SetPhasersToStun99

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LOVE this group. Some of the nicest people and they're super supportive. 

https://www.facebook.com/groups/283359835073015

I can't believe I've ignored my OH page for so long! :( I always said I wouldn't be one of those people who forgets to update, but I did! lol 
Life is pretty crazy/good lately. I love my surgery. It's still the best decision I've ever made. Hmm what's happen in the past three months? I've been going out a lot lately and drinking pretty much every week. :( I know I would've lost much much more if I hadn't been. I'm 202.5 though, SO CLOSE TO ONEDERLAND! I can't seem to get beneath that 200 mark though. I know if I start uping my protein/water and stop the drinking I'll get below it though. 
 

Weight loss has been pretty steady lately, which makes me super happy. I don't know what those little stalls were all about a few weeks ago. I'm just happy that I've been losing pretty much every 2-3 days. 
I went shopping yesterday and was happy that I could shop at REGULAR stores again! I was even able to fit into stuff from Rue21 and that's a pretty "skinny girl" store I feel like. LOVE IT. I wish my jean size would drop quicker, but I know it will evetually! 


AHH I'm just so happy. This is most defnitely the best decesion I've ever made. I just thank God everyday for blessing me with the opportunity to have this surgery.

*sigh* I've been drinking quite a bit lately and it's starting to worry me. Usually (pre-op)  I would just drink once or twice during the weekend, but lately I've been having a drink here and there more frequently. Friday night I had two glasses of Pink Moscato and I was smashed. The part that bothers me is that I was alone, it's not like I was social drinking or anything. I think I just wanted to get drunk cause I was lonely and sad that everyone else was out partying and I was at home watching Star Trek. :/ 
I had another drink today too (Sunny D and Malibu) and it's not even past 2. 
I dk. I think I'm gonna go back to my psychologist and talk to her about all this. I don't wanna become one of those people who develop a transfer addiction...I know I already struggled with alcohol last year for awhile, but I thought I had kicked it...
I dont know. I know I need to start talking with someone though. 
The weird thing is, I've still been losing though. Even more so lately it seems like. The dumb part of my brain keeps saying it's because of the alcohol (WTF BRAIN), but I know that's not true AT ALL. Ugh. Get it together, Sophia. :/ 

cw: 227.8
total loss since day of surgery: -21lbs

Already over a month out! It seems so crazy. I had my one month check out Friday and I was 233.2 by their scale. And then this morning I was 230.6 on my scale! :D 

Highest weight: 268

Consult weight: 265

Surgery day: 248.8

Total loss from consult: 34.4lbs
Month 1 total loss: 18.2lbs (my scale today)/ 15.6 (Dr scale Friday)

I'm having an issue kinda feeling like I'm not losing enough fast enough...but when I look at the overall numbers I'm astounded! I just need to start realizing that it takes time and I can't expect to just lose it all overnight. I'm so happy with my progress so far. 
I see it a lot more in clothes and stuff too. I have a pair of jeans from Vanity that are a size 34 waist and those are HUGE on me now. The lady at the store said they're about a size 16ish and she recommended I try a size 33 waist..which works out to a size 14 by their sizes. WHAT?! I was so surprised when they fit. I know Vanity's sizes run a little different than other stores, but STILL that is crazy sauce. lol 


 

I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm so stupid. I've been making really dumb eating decisions already...at only two weeks out. I had a little bit of my mom's chinese food yesterday...paid for that. Wound up in pain and had to throw up. Then today I fucking ate some chips....same thing. I'm so stupid. I wanna be successful, but yet I'm sabotaging myself already. I feel like crying. I wanna punch myself in the face for being so weak and ridiculous. I hate myself. I really do. 

I haven't even lost an ounce in 6 days. :( It's annoying, but I know it'll drop eventually. I just keep thinking, "Oh God I did something wrong. My surgery is ruined and I'm just the one unlucky person who'll only lose 12 lbs." -_- I know it's not true, but the pessimist in me is  crazy. 
I'm just gonna stick to liquids and not even start purees until maybe week 3. I just don't wanna jinx it. My mom said she thinks I'm starting too early and a few others have said the same. I agree. It's not that I don't trust the DR and NUT advice, but I just feel like this is what I need to do. Plus it's easier for me to get in my liquids and protein this way cause I don't have to wait 45 mins after eating and all that. 

So far I've had 1 popsicle (4oz liquid), and I'm having 8oz of Unjury Chocolate Splendor  (SO GOOD!) w. Lactaid milk (29 g protein! & 8oz liquid). So I'm doing pretty good already :) 

One week postop already! I seems like this week has gone by really fast and really slow. I guess because I'm not used to just sitting at home and not running around to work and school. lol I like having a break though. It was much needed. 
Last time I weighed myself at like 6:30 today I was 237.8. WOW. I have not seen that number in...years. Beginning of last year I think I was 245 and just climbed from there. So I haven't been this low in weight for over almost two years. INSANE. 
Highest weight (around beginning of February): 268
Start of liquid diet weight (Feb. 22. 2013) : 258.3
Surgery weight (Mar. 7, 2013): 248.8

Total lost from highest weight: 30.2 lbs! 

again...WOW. This is just crazy for me. I knew it would be fast, but I had no idea it would be this fast. Like I can literally see the change with my own eyes and I didn't think I would be able to so quickly. I can see my love handles going down and my stomach looks like it's shrinking too! It's been tough. I was in the ER Monday morning because I was throwing up stomach acid pretty much all night Sunday night. I think that's because I was really dumb and was laying on my stomach for almost two hours. (Dumb, I know) Right after that, I was really really nauseous and dizzy. Laid down on the couch thinking that maybe I was just getting a little head rush or something. But then I started dry heaving about a half hour later (2ish am). Called the clinic, they said to rest...uh duh. About 20 mins after that I had to run to the bathroom again and was dry heaving and this time actually started throwing up pure stomach acid. :( I felt way better for a little while and laid down in my bed and "slept" for about 2 1/2 hours.  (AKA laid in bed and drifted in and out while trying to ignore my nausea.) Then at around 5:30am I sat up and felt the heaves coming on again. Ran to the toliet, and this time I threw up like 5 times. It was horrible. That was the point where I was like, "I can't take this anymore, Mom. We need to go in." So we got ready and my mom drove me to the ER. They gave me IV fluids and meds and x-rayed to make sure everything was ok. They kept me there for about 5 hours. Thank God I didn't mess anything up by laying on my stomach this soon after major surgery. :/

So yeah. It hasn't been all peaches and cream, the way I thought it was the first few days home. I was really suprised at home good I felt and maybe I got a little too overexcited...I don't know if I pushed myself or what. But thankful I haven't had any more incidents like that. Overall I've been feeling pretty good. Only issue earlier on was when I was try and sip water I'd get TONS of gas in my chest. It felt like I really needed to burp...even with tiny tiny sips. It was horrible. Thank goodness that that's going away though and I've been able to drink a little better. I think the anti-gas meds that they sent home with me are really helping too. Other than that little issue, it's just been the random attacks of being super tired.
Like yesterday I tried running some errands with my mom. We went to Sears, then went to Bath & Body Works. I felt a little tired, but once I got to the car and sat, I was ok. Then we went to Home Depot, was ok at first but after ten mins I started getting that dizzy feeling and sort of nauseous. I had to hold on to my mom on the walk back to the car. :( Last place we went was the cable company and I'm pretty sure the lady probably was wondering wtf was wrong with me cause I had to keep laying my head on the counter. I felt really dizzy. Ugh. I'm a fan of that at all. It's almost the same as when I first started taking Phentermine and I would black out/faint.
I had one of those incidents today. Tunnel vision, rushing noise in ears then kinda sound dampening, then womp...pass out. Great. 
I'm pretty sure it's because I'm not getting enough fluids in and NO protein yet. I'm trying to do as much ice chips and popsicles as I can though because those of the things I seem to tolerate pretty well. I did have a little nibble of the cheese from a piece of my mom's pizza earlier, and I made sure I chewed it up really well. 
Hopefully I'll be able to start purees tomorrow when I go for my 1-week postop checkup. Pretty excited about that. 
Gotta say I really miss solid foods, but I know it's all gonna be worth it in the end! 

This is definitely the best decision I ever made. 

I got home yesterday at around 1230 in the afternoon. My pain hasn't been bad at all. I was so suprised. I had a little bit of bloating and pressure in my chest when I took my liquid vitamins too fast, but other than that I've been feeling pretty good. I noticed that I do better with ice chips and the sugar-free ice pops rather than the actual liquid water. I dk. I'm feeling pretty good though, and I hope I stay feeling like this. I'm just so happy to have it done and overwith finally. I'm still a little shocked that I actually got it. I've been waiting so long and it feels amazing to finally have it done and overwith and be able to start on my new life! :) 

When I got home from the hospital I was 254.2 (or something??) and this morning I was 248.3! SO CRAZY! 

Oh my gosh. Today's the big day. I can't even believe it! I'm leaving the house in about an hour and going to the hospital. I'm so excitied. It's so weird, I haven't been nervous at all about the actual surgery part...just more so about the afterwards. I just hope the pain isn't too bad. :/

Today is the first day of the rest of my life! (It sounds cheesy but that's exactly how I feel. :p ) 


p.s.: weighing in at 249.0! That's 14 lbs down since I started the liquid diet. HAI! :D