Losing support

Megans0988
on 4/23/18 6:34 pm
RNY on 02/20/18

I feel like I'm losing my support system, my husband works a lot and I can't talk to anyone else. I've lost 40 lbs but I feel disgusting, my husband always thinks I'm beautiful but it's not enough.

Writergurl08
on 4/23/18 6:50 pm
RNY on 02/15/18

Is there a local support group you could meet with?

HW: 340 SW: 329 Goal: 170

CW: 243

Surgeon: Dr. Kalyana Nandipati (Omaha, NE)

Megans0988
on 4/23/18 7:01 pm
RNY on 02/20/18

Yes but they only meet once a month

NYMom222
on 4/23/18 7:33 pm
RNY on 07/23/14

Why do you feel disgusting?

Cynthia 5'11" RNY 7/23/2014

Goal reached 17 months. 220lb Weight Loss
Plastic Surgery Dr. Joseph Michaels - LBL and Hernia Repair 2/29/16, Arm Lift, BL, 5/2/16, Leg Lift 7/25/16

#lifeisanadventure #fightthegoodfight #noregrets

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Megans0988
on 4/24/18 3:27 am
RNY on 02/20/18

I feel like I'm 20 lbs heavier even tho I'm not it's been hard to feel what I am on the outside

NYMom222
on 4/24/18 5:28 am
RNY on 07/23/14

You just had surgery so you are going through a lot of changes including hormonal. OH is always open. Spend time reading posts. When I first came here I went through hundreds of old posts. There is a daily menu thread that is a great place to connect to people.

Cynthia 5'11" RNY 7/23/2014

Goal reached 17 months. 220lb Weight Loss
Plastic Surgery Dr. Joseph Michaels - LBL and Hernia Repair 2/29/16, Arm Lift, BL, 5/2/16, Leg Lift 7/25/16

#lifeisanadventure #fightthegoodfight #noregrets

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sweetpotato1959
on 4/23/18 8:32 pm

Megans,

You need to stop being so hard on yourself.

You have got this! You have the instructions your team gave you. You have a Hubby who knows you are beautiful... and we can help by being one part of your support system here. If you can join the team that meets once a month that is good as well. There is a possibility you can connect with another of the ladies, who alos needs more support,... nearby and meet for "girl time" between meeting dates...

As each of us has begun, this journey we BEGAN a new life. We made a committment to the Dr we would follow those directions for the care and health of this wonderful tool, we now have to help us get healthy. We have a new life that comes with accepting our body changes whether they come rapidly or slowly.

40 lbs in 2 months is a good rate of loss. Yo need to be really proud of that. You need to consider, most people have swelling just after surgery and can go home heavier than their surgical sign in weight... There will be ups and downs of weight loss. Maintaining a diet diary will help you to determine what you need to do to maintain your losses and reduce the road blocks and bumps in the road.

You should focus on following your Dr's orders, directions for all diet and fluid guidelines. Do the exercise increases slowly and consistently... Of course your husband loves you and wants the best for you... being there by reminding you that you are beautiful is really improtant as you go thru the many changes that will come with weight loss...

It is so nice when you find your knees, and collar bone again..(smile)

Megans0988
on 4/24/18 3:26 am
RNY on 02/20/18

Thank you for the support, I'll try not to be so hard on myself.

Partlypollyanna
on 4/23/18 8:47 pm
RNY on 02/14/18

I am sorry you are feeling so bad; be kind to yourself while you go through all these new things...and also keep in mind that they say we can get crazy hormone swings during the dramatic weight loss period.

I know it's not the same as having people nearby that you can talk to but this virtual group is incredibly supportive and is here for you.

Hang in there!

HW: 306 SW: 282 GW: 145 (reached 2/6/19) CW:150

Jen

Librarian67
on 4/24/18 5:02 am
RNY on 02/28/17

I am so sorry that you are struggling. Weight loss is a HUGE change in so many ways. Your habits and practices change and your body looks really different as you lose what has been a part of "you" for so long. I too really struggled as my body changed and I often felt that it wasn't really me when I looked in the mirror. I couldn't believe that my wife still found me beautiful and when people commented on my changes, I just felt creepy. It really has only been as the months have pass being in maintenance that I have become more accustomed to my new body. I was I was MO+ for 30 years and all of a sudden feeling bones and seeing veins in my arms was difficult. I found that checking in on OH daily and exercising vigorously really helped me to adjust and get through the hard times. The exercise, while it may or may not have helped me to lose pounds, put me in touch with my body's new strength and abilities and helped me to be proud of it. Just my thoughts.

Hang in there and know that you are not alone!

HW: 248+, SW (RNY: 2/28/17): 244, GW (10/17): 125; LW: 115; 45# regain (19-20); CW: 135.6; new goal: 135; Plastics: Ext mastopexy, Ext abdominoplasty-5/18/2018; diagnosed w/ gastroparesis 11/20.

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