hardest to keep busy. Maybe go out and by myself a new comforter set for my bed. Something to brighten up my spirits when I return home!
Everyone has been marvelous to me on the boards.  It's so nice to be able to share!

Sunday, November 26

Been a while since my last  Blog. There have been so many things that just happened to come these last few weeks. Well, this was the first year for my daughter and her husband to host their 1st holiday, Thanksgiving.  They did a wonderful job. Especially with everything going on in their lives right now. Joy had to work on Thanksgiving, so she didn't get home until 4:30pm. She is an RN. They also just found out that her husband Greg's mom has breast cancer and is having a partial Mastectomy...................on the same day as my WLS. They aslo found out this past week that Greg's Stepfather was just diagnosed with advanced Alsheimers (sp?)

Both our surgeries are on Thursday, and they have had a Hawaiin vacation planned for sometime now. They leave on Friday. They are torn on what they should do. I told them that I would be upset if they cancelled and that I was thankful that I would see them before they left. Greg's mother also feels that way.

Getting a special blessing at church tomorrow. That is a big comfort to me as I have been away from church for sometime now.  Trying to work everything out.

So, 4 more days and I will be on the loser's bench! I would appreciate not only a prayer for myself and my family, but also for my Son-in-laws parents during this tough time.  Thanks so much.