onechunkymonkey

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Here it goes~


I QUIT MY JOB ON FRIDAY! (under doctor's orders, after the fact! -
more or less)

I am so scarred that I will not be able to find an employer that
will allow me to take the time off to have weight loss surgery, heal
and do all the necessary appointments before & after the surgery. I
am so angry right now and I am angry with myslef. I can't believe
that I wasn't able to just hold on there a little while longer or
until after surgery.

This is so hard for me to admit but - I am a people pleaser. I want
everyone to be my friend and I do not want to let anyone down. I
hate feeling like someone is mad at me or that I have disappointed a
person. I want to be able to please everyone and make their lives
happier and less stressful. I want to be able to help them if they
are in need of help. I want to make a difference every day!

I was working in Corte Madera @ Paradise Foods as the A/P, A/R,
Sales, H/R & Payroll specialist. I had been working there for 6
months. I loved the work I did but I hated the management and the
way they handled any and everything.

Originally there was supposed to have two other people in the
office. This never happened. I was trained in 3 days and was never
told how to do anything. I was handed a binder and told "This is
what your job duties are." I not only managed to keep my head above
water, keep the office in funcioning properly but I did my job and
the jobs of two other people for over 5 & 1/2 months. I finally got
to a point where I felt like I was the office door mat. They were
taking advantage of me. They new I was a hard worker so they kept
giving me more work and less time to do it all in. I was told NO
OVERTIME was allowed but that I had to get all of the work done by
certain time deadlines.

They finally hired a Part time accounting Manager about 3 weeks
ago. They hired THE OWENERS BROTHER!!!!!!! I could not stand this
person from the moment I met him. He was rude, condesending and
spoke to me like I was a handicapped. Even though I could not stand
him, I loved the work I did and I stayed because the other employees
had no one on their side. They had no one to stand up for them or to
make sure that they were being treated appropriatley.

What ended up hapening was that I was requested in the owners
office. I walk in and the owners brother & the store manager (Who is
a two faced Bitch) are sitting in chairs waiting for me to arrive. I
ended up crying and feeling so bombarded that I stood up to leave
and he (the owners brother) tells me "We are not finished here, YOU
WILL SIT DOWN, NOW!"

I told him no, told him exactly how he made me feel, gave my two
weeks notice and left the office. I called my husband and he told me
to walk back in the office and quit. So, I did. I saw my doctor
right after I walked out and explained to her what happened and she
said that she would have told me to quit because my stress & anxiety
levels were so high that I started having panic attacks in her
office just re-telling the story. So, she assured me that how I was
feeling was normal and that I did the right thing. She also said
that alot of people do not realize it but STRESS can actually kill
you. This scared me. I would have kept working there and kept
stressing about how I was being treated.

So, now I will not only have to find a new job but find a boss who
is okay with me taking a month off>? I am so stressed about this. I
want to be able to work and provide for my family but I also want to
have this surgery. I can't start a job and right away start asking
for time off. So, what do I do?
Please help me! I have never been in this type of a situation.

I have my resume posted on Craigslist and I am
already looking for a new job. But, my concern is not that I will
not find work. My concern is that I will not be allowed to take time
off for my Dr appointments, the actual surgery & to heal!

So pray REALLY hard for me! K?

Thanks to all of you!

Rush headlong and hard at life
Or just sit at home and wait.
All things good and all the wrong
Will come right to you: it's fate.

Hear the music, dance if you can.
Dress in rags or wear your jewels.
Drink your choice, nurse your fear
In this old honkytonk of fools.


Living in the modern age,
death for virtue is the wage.
So it seems in darker hours.
Evil wins, kindness cowers.

Ruled by violence and vice
we all stand upon thin ice.

Are we brave or are we mice,
here upon such thin, thin ice?

Dare we linger, dare we skate?
Dare we laugh or celebrate,
knowing we may strain the ice?
Preserve the ice at any price?


When tempest-tossed,
embrace chaos.


Faraway in China,
the people sometimes say,
life is often bitter
and all too seldom gray.
Bitter as dragon tears,
great cascades of sorrow
flood down all the years,
drowning our tomorrows.

Faraway in China,
the people always say,
life is sometimes joyous
if all too often gray.
Although life is seasoned
with bitter dragon tears,
seasoning is just a spice
within our brew of years.
Bad times are only rice,
tears are one more flavor,
that gives us sustenance
sometimes we can savor.

So, I have been approved for my WLS. YEAH!!!!!! I am so happy. Now I can stop being so anxious and start worrying about the surgery.

Normally people receive their approval in about 2 months. I got mine in less than 1! (God knows how impatient I am. THANK U GOD for not making me wait any longer!) I have my Psychology Appointment on October 17th. If I pass my Head check, I will go through several other appointments.

The next one is a 5 hour apt. called Orientation. After this apt. I will meet with a Nutritionist. Then I meet with the Surgeon. Then I have to have Lab Work and an EKG done. If I pass all the tests, I go to a PRE OP Apt and I am told my surgery date.

This can take anywhere from 3 & 1/2 months to over 1 year. (The more weight you have to loose before surgery the longer it will take for you to get to surgery!) I have about 20 Lbs to loose. If all goes well, I will finish loosing before my Birthday. I want to have surgery in January. So, that is what I am shooting for.

I welcome everyone's comments and if anyone has any experience with WLS or with someone who has had WLS, Send me a msg. I would love to hear how everything worked out for them.

As of right now, I am saying YES to WLS. However, I can change my mind at any time during this process. So, I am an open book. A person who wants WLS but is not being irrational!

And, Before I get any responses or Messages please know this - I am researching my A** off about this surgery. I am not rushing into it at all. I attend A support group, I am a member of 2 online support groups and I ask lots of questions- all the time! I have also purchased several books.

(So, Please do not tell me I am taking the easy way out or that I am being irrational or that I could lose weight if I tried harder. Before you make comments like this, research WLS for yourself and learn a little about it before you stick your foot in your mouth!)

: )

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
(Hardly seems worth it)

If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
Now that's more like it!)

The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
(O.M.G.!)

A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes.
(In my next life, I want to be a pig.)

A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death. (Creepy.)!
(I'm still not over the pig.)

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour
(Don't try this at home, maybe at work)

The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.
("Honey, I'm home. What the...?!")

The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field.
(30 minutes..lucky pig! Can you imagine?)

The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.
(What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)

Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
(I still want to be a pig in my next life...quality over quantity)

Butterflies taste with their feet.
(Something I always wanted to know.)

The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
(Hmmmmmm......)

Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.
(If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)

Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.
(okay, so that would be a good thing)

A cat's urine glows under a black light.
(I wonder who was paid to figure that out?)

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
(I know some people like that)

Starfish have no brains
(I know some people like that too.)

Polar bears are left-handed.
(If they switch, they'll live a lot longer)

Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
(What about that pig??)

I am so anxious right now because I am waiting to see if Kaiser is going to approve my Weight Loss Surgery.  I never thought that waiting for up to two months for a response could be so hard.  I HATE WAITING!  For those of you who know me - You know how impatient I am normally, now picture me waiting for a reply that could change me for the rest of my life!  AHHHHH

My biggest fear is dying on the table.  I do not want to die on any table. I want to die in my sleep from old age. With this surgery there is a national mortality rate between 1.9% and 3%.

I could be told yes - I would do a very long happy dance!  -OR- I could be told no - I would cry and be so crushed.  My life would suck for quite a while. I could appeal a denial.  It takes longer but usually with one appeal and a letter from your Primary Care Doctor (PCP) you are approved!  YEAHHHHHHH

So, please pray for me.  I do not want to have this surgery if it is not God's will.  So, when you "Say a little prayer for me", make sure its like this - "Please let your will be done." not like this "Give Sara a YES LORD!"

I hope that this blog is understandable! I do not have any time to spell check it or to check for mistakes.  So - I hope you get the just of what I was trying to say!

 

SMILE :) Oh, And pray for me to stop being so anxious over the entire surgery situation.

 

THANK ALL OF U!