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 I guess Im like a child who left home, when you stay gone to long you forget your foundation. I am here to confess and progress. At my lowest weight I was 259, I had to have my band repositioned in April of 2011, I didnt get  fill until this month so, between that time I have gained over 40 pounds! I am back in the 300's I feel lazy more than defeated, one thing that was good about going through the long proccess of getting approved for surgery is the mental help. I know exactly what to do to get back on track and Im here now to get a real reminder. I think its funny how with no effort so quickly you could bounce back, I know one of my down falls was not getting a fill after the reposition. I didn't think at any point I couldn't gain the weight back, I just felt as long as I stay in the 200's im good. Well I obviously didn't stay focused I mean Im in the skip and jump back into the 200's but I know my most comfortable weight is definelty at 260. I can maintain it and even go smaller, i have a follow up appointment on march 12 and hope to get half of cc's in my band. I have 2 cc in now and can still eat whatever, I have gotten back in the gym and that feels good, working my way back to the no carbs, cream and sugar in the coffee and junk food. I remember exactly how I ate before and getting back there is hard. I am ready now maintly out of boredom and self challenges. I plan to blog more often especially after the 12th of march. 

Greetings all!!

I haven't been on here since July it looks like, well I can tell you why. In the three months I have been M.I.A I gained 26 pounds! Some might think thats not bad because it adverages out to about 8 pounds a month. Well I was having a field day, no fill  and was wide open, celebrated my 30 birthday but didn't do it like I wish I had. I had a fill on 9/27 and haven't been on the scale since then. I think I have lost some of the weight but not sure. As of today I am supppper tight, just getting over a cold and the TOM, last night I threw up pure acid from my stomach but felt so much better, it felt like it was just sitting there; so today I am on liquids (clear) and tomoorrow hoping that "mia" ( my band ) will give a little. I have a lot going on in my personal life but still manages to work our 3 to 4 times a day. Im looking forward to dropping 50 pounds by January 1st, buying a new truck and being comfortable in my new skin. I have taken pictures but need to uploade them, I will do so next month.

Whats going on with my band friends?

"sigh" taking the time to focus on my dating and social life, Ive gained 12 pounds, I was all the way down to 259, can you believe it lol. I know it was only because I was toooooo tight and the heartburn and acid reflux was to bad. Im going to the dcotor for a follow up on 7/13/10 I don't think im going to let her give me a fill unless it is very little. Im going to focus on my workout and get some water weight down so its not so bad on the 13.B In the mean time I have graduated from college with my BS in criminal Justice and waiting on a raise on my job. I should be happy right, nope! My focus was and I repeat was a mate and tire of being single, now Im done with trying. I have closed all dating sites, and I have been staying home except working out, work and random trips to take care of buisness. Im threw, my focus now is enjoying the goals I have accomplished, the fitness ones I will master and the new puppy im purchasing cause a baby is not an option right now.

Any in put is greatly appreciated, im going to post some new pics as well to, havent done that in a few months, I hope all is well and keep the faith and focus.

Hello all, I remember being so upset the last post because of the choices I made and how I fell off the wagon with being in shape and loosing weight. I am happy to report as of today I am a whopping 273.1 pounds, I am confident that I can loose the weight and be a solid 200.00. Yes!  I said 200, I come from coke bottle shape women being a single digit I believe will not compliment my bone structure. I have set a goal to be in the 260's by my son's birthday party which is June 19th, focusing is the key and faith unlocks the door :) Till June ladies and gents

Well, I went and had a unfill and have been having a party, I have been keeping up with some excersise but I have been out of control. Im going to see the doctor and have  a fill April 20th, glad for it because Im definelty not staying at this weight. Last time i was on the scale i was 286 which is far away from 371 where I started but im sure I have gained weight. Im anticipating the tightening, I stil have to learn to be diciplined when im not tight. I think if my doc put back half of what she took out, I should be at my sweet spot. I will update my weight gain next week when I come from the doctors. Pictures comming soon.

So, here is my March update, I was having some major issues last month after valentines day, maybe my heart was aching from being alone on the lovers holiday. I couldn't keep anything down from then up until today. I was forcing myself to throw up because my chest hurt so bad with some of themost simplest things I was eating. I ate brocolli and cheese soup and it hurt my chest so bad. I hadn't had a fill untill december of 09 and this was comming up in february. Someone didn't give some money to me they promised, I stopped talking to my SB( you have to ask in a personal not to find out what that is lol) I had issued on the job which Im sure contributed to me stressing and the band tigtening up. I couldn't take it this past weekend and went into the emergency to find out I had broncitius, this didn't help the coughing at night and the acid reflex. I decided to take some medication they gave me and wait it out. 'I couldn't wait anymore, I went to see my doctor today she gave me a slight unfill AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH relief! I felt better the minute I lifted up off that table hince my post lol. the only good thing about that fill from december is form december 28th to february 9th I lost like 13 pounds, then I weighted today and lost another 17 pounds. I told my doctor thats coool but forcing myself to throw up is not. I know the good and bad foods and still learning but I want to be able to eat and not have issues like the ones I had before. I am officialy 7 pounds away from losing 100 pounds, Yay me I think Im going to reward myself but don't know how, maybe a message, I sure could use one.

Hello all, I am pround to say Im officialy under 300 pounds!!!!! 295 to be exact, lol its a beautiful thing lol. I didn't get a fill this morning because Im good with restriction and didn't want to mess up a good thing. I have learned that throwing up can cause swelling which can cause discomfort , which can cause no eating. This beast or should I say band has its own mind, when its cool, its cool when its mad its mad. .....





Feeln great, working on my 100 pound goal by 6months, march 17, 2010

Good Morning, Afternoon, evening all,

Happy new year and season's greetings, my it has been since november since I have posted on here. I have been busy with work and kids and family etc, wait let me say kid lol just one. I have had I think my fourth fill in december on the 28th and boyyyy I can feel a complete difference. No more eating alot of proportion and the throwing up is more, Im learning to chose my battles with my food choices. I have been wrestling with the same 11 pounds up and down, I haven't been on a scale in about a month, lol my broke some strange kind of way. I have another doctors appointment feb 2nd, NO FIll for me! Im good, Im going to focus on meeting some personal goals and continue in my food choices, I don't get that much excersis but I don't drive to work so the walk in the evening and moring might be why the pants are getting loose, im waiting on my size 18 then 16. Im not looking to be thin im ok with being voloupuous lol, plesase send questions or comments if you like, I do want to stay proactive while on here.

God Bless!

new pics comming soon

Im mad at myself, no one else but me, I get on the scale last night and im 314, I started this journey 371 and I feel that I could easily get back there. Im mad that I have gotten the band but gaining and not loosing, wtf is that all about!!! I take responsibility for taking advantage of being able to eat things that I normally couldn't , I take responsibilty for slackn on my workout etc.... I don't want to sound like everyone else but I can't help it, I Messed up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Today, I am eliminating one of my distractions and focusing myself again, Ive come to far to just give up and go back to being close to 400 pounds, I will be at my goal next month, ( december 8th 2009) I will be in the 200. I am defininelty getting a fill next tuesday. mhhhmm, stay tooned for posting in December, my emotion is still anger, at myself and the food Ive allowed to be consumed by.

 

 

Till next month, don't be like me, stay focused.

So................... went to the doctor today and wasn't surprised about the scale numbers. I not only gained 12 pounds but I wasn't upset about this, why you ask? Well im prementral and I have been able to eat any and everything except bread, peanuts and brocolli. I went in for a fill, was not painfull at all, I remeber being on the scale at the house and saw 301 and then I saw 311 and the doctor scale said 313. Since having my fill Im ready to get the ball rolln, again im released to work out like I use to, People mess up and im not going to beat myself up cause I have lost 60 pounds with pre and post. Im ready to have my bottom half match my top half, my mini goal is to be under 300, that is 13 pounds away I CAN DO IT!!!!!


Be blessed my fellow loosers, remeber, " The race is not given to the swift nor the strong but to the one that endureth to the end."