missmichelle78

Send Message

Block

Add Friend

Im not sure if I count the surgery day but if not then today is day 3. I tried quitting my meds yesterday, bad idea, I am just stubborn about taking meds and I hate the taste! I've been walkin and sipping and somehoe I dont feel its enough. I really need to count every ounce that goes in, im peeing normally which is good but im having to take tiny sips in order to get water in without pain.
Yesterday I broke down and cried, I think with not taking the meds like im supposed to and dealing with kids not understanding why I cant baby them and take care of their needs. They finally left me at peace, they are 15 and 9 for heavens sake! Bad mommy.
I dont regret it, i actually gained weight from all the swelling, amazing considering i have a body part missing and havent eaten anything in 5 days! But I understand thats just part of it, this is a process and will need a lot of sacrifice and work, it wasnt lipo or tummy tuck that I did.
This is the biggest surgery next to the c-section I had 15 years ago that I have ever had. Im a little freaked about what I did, and even the littlest pains from the iv site and the attempted iv sites worries me, he said the first 24 hours is when you find out if there are going to be problems. So I need to just relax.
All in all it was a good experience, the nurses at kaiser were amazing and my care was the best.

day one, no problem, day two, big slip, day three 680 calories, its 10pm and im not hungry!! Lots of water and protein, I just tried some cottage cheese today with splenda and cinnimon......mmmmmmmmmm so yummy. I have 3 more days until my surgury and I know I have to lose more by then, if I stick to it then I definitly will. I have been tracking everything I eat for the last 3 months on myfitnesspal.com which has been a great help, I wouldnt have lost this 12 lbs without it, and ive been practicing the 800 cal and post op diets, not perfectly, I was binging at night alot, but I think the practice is definitely making it easier now that im at this point. Im nervous about the surgery itself, the anestesia and possible complications, just living everyday as if it was my last, but I feel confident this is the right thing to do. My dr hasnt told me a goal weight or anything, kinda weird, im just going to do the best I can and aim for health!

Today was my appt with my primary so he could release me for surgury, Ive been bloated from PMS, constipated from the stupid protein diet and of course not sticking to it perfectly, so I was stressin on my weigh in because if I weigh in even 1 lb over they will cancel the surgery. So I get there and im 1 lb over! but the girl was so sweet and just put 170. what a relief, I have talked to a few friends who have had the surgery and that didnt have to lose weight or anything before and they both said "eat everything now!!" LOL I actually was considering it. I am really trying to get control because there is a mandatory 800 cal diet 2 weeks before surgery which starts for me next week. If I cant control it now I am going to have a super hard time trying to only eat 800 calories for 14 days in a row. Im nervous, not about the surgery but not being able to do that diet. Thanks gor for OH.

I lost 10 lbs in a few months, thats actually pretty good but now that im getting ready to schedule my sleeve im wondering if im making the right decision. I know its going to be harder to stay healthy and make sure I have my protein and vitamins, I cant afford to lose anymore hair. I guess im struggling with the question of "why cant I just control myself without it?" . I know its a choice for me and my husband to make, he is being supportive and I know thats what matters. I am still learning that I dont need other people's acceptance, I need to just accept myself. Most days im confident im going to move forward and then theres the days I am confident I wont. This is in God's hands, I pray that I chose god's will.