KayBlahzay
CHEATER!!!!...... I Can't Believe What I did!!!
Jun 01, 2011
OK So I am very very very disappointed with myself! I was told to complete two weeks of my Optifast diet which consists of 1bar, 4 shakes and 1 soup per day and you are to consume no more or no less... well I am realizing today that I have not only been lying to myself but to my friends and family as well and I am sick with myself!
For the first week I was stellar, granted I felt sick and hungry and my mood was terrible but I stuck to my diet entirely then Memorial day came and everything crashed down terribly!!!
During Memorial day I was working the memorial day concert that aired on PBS and there was the most delicious smelling food ever served at the rehearsal for the Performing Artist and crew !!! It was SO hot out side and I was already feeling sick so I figured one small plate would not hurt so I indulged and it was awesome!!! The next day was the official concert and I did really good all day I froze two shakes even though the package said not to because I wanted them to be cold, I drank my shakes on time and everything went smooth until we went to the Banquet dinner that was held at the United States Capital in Statuary Hall... The food looked amazing and again I was starving its like the sun drained everything out of me so I had one small plate containing Fillet Mignon , Green beans and two cookies I mean when will I ever be able to eat in the Capitol again
??!?!?... WTF was I doing to myself and my success!!! well it does not stop there Monday I had a plate of leftovers from the cook out my parent hosted ,Tuesday I had Chick Fil-a and today I has 4 slices of pizza.... OMG I really cant believe I'm doing this to myself... Today is Wednesday and My Surgery is Monday!! I really need to stop this TODAY!!! I'm really feeling like a failure! I'm ready to make this change but I need to control my impulsive eating habits because I feel so bad after words and to top it off everyone keeps telling me how much weight Ive lost and in my head I'm like yeah right!!!i will do better because my life depends on it!!! I need to take a moment and realize what I am doing to myself!
