Emilie J.

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Well, my first blog, and the clock is counting down quickly. All of my preop testing is scheduled for the 3rd and 4th (my birthday!!!!) of June, and if everything comes back okay, we are looking at around the 16th of June. I can't believe it. I am terrified. Not so much of dying, though that thought has entered my mind, but of the changes after the surgery. Irreversible, and maybe I will be one of those people that can't tolerate a french fry, or a bite of ice cream for the rest of my  life. It seems so, so silly to be so worried about that, when my food addiction is what has brought me to this place, but, I still am very scared. What will I do without my comfort, my stress relief, my joy? I am hoping I can look back on this blog by next summer, and say it has all been worth it. I hope that I am not doing this for the wrong reasons. I hope to be a better mother, wife, and friend......I hope......