Jessica S.

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I cant believe I havent posted in a year. Well it has been a year of struggles. We finally left Australia and moved to the UK. I finished my Italian studies, Visited 6 countries this year and even got to spend time with some family over this past Christmas/New Year ..which is a very big blessing that hasnt hapepnd in over 10 years. What a great year..but it has alaso been sad times..we have finally come to grips with our unseccessful attempts to concieve, and giving it a few more months of different tactics before we actaully begin to apply for adoption. Its a hard decision but hey its life right...
I also gained weight..HATE HATE HATE IT....but I am trying to learn how to live and be happy. I got up to about 98kgs. But now have tried to not diet but to eat healthy for the most part. Right now I am about 92lbs after thsi new eating plan of 3 weeks. I lost a bit then gained abit so about 3 weeks ago I was about 96kgs and now I am about 92. I am really hoping to be about 80 kgs before I head off to a wedding in Italy in Jun..I dont know ..but hey thats only 1kg per week. Shoudl be doable if I am doing things right here..not sure..
I am currently eating about 1,000-1,200 calories a day...and i have to really push it because I just dont want to eat in the day...I dont knwo if that is stauling my weight loss but hey I just only want to eat at night. Not ot mention I dont sleep. I only sleep about 4 hours a night..at about 6 am is when I get tired. then I sleep till about 10 or 11. Well sometimes till midday..but that is on a good day. Then I do nothing all day long. I think maybe I should try to find some sort of hobby to get out of the house and some sort of activity..or even get a job..I dont need to work but sitting at home doing nothing doesnt help. The good thing is I dont sit at home and eat..I just watch tv!!!
Anyway thats about it for now.

oh i know why now..because I eat whatever and whenever i want and I no longer exercise...
I cant believe im back into this situation again..
up to 92 kgs..not looking good.

well I'm back after being away for so long..I am going to try and remain regular on the board..I just get so distracted as well as turned off by negativity..but lately have been encouraged by a few people.

At the moment I feel as though I am not where I need to be. I have always been so good with the eating side and just not so good with the exercise side..and now since I am too tight I eat whatever ..and whenever i want when I can...most days I'm eating one meal ( a few bites of it) and chips and ice cream on the side because its all I can get down...Do i know this is wrong..OF COURSE I DO...
but when you put together the fact that its all I can eat..and my stress and anxiety that comes along with it..

I think I have just forgotten what the goal is all toghter..not to be thin..but to be healthy..I got into this because I didn't want to live an unhealthy life any longer and when I made the change I was doing so well..I cut out breads...except for the occasional pizza (hey I'm with Italians everyday!!) and pasta...and i cut out sugar...only one day a week we could have sugar in our house...and i cut out potato's.. The only bad carbs we ate in this house was low carb tortillas when we ate Mexican food, sometimes we ate basmati rice but in a small amount maybe once a month..and then once a month the husband was allowed to have cereal. Since we are also vegetarians we basically lived on veggies and protein supplements.

When I receive my unfill I hope to get back where I am meant to be.
We are now eating fish, dairy and eggs so I am looking to continue eating that and sometimes we venture over to eating chicken if it is free range and all organic..but this is very rare..

The hardest thing is when we are with the Italians..its very hard to say no to them..especially when we are at their restaurant every other day..since they run it and work 24hrs..haha..thats when we get to see them..but they were very helpful the last time when we said we were on a diet ..so they allowed us to only eat once a week!! Can you imagine ..asking if you can NOT eat at someones restaurant for free! Its insane...

anyway enough with my ramble..just thought I would update..I'm working on these last 15kgs...

Not to mention a lovely lady has started a new challenge on the Lap Band board so I'm going to give it a go before our cruise in two weeks...I hope I can stick to it..staying away from the pizza and gelato will be the hardest!

Wish me luck!!!!

ciao

well its been a long time ..and although we have finally ruled that the reason I have lost so slowly is that my band wanst tight enough I can safely say that it is too tight at the moment ...i can barely eat a full meal..but i woudl hate to go back to eating to much. I have scheduled an appointment with my doctor on OCT 15 as I will be going on a cruise in November for the first time and I would hate to not be able to eat anything. Anyway on the good side I have  lost 48 kgs...which is about 103.5 lbs...im very excited to finally be under 90 kgs (200lbs)
anyway still along way to go but I am really desiring to have a baby at this moment...I hope its safe to do so at this time..any suggestions or if anyone woul like to chat with me please send me a message..
ciao for now!

Well here I am again...weight still not dropping..why you ask...
well I just havent been very motivated..I feel as though I have given up in a sense but deep down I really havent..I want this weight gone so much. I want to know what it feels like to not be over weight ..or just a little over weight....to be a average size...ect...
Well at the moment I have fit myself in a size 14 jeans...just make sure they are the stretchy jeans..and well since I only wear the skinny style jeans anyway they usually come stretchy for that matter...
I would love to say that I can wear a size 10..but its not only the size that I wear ..its the shape of my body...i dont like the bulge that is above my stomach and so much want it to be a bit smaller.
Sooooooooooooo...what am I doing about it..not too much to be honest..
I have a personal trainer once a week and every time I weight in the scale just sits there..he tells me I need to change what I eat and attend the gym more than just once a week..this I know ..I use to be so dicipline and go 5 times a week plus one session with him..but once you stop its so hard to get back into the routine.
Sooooooooooooooo anyway...i also see a Natreopath and she says its because of the PCOS and the carbohydrates....but since I do not eat rice, or bread anyway (I dotn really like it on a normal basis) ....I have been sworn off my favorite foods
milk, cheese, pasta and SWEETS...she also wants me to drink lots of protein since I am a vegetarian and thinks that the issue is that Im not eating enough protein and too much sugar...She believes its my insulin resistance that is keeping me from loosing weight.. How can you take cheese away from an Ovo-Lacto Vegetarian...ciò non è corretta!!!!
and take away pasta away from the Italian lover ...morirei senza alimento italiano!!!
oh and did I mention I hate liquids..thats right so i only drink about 1-2 glasses of water a week...
I know...I know ...I know ...
Well maybe someone would like to keep me accountable..I hear it does help to have friends...and since I only have about 1 or 2 of them (and they are both skinny) ....maybe this is the real issue..hahaha

well thats all to say how ...
ciao  from down under

well so much has changed since I last posted.
I have not lost any weight and in fact have gained some weight..
I didnt have any fluid in my band for a while and we cant figure out why..but this was during the christmas holidays..and although we dont eat too much hear during that time..well I went to america and we ate like the americans for christams ..it was wonderful....and loved every minute of it.
anyway so that is the story at the moment..
Im having a hard time with eating the right foods and with PCOS and the intolerancce to dairy and carbohidrates..i really should be careful.but i just eat what i want ..when i want..and i can stuff my self silly with ice cream or cereal ..
so I think that is about it now..many prayers needed for this last 25 kgs to drop ( I think that is like 55 lbs or something like that)
yes I know it will be hard ..but I want it gone so bad..and since we just went into winter I have 4 months to get everything tightened up before the spring clothes reapear!

I have always heard about people very quickly in the beginning and towards the end the weight is harder to drop off...well I suppose this is the time for me. I have achieved my first goal of weighing less than 100kgs and that feels really great. Now my next goal is to reach 75kgs by October 1st...this will be a big challenge.  My end goal is 75kgs..which is a goo size of 165lbs..so I would be very happy with that...can it be done in 3 months..wow..thats nearly 20kgs in three months..some say I am crazy to think of such a thing...and just to be clear 20 kgs is about 44lbs...
My personal goal has nothing to do with my doctors goals though..my doctors goals for me are about 80 kgs...which I would equally be happy with as well.
anyway enough with the rambling...I'm now exercising at the gym 3-4 times a week and walking 2 times a week..I usually take 1 day off with no excercising...which has been very good for me..the last 5 kgs have dropped off in about 3 weeks and i do  believe will increase as soon and I change my eating diet..I have been eating whatever and whenever I want..the band is still working for me but I still eat the fatty foods ..because I know that I will loose through the excercising...is this a good way of thinking ...OF COURSE NOT...i'm working on getting out of this frame of mind..so the hubby and I are on a new low carb and high protein eating plan..to get a  bit of the naughty things out of the house and back to  to the basics of eating more proteins and less of the fatty sugary foods..well Ill have to report after the fortnight of this plan is over.
untill next time
ciao

Sometimes get really hard when you eat and cant stop..the reality is you can stop but you just dont..I know that I need a feel but I think Im so discouraged because I eat when Im actually full..Like I can eat dinner and be full but because there are yummy deserts around the corner so I will still eat the dessert..mind you its only a few bites.but because of this behaviour over the last two weeks I think my weight loss have come to a halt...I lost so much when i started seeing my personal trainer..but I do believe its time to step it up..so this week I made it to the gym another day other than my training day..so therefore Ive been twice this week..also we are going to the Eater show on Monday  so we will be walking about for a while...hopefully that will get the ole heart pumping harder...anyway Id like to make it to the gym two times other than the one personal training session I have a week...Id also like to drink at l east four glasses of water a day..you know for starters and work my way up..I only drink that much when I am at the gym and I am so thirsty when I go to the gym..I dont know why..Im also full for a longer amount of time when i go to the gym...so I figure..more gym equal I eat less food...more gym equals I  drink more water...more gym equals more weight loss...
Simple right

well there isnt too much to say these days...Ive lost a bit of weight but im afraid im going to stop loosing weight because I am having a hard tim staying on my eating plan...and nutritian say I am ment to eat like normal people just smaller portion..
but I want to loose the weight..urggg
Id like to be down to 97 kgs in 12 weeks..that would mean I would have to loose 16 kgs ..thats 1.3 kg a week...and 1.3 kg is about 2.86 lbs a week..
okay seriously not going to happen..but hey Im still going to try...

hey hey everyone...

There hasnt been too much new with me hence why I havent updated my profile.
I have finally gotten a fill that actually feels like a real fill and It is good to not be able to eat what I want, as fast as I want and when I want. So I have a bit of restriction which is good but the problem is the types of food I eat. I dont eat much at all..maybe a few bites here and a few bites there. Then some days I may eat about 8 oz of food...which the amounts are pretty ood but the problem is that I eat for dinner...because i am a chef I cook every night and its har to cook low gi which is what Im ment to eat since I have PCOS. but it is really hard in ausralia to cook healthy or enjoy food  with healthy alternatives. Like I really miss the sugar free popscicles...we only ahve the normal ones and althought they are not too bad I would much rather have the sugar free ones. We do have heaps of weight watchers type of things to eat and that is good otherwise we wouldnt have diet puddings and jelly (Jello as its called in america)
We only have a few carb smart ice creams in which sucks because I loved in america having the buter pecan carb smart ice cream..yum..
anyway my rambles of complaints of what we dont have in australia over america..I suppose I better get over it
Anyway thatnks for the prayers everyone ..always welcomed and needed in this house hold.
Untll next time
Cheers