Mo Renroc

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 I haven't been on since November when I was given a date. That date changed 3 different times. My surgiversary date is officially January 23rd (2012). Yayyy!

Gotta say, it wasn't always a Yayyy! Lol! Surgery went well. I came home after 3 days. My room mate and I had to do breathing treatments every so often. We had to go walking around the floor. They took the tube out so we could urinate on our own. They didn't stress a bowel movement like they did when I had a C section 17 years ago. Surprisingly I was fine at home. I just knew the incisions would hurt and it would be hard to get comfortable. My daughter was very helpful.

I was so over fasting and liquids. So my head thought. I snuck a solid and soon KNEW different. That has been my biggest thing. Changing my mind. My whole way of thinking. Currently I go to a therapist with regards to Weight Loss. That will be okay for a while. But I wanna go back to my previous therapist just to work through other life issues that I deal with.

OMG!!! My biggest pet peeve is people that I know that have had WLS always reminding me of stuff that I already know. I am the type of person that doesn't need mothering. But folks always tryna mother me. WTH!? I am well capable of asking if I ever need to know anything about anything.


That is all for now. Hopefully I will get on a little more. It would be great to figure out how to post pics. So far I have lost 23lbs. Yayyy for me!!! 

 It has been a long time since posting. Sooo much has gone on since. My glucose levels aren't quite where they should be. But lower than before. I have had some good glucose levels. 

With alot of staying on top of my PCP and facility. Things got rolling. Got a call from WLS clinic and was given a list of things I needed to do AND MY DATE!!! Yayyy! 

DECEMBER 19th 2011 will be my new birthdate! I am so excited! Words cannot express how I feel!

But I still gotta have my monies ready. Gotta keep my weight and other things in order. So, if you are reading. KEEP ME IN YOUR PRAYERS!!!

 Boy! The process towards WLS can be sooo long and drawn out. Very discouraging at times. Then you get glimmers of hope. I did meet the surgeon a few weeks ago along with the rest of the team. This being my second try towards surgery. They are much more thorough covering all stops. That's a good thing. I think I will take advantage of the supports they offer. I would be lying if I said that I am not discouraged. Now, I am waiting for my PCP to send them my last 4 years medical history. While I am still trying to maintain a good blood glucose level. The nutrition piece went over some things that would help me be successful in my journey. Advising me to add excercise. My primary exercise is walking. Didn't do alot of that this summer because of the heat. Asthma acts up, not to mention because I take so many medications. I have to wear sunblock or my skin will break out in rashes (sun burn) something awful. So, I didn't do alot of walking. I decided to get back walking at least around my complex. I been down for a week now with Bronchitis. And Boy is it kicking my butt. Now I am in a panic because my weight was looming around 297 and 301. When I went to neet the team unannounced to me I had lost weight down to 289. That week I didn't eat much because frankly food was low. The nutritionist informs me that if I gain weight that would be grounds for cancelling my surgery. Not to mention I have to see their Physician to get the okay for surgery. Once again the glucose comes into play. That is the reason it was cancelled before. Their physician diagnosed me with diabetes. They told me then that once the diabetes was under control I could get in where I fit in. But I was so frustrated with the whole process and my insurance kept getting changed. I didn't muster up the tenacity to pursue it again until now.  Let me say that back then I purchased the food I needed to eat for 2 weeks and it was $139. Now they informed me that it cost $320. That they do not offer scholarship or program to help me pay for it. One of the main reasons I need this tool is so I can get back healthy and get back to work. I have a fixed income which is very little already. Idk how I am gonna come up with that amount. 

I recieved the package days ago. Idk what it is. I always read over things and put it to the side. I guess that I have to let things marinate. Also, I am busy getting my daughter ready to go back to school. It's like ai have to get one or two things out the way before I can focus on me. Is that adult ADHD? Anyhoo, I read it again and it said that I will need to purchase a 2 week supply of high protein drink for $320. That is a bit much. I still have the food from before. I wonder if they will let me use it? Doesn't hurt to ask. Because I definitely am. Lol! I hope and pray that everything falls into place. Because I am so ready to start LIVING and enjoying life again.  

I am nervous and excited! I got a call from the WL Center. I am going on Sept 1st to meet my surgeon. Same surgeon I had before my date was cancelled before. She said that I would be there for 5 or 6 hours. That's a long time. Hopefully it'll blow by fast. I am sure that it will. This blog is really good for helping sift through this process. She said that I would be receiving a packet soon. Wonder what it in it?

 I went to the doctor today. She finally gave me my referral. So I will be meeting my doctor/surgeon soon. Now I feel like I am making progress. Praise God! 

 This road started getting a little rough. I started getting a little discouraged.  Felt like I was never gonna get the process going. I met my bariatric therapist. She was very encouraging. For one thing she had WLS and understands how I got on this road. She gave ne a food journal and a book to read. I didn't start it right away. But once I did. It wasn't so bad. Still working on my glucose levels. It's coming along. Needed to add a little more exercise and keep my stress levels down. I am attending diabetes classes once a week and I am learning alot. Things that I can carry over to after I get WLS.

Oh Man! I keep seeing job postings that I qualify for. That is the main reason that I want the surgery too. To make a better life for my daughter and I. I pray that everything comes on together. Sometimes I wonder if this will ever happen for me. Last night I didn't dream that I had WLS. I dreamed that I had cosmetic type stuff done. Like on my face, arms, stomach & thighs. Yeah, I was doing some serious dreaming. Lol! I am still praying for patient endurance. When it is my time to bloom and shine. Nothing will be able to stop me. 

Today has been hard for me. Frankly, the last ten years have been. Moved to a new state where I knew no one but my relatives. Sometimes your own family are not good for you. I came here and started fresh. Tried to go on business as usual. Place to stay, found a job. Got a used car. At that time had a sitter for my child. Just going along. Then in 2002 I was diagnosed with Hodgkins disease. I resigned my job and did chemp and radiation. I wouldn't wish the pain I endured on my worst enemy. From that I survived. The one thing that kept me going was my daughter. I thought I would return to work right away. That was not the case. My body had to recuperate from the treatments. I gained a substantial amount of weight. As time went on other things started happening. I developed hypertension. I was always tired. Always in pain. 2 years turned to 5 and then now 7. I haven't worked in 7 years. I was diagnosed with Asthma, hypothyroidism, arthritis in my left hip. I began to deal with depression. I wasn't living in the best of neighborhoods. Social Security took away my benefits. Because according to their rules I am not disabled. I appealed until I wasn't able to appeal anymore. My daughter has had her struggles. I carried her burdens as well as mine. Everything on my shoulders is at times debilitating. I saw my once really bright and athletic daughter. Outgoing, fearless become a lazy, depressed teenager. She began gaining weight. I prayed about this thing. I realize that I need to gird up and take authority over my life and situation. Right now I am doing that by pursuing WLS. I need to get back healthy so that I am able to get back to work. I wanna live, I am tired of just existing. I don't have friends and family around me helping and encouraging me. I gotta be like David and encourage myself. My daughter is better in some ways because of our communication I am consistently talking and encouraging. But she has areas that still need some tweeking. It is my hope that this process towards WLS doesn't go on longer than need be. Because when I get my surgery and I have recuperated. It is my plan to start looking for gainful employment. Save and get dependable transportation. Take care of some other things. Save and I am relocating near my sister and her adult children that are more positive and helpful. Where I can be helpful to them where I can. My daughter can see a better way of being and living. I will have more people to bounce off of. It is my prayer that she takes all of her teaching, experiences good and bad and make something of herself.     

Philippians 4:6-13

King James Version (KJV)

 

 ⁶Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.

 ⁷And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

 ⁸Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

 ⁹Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you.

 ¹⁰But I rejoiced in the Lord greatly, that now at the last your care of me hath flourished again; wherein ye were also careful, but ye lacked opportunity.

 ¹¹Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content.

 ¹²I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need.

 ¹³I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.