hope4change2012
"You look tiny." Are you talking to me?
Dec 27, 2012
Without getting up and moving my comfy little dog, I'm going to guess on how many days post op I am. I think I'm at about 34 or 35. I've had the well documented Post Op Blues. It's not all the time, just my natural propensity to look at the negative had reared it's ugly head. Well, in my defense, I was bummed with my boobs drooping and my saddlebags re-emerging, but both are greatly improved from what I walked into surgery. As I've said before, excellent results from surgery means a 75% improvement. I believe I had excellent results, just was unrealistic I guess. Not a stretch for me, that's how I roll and it's caused me heartache in every area of my life. I even think my obesity was a result of perfectionism. I couldn't look amazing so I gave up. I'm better in that area thank God, but I still notice it from time to time and then back off.
I went back to work on Monday. I hadn't seen many people since many were off for the holidays. Yesterday I did and although some, hopefully most, don't know that I had cosmetic surgery their response was very positive. I think if someone knows you had plastics, they might feel like they should say you look great.. It's the ones that haven't seen you in awhile that really count (at least to me). And having said that, I got lots of Wows... Some friends hadn't seen me in months so there was just the generic weight loss factor too, but that combined with Dr. S sculpting, they were surprised how I looked.
My favorite comment was from a co-worker who saw in the hallways and said: You look so tiny! ME? Tiny? Haven't heard that for years and years and, well forever and a day. I actually heard tiny from a couple of friends, even a "sexy" came out. It felt good. It actually helped me settle down about what I don't like and accept the good in all of this. What is interesting to me is that I'm wearing 14's and I think that's as good as it gets. My hips are that big and I can't pinch any fat from the largest part of my hip. I have friends that are 0. I was hoping to get out of the double digits but I don't think that's in the cards. I'd was thinking a 7/8 or 9/10...I can squeeze into an 11/12 on some things, but I'm done with the battle with the scale and pant size. I look fit and in some people's eye: tiny. Yikes! And Yeah!
As I've said, I can't believe I did this surgery. I'm grateful to be post op. I accept the aging process. I really do. This will be it. As you know, we continue to age the day out of surgery so what was lifted is starting to fall: darn gravity. However, as Dr. S told me the day before I left: You've been given a 2nd chance. It's so true in so many areas of my life. I'm grateful.
On the recovery front, I'm still in love my garment. I feel put together. I know some hate theirs. It has loosed up and I wonder if I need a smaller one, but at 100 a pop, I think I'll accept what this gives me. I did invest in post op foam from contourmd dot com. I have seen a few, but not many, on the benefits of foam after lipo. It makes your garment tighter in those spots and aids in healing. I don't want the added inches while in public, but I did do it at home. As I write this, I'm inspired to add them again. I only used a couple of times, but want to add at night. My face bumps are going away little by little. I'm grateful to see the progress. I have rather odd looking long lumps behind my ear down my neck about 1 1/2 inches long, but they are even on each side and Dr. S told me about that being part of the healing from the neck lift and pulling up some wrinkles. Well then, I am all about pulling up some wrinkles and I'll call that good. I'm trying to massage, lightly, my entire body, 3 minutes per spot, 2x a day. I have to put a timer on or I'll cut it too short. My face I try more often. It still feels weird to have the numbness, but that is going away little by little. The improvement in my face are so subtle and so natural. I'm so glad I did it and glad I didn't do a bunch of other stuff. This was plenty on the face. I look at celebrities with money to buy the best in the business and they look like freak shows. Dr. S is all about moderation and I believe in plastics, it's the way to fly.
My body scar is doing great. It is staring to get flat. It's still red in color but chaging a little bit day by day. I use that paper tape and initially help it stay on with other medical tape. It adheres and stays on for days. I was concerned about how long you leave it on, as in is it moisturized enough and sanitary, but I've seen people leave it on up to 10 days. I'm at about 4 and then take it off. It literally stays adhered that long. The bewbies are healing nicely too. The under breast scar is the harder one. I did invest in mepitac silicone tape as Not2L8 (i think that's her handle) suggested. It's better on that tender area, but still a little annoying. I bought some kelo-cote siicone gel to apply to my under chin and behind my ears. I have moments where I itch like crazy!!! I sort of massage/itch the area and it passes thank God.
I'm also back to exercising, but very minimum. I'm doing the 20 minute brisk walk/1 mile as is recommended after surgery. I look forward to that. I've missed that component of my life. With the holidays I tested the all too familiar waters of overeating. One thing about the garment is that it's so tight that you are uncomfortable if you eat too much. I do log my calories and am trying to stick around 1200, but hit 2000 with some xmas indulging. I don't feel good after a lot of sugar and that is a new and great thing. I can look at sweet things (and most of the time) say to myself either: I know what that tastes like, I don't need to try it. Or, I know how that makes me feel. One bite can lead me down an overeating path that it's well worn and quite frankly not welcome any more.
I am taking great care of myself. I took the Pre and Post Op Make Me Heal vitamins. They were overpriced as some say, but prepackaged and worth it. I've now switched over to an even more expensive vitamin, Primal Blueprint Damage Control Master Formula. They are $125 for a 30 days supply, but I used them before when I was healing from something and I believe they helped. I also love this guy's website, marksdailyapple dot com, and feel like I'm getting an excellent product. I hope I'm not wrong. Any way, I'll take his mega doses 2x a day for 30 days and then then next round, 1 packet a day and after that, cancel it and just add what I need. I accept that although I'm looking and feeling better, there is still a lot going on inside that I can't see. My body needs my help. It's been there for me so I'm "showing up" for it with lots of water, exercise, rest and good food. I'm pretty much eating primal/paleo: meat and veggies with eggs, but no dairy. I love jello and although I'm still hooked on the chemical ones, sugar free, eventually I'll move to knox. Here's the great thing about it. It actually is still primal, but most importantly, it helps with skin laxticity. I have 20 more pounds to lose and didn't have surgery on my arms. I'm hoping with exercise, slow weight loss and gelatin, that my skin will shrink somewhat nicely. We'll see, but that's what I'm hoping. Unless I win the lottery or write an award winning screenplay, I'm done with plastic surgery. I have done enough and tapped my emotional and financial life enough over it.
On a final note, I'm hoping to stop all of the self-aborbtion that plastic surgery has led me too. It's important to do your homework, do proper research and excellent care afterward, but it's a great big world out there with a lot of pain and suffering. A dear friend just lost a child in a car accident. My 'plastics' and heartbreak drama pales in comparison to her grief. I am so glad I did this, so glad it's over and am so glad to get back to real life and what really matters.
Til next time...
