Lori M.

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Nothing to update, had my scope and they were not able to cross through my pouch to view the small intestine. I have been feeling somewhat better, but still have bad days, so I need to follow up with my surgeon to ask about the next step (which I am almost positive is surgery). I am going on vacation August 11th, so I am going to put all this mess off until after that and see what happens. I have put all my trust now in God to heal me, I think originally I put too much stock in that scope thinking they were going to do it and I'd be miraculously healed with a dilation to that area. So now,  rather than trusting what man can do I have re-evaluated the situation and turned it all over to God (amazing how we forget to do that sometimes...thinking WE have it all under control). If I return from vacation and am still having these "bad days" I will go see my surgeon for more testing or procedures.

To reiterate, it's only a partial blockage and things move through ok, but some days I feel intense pain. I am going to begin journaling my food intake and BM's so I can see when exactly my pains are being triggered now to see if it might be certain foods that "rub things the wrong way"...
More later.  

It's been awhile since I have blogged, so I thought today was as good a day as any to update.
The last few weeks (since July 4th) have been pretty miserable to be honest. It all started with the 4th of July when for some strange reason I was a bottomless pit. I was pretty hungry that day and found myself returning to my fruit drawer and to the corn on the cobs quite often. I think in all I had one measly protein for the entire day. I had a small piece of chicken, but in addition to that I ate nectarines, cherries, an apple, and like 3 corn on the cobs throughout the day. I also had a small helping of some chips with homemade salsa, and returned later to the nacho cheese with chips. All in all I felt hungry all day for the first time since surgery. The next day I was nauseous all day long, and was unable to eat anything other than my protein shake. The following day (Friday) I started having some horrible cramping which I thought was related to girlie issues, but noticed on Saturday that it was happening after meals. Saturday night I was in such horrible pain that I sat in fetal position on my bed crying to my husband about getting me to the ER. We put it off another day and he massaged me to sleep that night. The cramping I was feeling was radiating around my left side and into my lower back. So Sunday rather than eat and feel pain, I just avoided food most of the day...I did eat some watermelon that night, but it's watery consistency fooled my pouch into thinking I was drinking rather than eating so I was fine. But when I woke up Monday with that "guts are falling out" feeling I had only felt right after surgery, I called my surgeon and asked for advice on what I should do. After hearing my symptoms I was told to go the the ER and that Julius (my Dr's asst.) would call and let them know I'd be coming. And, for the first time it hit me that this could be something serious. So I went, and after getting a CT scan of my belly we found out that I had a small bowel obstruction (partial) and was admitted. I was given some meds by IV, and told that it appeared from the CT scan that my pouch was actually swollen and was causing a back up in digestion causing food to move slowly into the small bowel. At this point it was still unclear without further testing exactly what was going on inside (could be an ulcer of some sort or possibly scar tissue from the RNY) but after a few days I was released and told to follow up with the WLS surgeon's Gastroenterologist for an endoscopy. The first few days out of the hospital were good because I was on a liquid diet, but a few days later after having gone to thicker foods, the cramping and pain were back. So I put myself back on a diet and went back to life as best I could. I have had intermittent issues since then with pain/ cramping and gas, and am still not having regular BM's like I had been prior to this mess, but I do finally go in for my scope on Monday 7/23 which is actually tomorrow. I am hoping it will be  a simple fix, because at this point I am ready to go back to a normal life. I can't eat in public anymore because I don't know how sick I'll be or what might happen after I eat. I can't take care of errands for more than a few hours because I start getting severe cramping from the center of my abdomen (near the diaphram) radiating into my left side and into my back with severe nausea. It's hard to guage when I'll start feeling ill, so at this point I'm just ready to get all this taken care of.  On the up side I have lost quite a bit of weight and even more in the way of inches...averaging atleast an inch a week in my waist, stomach, and hips for the last 3 weeks. But I would give all that up for a few more weeks if I could just feel good for more than 8 hours at a time.    Anyway, I will update more later this week after my scope.

It's been 4 months since surgery. I'm not losing as fast as some others are but am doing much better than I had expected at this point. My total loss is now 52 lbs. I am only about 10 lbs away from my next goal which is to weigh less than my husband...LOL...I am also aware that most of my problem is related to not eating rather than eating. I am rarely hungry and when I am hungry I'll have one of several scenarios that will stop me from finishing my food...either the meat will choke me, the flavor will make me nauseous (anything with too much flavor makes me sick), or I'll eat a few bites and feel just sick all over. I have explained it as somewhat of a love hate relationship with food. The things I think I'll enjoy eating will make me sick so I dread even trying to eat now. My portions are still pretty small and I'm usually lucky to get in 2 meals a day. For example yesterday my hubby bought me a breakfast jack from jack in the box and I ate a few bites and then the thought of eating eggs just made me sick so I stopped. I picked it up intermittantly throughout the day and during my 9 hours at the office ate about 3/4 of it, but I did go home last night and munched on some watermelon which sat really well ( considering it has no nutritional value). I know it's NOT good not to eat but I am doing my best to eat what I can. I promised myself that I'd start drinking protien shakes or something to make sure I'm getting a decent amount of protein in. So we'll see if that helps speed the loss a bit. But regardless, I am still happier than I've been in a long time. 
Some benefits I've seen so far:
My blood pressure is normal
I can sit in chairs without feeling the chair tight and snug on my hips
I can sit on the couch without taking a whole cushion
A whole new wardrobe
I can walk the mall without my feet killing me
I went to Schlitterbahn and never once got a rash between my thighs
Intimate times with my husband are much more comfortable
I like the body I see in the mirror (with clothes on)
I have much more self confidence
My children constantly remind me how much better I look (and show me off to their friends)
My husband proudly holds me close (although he never would have said it before I can tell he loves my new body)
This list could go on and on, but I'll stop here.

I feel great!

This week marks 3 months since surgery. The changes in my life over the last 3 months are too numerous to list, but to say the very least I feel wonderful. I still have to agree with everyone else that this is one of the best things I have ever done for myself. I can't thank God enough for allowing me to wak through the door and have this done.

I haven't done the best getting my excersize in since I was released to do heavy excersize at 6 weeks, but tomorrow I begin Jazzersize classes, and my hubby and I are weight training as well. I am finally in ONEDERLAND and can not wait to get to my next goal which is to weigh less than my hubby, and 179 will do that.

I kept forgetting to get my measurements before surgery so I took my first measurements at 5 weeks post op. Today I did my first totals in inches lost since 5 weeks and I am sure the number would be MUCH higher had I taken accurate measuremnts before surgery, but what I got is what I got...so here goes.

Total weight loss to date 45 lbs. 
Total inches lost (since 5 weeks post op) 14.5  inches
That's 5 inches in my waist, 4.5 in my stomach, 3.5 in my hips, 1 in my chest, and 1/2 on my thighs. 

I have noticed where my trouble spots are as far as inches lost and will begin to target those areas with my weight training. 

Until later....
See ya!
 

Today it's been 7 weeks since my surgery. I am feeling great, eating well, and losing just the right amount. As of today I am down 31 lbs. I am developing wings under my arms, but was released for weight training last week, so I am still trying to fit that in my schedule. I had my own little wow moment today. I had to put a belt on just to keep my pants up, and it hit me....fat people don't need belts...I haven't worn a belt in years...why would I? My stomach held all my pants up just fine on it's own. So today I am wearing a belt and it's my 15th anniversary with my wonderful husband. We are planning to go eat some Japanese food, yummy hibachi food from our favorite local resturant. I'll be sharing his of course, but I am sooo excited. It'll be my first visit to this returant since surgery, so I hope I don't get sick. I ate potatoes last week and they didn't make me sick, so life is GREAT. I'll check in later
 

Well I am down to 214 lbs now. That's a total loss of 28lbs in 6 weeks. I am eating well, but still do not "enjoy" eating. There is something going on in my head that says" food bad..tummy feels yucky" after I eat and it's really destroying all of my old perceptions of what food is/was to me. I used to enjoy eating certain foods, but now it seems a chore to eat and enjoy the foods I once loved. Just as they said, my food addiction has turned to scale addiction. I weigh myself atleast 3-4 times a day, but I use the scale as a tool, to monitor what's going on with my body. I feel good but usually tire quickly in the evenings. I am ready to begin weight training and hope that on my 6 week check up tomorrow all my blood work looks good and I'll be released to lift weights and do my floors (vacumming, mopping, sweeping etc) cuz they look treacherous... 

I was sick again last week (Thursday night) and through trial and error have found that potatos and my new pouch do not like each other, which is a HUGE bummer because me and potatoes... we're tight...I love my taters. Maybe God allowed this so I can replace them with something better for me. =/ I am feeling good though and other than weird gas issues and LOUD tummy noises I am really happy with the results so far. Finally into the 2teens (219lbs) I am excited. Can't wait to reach the 100's. 

I am feeling great. Life is wonderful, but I do tire pretty easily. I am doing great with my vitamins, but think it's the lack of having any protein or real nutrients in my diet. I go for my post op blood work in two weeks so we'll see how that turns out. All of my cuts are healed, but I had been having issues with this one spot on my left side. I thought it had a scab or something that was rubbing right where my pants hit my waistline. So last night I rubbed my hand across it and was like, ok this has been going on too long and low and behold I was like OH MY GOSH...I called my husband in and it's not a scratchy scab at all, it's a stitch from the inside of me that's sticking partly out of the middle of my cut. The incision is healed, but it's a bit irritated where that stitch is sticking out. The stitches on the inside disolve so I'm thinking sooner or later this thing should be falling out...WEIRD! Anyway, as of this am I am 220lbs...which is a 22 lb loss. MY husband has been noticing more and more and made a comment last night that made me feel so good....(it's initimate so I ain't sharing...LOL) My clothes are getting lose and I have some skirts that I am able to fit into again that I haven't worn in a few years. Next week I travel to my corporate office for an annual meeting, and am excited about that, but a bit nervous about eating while I'm there. So that's the latest update.

Tomorrow will be my two week post op anniversary. Here is the latest update. 
Surgery 1/31- My morning went really smoothly until they took me back for IV's without my family. The nurse had to try 3 differnt places and finally got my IV in my wrist which was VERY painful. They said they'd bring my family right in, but after waiting about 30 mins. wkth still no family in sight my mind was racing with awful thoughts. I was really really ready to back out, but in teh back of my mind, I still had some sense about me.  I was really worried about being taken in wihout being able to kiss him goodbye. Well about 5 mins before they took me back (only after I asked the nurse again to bring them in) my Mom and my hubby showed up. By the time my hubby walked in I was STRESSED and he could see it in my face. He immeditaly nealt by my bedside and began praying...something i had done moments before, but was at a total loss for words. Anyway, after his prayers and a kiss I felt better. And within mins they rolled me out. By the time I got into the OR, I threw up from the anestesia they were pumping through my veins. All I remeber was vomiting and them saying woah woah woah. My next memory was waking up after surgery. I felt good, but it took teh nurse two hours to bring my pain meds. OUCHIE! I did well and they sent me home the next day.
2/1-2/3 Pain was still pretty intense and pain meds. were life! I slept most days. Did plenty of walking per the Dr's orders.
2/4 Felt good enough to go to my son's scrimmage game for a few hours. Came home and slept for the rest of the afternoon
2/5-2/6 Caught up on rest and played on the internet. Felt fine, but a little sore after sitting for long periods.
2/7- Went back to work. Did fine... went to the Dr. in the afternoon and had my drain removed. Weight was 229. Down 13# Released to eat creamy foods and grits. I was absolutley excited about grits. Went home and had my first helping. Yummy
2/8- Over did it with the creamy soup at lunch and spent my afternoon vomiting at work and laying on a couch in a back office. Fear that I don't understand my signals yet begins to set in.
2/9 MY BIRTHDAY- it was a good day but fear of eating from the day before kept me from eating anything but my fluids.
2/10-2/13 Have been eating very small amounts of food each day. The Dr. only allows certain food sand since creamy soups made me sick I am basically only eating a serving of grits and some yogurt each day. 
As of 2/13 my weight is 225lbs. Down 17lbs. Feeling great and have plenty of energy, but getting very tired of grits and yogurt. Called my Dr.'s office and was told that maybe by next week I can try to slowly introduce soft foods, but its still too soon now. NO protien shakes they are too hard on the kidneys during a liquid diet according to my surgeon, so I am very limited right now.

That's my update so far...

Well I'm only 5 days away from surgery now. I am anxious. I went to the store last night and picked up my pain meds and some other things I'll need after surgery. I am preparing the office for my exit for a week. Unfortunatly I have an employee out on maternity leave and can't afford to leave my office for any longer than a week. Luckily I have a place here I can rest if I need to when return, so I should be fine. Speaking of office, my girls here are amazing. My birthday is Feb 9th which is just over a week after my surgery, and they realy made me feel special today. This morning when I walked into my office no one was at their desk which was really weird, and when I rounded the corner to walk into my office everyone was standing against the wall in my office and they yelled "surprise....happy birthday" and I was like...girls that's sweet but my birthday is still 2 weeks away... they had a chocolate iced chocolate cake with candles lit on my desk. They had the forethought to realize that I would not be able to eat a nice cake on my birthday so they made it for me today. What was a small gesture on their part was overwhelming to me. WOW! 
So I weighed myself this morning and I am down 5 lbs already. I have been trying to eat well. I don't have any special post -op diet, just trying to be cautious. The last thing I want to do is gain more weight before so it'll be that much harder on my after surgery. I have also been taking my vitamins twice a day and trying to get extra walking in before surgery so I'll have built my lungs up a bit. I am thinking of going this weekend to buy a new nightgown and a few other things for after surgery. Time is flying by now.