Joanna S.

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It has been a crazy couple of weeks.  I'm stressed to the breaking point.  Trying to get through school and starting a new job at the same time.  I am so tired.  I think I've been sleep-walking half the time.  Well, part of that ends tomorrow with graduation, but then  my job becomes full-time bright and early Monday morning.  And then a week later summer classes begin that I need to transfer to another college.  And then in September I'm starting an adult completion program for my bachelor's degree.  I have to find a balance here somewhere.  I've gained weight.  I haven't had time to exercise.  I'm not eating right and I'm missing vitamins and meds.  It's gotta stop!  I'm hoping I can get into some kind of routine starting fresh on Monday.  That's my goal anyway.

How my life has changed.  I started a new job a few days ago.  LOVE it!  I'm graduating from college with an AAS in Human Services in May and the place I did my internship with hired me!  I'm going on for my bachelor's degree in September while working full-time.  I never would have had the self-esteem or the stamina to do this without WLS.  I'm getting off of social security disability! YAY me!  Not a lot of people get to say that.  hummm.  I FEEL good.  I'm taking 2 meds a day instead of 15.  My blood sugars are normal.  I can see a change in my personality and my confidence level.  WLS does so much more for people than helping them to lose weight.  It gave me my life back.  I am so grateful and I promise myself every day that I will not back slide.  I will not screw this up.  I turned 47 just over a week ago, and I haven't felt this good in 25 years.

Obesityhelp is a good place to be because of the people on here who are going thru the same things and understand.
It means so much to come here when I'm feeling down and be able to vent and then have someone to commiserate with me.  Thank you all!
A s for my six month labs, I didn't get the results for a month because I missed my surgeon's appointment due to the weather, and they didn't call because the hospital didn't  fax the results to them.  Anyway, my B12 is a little low, my Vitamin D is a little low, and I need to up my protein.  I've upped my protein since the labs were drawn so that's ok.  My B12 shot was due when the labs were drawn so thats ok too.  The surgeon is sending a prescription strength Vitamin D.  Everything else was great! 

When everything is going well, watch out!  I was feeling so wonderful and doing so well.  Had a little jump in my weight loss and was down to 227.  Then BAM!  Fell and broke my tailbone.  Can barely walk.  Can't sit.  Certainly can't get on the exercise bike.  It's so darn cold.  There's so much snow.  My intership has been called off repeatedly.  I've been a slug for the last week.  Gained up to 231 in a couple days time.  Back down to 229, but who knows what tomorrow will bring. I've got a strange pain in my right upper side.  Surgeon's office says doesn't sound surgery related and to call the primary care doctor.  Primary care doctor is all full up and is only taking "same day appointments" which means I have to call at 8 am and hope my call gets in there before the dozens of other people trying to get a same day appointment.  geesh.  I'm just completely miserable.  

I fell at school Tuesday - indoors, and landed right on my tailbone.  My hands were full so I couldn't catch myself.  OUCH!I've had numerous back injuries over the years, but I've got to say that this is the worst!  I've been camping out on the sofa (sideways) with pain meds and a donut cushion.  Gained a couple pounds due to inactivity.  Miserable.  Not only does my tailbone ache, but I've got strange electrical-like pains all the way up my spine to the base of my neck.  The weather is horrible.  My house is a wreck because I can't bend over to pick anything up off the floor.  Kinda feeling sorry for myself today.

One of my goals was to get to the weight on my driver's license (230) before I have to renew in April.  I did it!  Feeling great! 

As of this morning, 100.6 lbs. lost! 

I wanted to be 100 lbs down today and only had a half pound to go, but I woke up this morning a pound heavier.  gah!  Oh well.  It has been a rollercoaster ride, with its ups and downs.  I only lost 5 pounds this month, due to a bite of this and a bite of that over the holidays.  I feel 100% better than I've felt in years - all except for my back, which is pretty much wrecked. 

What have I learned in the last 6 months? 
It's harder than I thought it would be, but it is worth it.

There will be people who are truly happy for you and then others who are just waiting for you to fail.

There will be people who will look elsewhere to put you down.  If it is no longer the weight, it is the saggy skin, or the fact that I had to have the surgery to make it happen for me. 

Carbs are still the enemy.  Some people can partake of them freely.  I am not one of those people.

I don't dump. 

I can eat anything.  I just have to choose not to.

I can eat more than what I'm supposed to.  I just have to choose not to.

There are all kinds of ways to "eat around" the surgery.  When I figure out one of them I don't do it anymore.

Protein helps me lose weight.  If I don't get it all in, I don't lose weight.

64 oz of fluid a day doesn't seem like a lot, but it is.  It is a struggle everyday to get it in.

It's easy to forget the vitamins and supplements the further out I go, but I try like heck not to.

It gets harder to stay on track.

Back from vacation.  Got on the scale and found that I've lost the .1 lb. that I gained over the holidays and that's it.  But that's ok.  I was away a week, without a scale.  I didn't count calories.  I think I got all the protein in and I know I got all the fluid in.  I ate in a different restaurant twice a day for a week.  And I maintained!  Back on track today.  Got lax on measuring my food so I'm going to get serious on that again.  I'm optimistic and very happy.

The scale has been up and down over the last 10 days due to a bite of this and a bite of that over the holidays, but I can say that today I'm only 0.1 lb heavier than I was on Christmas Eve.  I'll take that!  I'm leaving for Florida today, and it will be the first time I haven't been able to get on the scale every day.  I'm tempted to take it with me, but NO.  I'm going to go a week without it and see what happens.  I usually eat less and am more active while on vacation, so I'm hoping for a good weight loss in the coming week.  We will see.  2009 was a heck of a year for change.  Going back to school, having WLS. 

This is the first time in a long time that my New Year's resolution has nothing to do with losing weight.  This year I'm going to work on self-esteem, self-confidence, and assertiveness.  (It will help that I've lost about 100 lbs).  I'm going to work on how not to see a 300 lb woman when I look in the mirror.  This year I'm going to graduate from college and transfer to a university.  I'm going to make some inroads towards finding a job in my field.  I'm going to meet people and make a good first impression.  I want to do so much.