Sour

Jun 10, 2009

Today has been a very busy and stressful day. I've been putting off some filing at work, because my filing system doesn't really work for me anymore and I can't decide how to reorganize it. Well, mid-day today, an accountant shows up to do an audit, and tells me he's going to go through some of my files later.

Now, I know exactly where everything is, but I don't think anyone else could find what they were looking for. So I spent most of the day cleaning up my files, so he can dig through them unaided. FUN.

In all of that, I didn't get any lunch today. I ended up snacking on some high-fiber crackers in the file room mid-afternoon when I couldn't take it anymore. I've got a lot of calories left for today, and I was only planning on a salad for dinner.

Anyway, tonight is my weight loss support group with my dietician. Last month, this guy who hadn't been there for quite a while walked in, glanced at me, and said, "Well, Lola's lost weight, but you look the same." It REALLY rubbed me the wrong way. First, because I'd lost twenty or thirty pounds since he last saw me. Second, because "Lola" (not her real name) has made it to goal before me and I'm terribly jealous. Third, because it turns out that the guy only came to support group because he wasn't losing weight, and fourth, because I am on a stinking plateau I can't break right now, and I didn't need someone rubbing my nose in it.



I doubt Grumpy will be at support group tonight, but I think it's interesting how that one, miniscule exchange has really soured my enthusiasm for support group. I'll still go, and I will probably have a good experience, but I wonder why I internalized that offhand comment so much? Why am I still wounded a month after the fact? What exactly should this be telling me about myself?

I really don't know.

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