I just need to put this out there...(long rant.. feel free to ignore.)

I'm sick and tired of people talking down to me, my doctors, and my family because I had the Sleeve at 15 years old. It's really wearing at me. I've been blogging. constantly. Since I got a consult for WLS... I'm trying to help other people know they're not alone. I've had teenagers message me on facebook, thanking me for the blog.. Because there is absolutely nothing else online from the teenage patients point of view on this... Not just weight loss surgery, but any metabolic issue. So I know I'm doing the right thing. It's just really hard to deal with the negativity.. I get attacked online all the time from people. People trying to counteract any statement I make, parents that dont agree, blah blah blah.

Those doctors saved my life. My parents agreeing to let ME make the decision to have surgery, saved my life. And people say my parents are bad parents, and my doctors are ignorant, for allowing me.  It was my decision. If people are going to attack anyone, it should be me. But even then.. it gets tiring firing back at these people.. I feel like if I don't respond, then they win. It shouldnt be a win/lose situation.. because different things work for different people... But.. I don't know.

The only thing getting me through this right now is realizing.. If these adults are attacking me, they must be extremely arrogant.. And quite frankly, stupid. AND very insecure.. to be attcking a 16 year old who is just putting out there information, i'm not trying to sell surgery or say its the best.. I'm saying it's an option. And If you've tried every other option, teenagers should be allowed to have this option if the cir****tances are right.. Having most of your stomach removed isn't something anyone should take lightly. I certainly didnt. and if not being gluten free or vegetarian like peopel are suggesting were the only reason i was obese.. I wuoldn't have had surgery. It's not that simple.

Stupid people really get on my nerves... I get it everywhere.. I have peopel constantly questioning me and trying to make me feel stupid, even though I know i'm not.. Online and in person. and It's getting really old very quickly.. And I'm going to have to deal with this for a long time...Bleh. I know everyone that has WLS or anything even slightly questionable by anyone, they get **** I'm just getting **** not only towards me, but my family and doctors.. and the numerous friends I've made that also had/are having the same surgery..  Anyone I've helped, and anyone that has helped me. It's wearing me down. Ugh... It's been a long day... I need to find a better way to deal with everyones crap...

 Rant away - you are not alone. Just wake up every day knowing you are going to have a better life because of this decision - it will get you through. Whatever happens in life - you definitely have a bright future ahead of you - you appear to be very mature, and intelligent, so just keep on doing what you need to do!

I honestly think that people get jealous when you start losing weight and looking good so they attack your method.  If I had an obese teenage daughter and we'd tried every other option first, then I also would let her decide if this is what she wants to do. This situation happens with adults too. Since I've had my surgery my boss has decided she is going to have a tummy tuck. I overheard her tell a friend that she is the skinny, pretty one in the office and that's the way its going to stay.  The only people I ever even told was my husband and kids and my boss so that I could have the time off. I kept it to myself for the reason you're going through right now. It seems like even your closest friends can't be happy for you and all comments are negative. Don't let it get you down. Just keep on losing and enjoying life. Kudos to you for wanting to be thinner and healthier!!!

In my view, you are a very smart girl...and wiser than many adults!   I think it's awesome you are trying to support other teenagers considering this surgery.  Now-a-days, teenagers are getting all kinds of plastic surgery for vanity reasons, why not a VSG option, (which I think is a healhier choice than the other wls options out there) for someone as young as yourself?  You know yourself, your parents know you well and together you are well aware of your history.  You sound like a very strong, capable young lady.  Congratulations on taking this important step for your health.  In regard to the folks who are quick to judge, I'm thinking it's probably mostly out of their own fears and misunderstanding of wls.  I know I was afraid to do this when I heard about bariatric surgery years ago....and now I wish I had taken the leap years ago, rather than now.  C'est le vie!  I think it may be a futile exercise to constantly defend your decision.  Try not to judge them though.  Allow folks their opinions, but don't be swayed by how they feel.  Giving your power away based on what someone is expressing could be contributing to your frustration.  I wish you the best.  Stand in your choice!

 
Hey Ashley....

I read your posts.....and frankly......I am always impressed and really can't believe those words are coming from a 15/16yo. I think I was still kicking rocks when I was your age.....

You just keep doing you......don't let those people effect you. Shut them up with results and better health.

frisco

Hey pretty girl (beauty is on the inside first),

Just a quick note to tell you, welcome to life.  From here on out, you'll be living in the a world where some people never left high school (emotionally).  Stupid people are everywhere and they don't go away or grow up as you get older.  It's the way you handle them is what sets you apart.  My friends and I laugh that instead of being lactose intolerant, we're idiot intolerant. 

At some point you're going to either ignore the nay sayers, or become a  leading expert on teen WLS.  Personally, I'm hoping for the latter.  You are a smart girl with a bright future don't let the losers get in your head or bring your emotionals state down.  Consider the source. 

I am so sorry others are treating you like this Ashley. I think one of the main hangups adults have is they think that because you are so young you are not old enough to make big decisions like surgery. You seem very mature for your age and I truly believe you made a great choice in taking care of your weight problem so early on in life. That was very brave of you and I applaud you for that. I think alot of people your age would get weight loss as a fast fix and not be mature enough to eat right and excercise to keep the weight off. I do not see this problem with you. You seem to have a good head on your shoulders. As far as blogging and inspiring others keep it up. I'm sure you are touching others especially in your age range. There will always be haters that frown upon surgery. The truth is some of us need the surgery to get our lives and health back. Our bodies are so out of wack and our hunger hormones are so unbalanced that it is almost impossible to beat obesity without drastic intervention.

You are a strong girl and I am so proud of you. Continue to be strong and inspire others. I wish I was able to tackle my weight loss years ago. I can't tell you how many miserable years I wasted walking aroung obese. As far as the negative people just let it go in one ear and out the other. You did what is best for you and what they think doesnt really matter.

Take care - Shayne

If I could have done this at your age my life would have been so different.  I applaud you for making such a great choice.  Keep on rockin your sleeve girl.  You have done an awesome thing for yourself and don't let anyone get you down about it!

I was like you, very overweight as a teen. I waited until I was 50 to have WLS and I wish I had done it much, much sooner and saved myself years of misery.

I know people worry that a 15 or 16 year-old might not be mature enough to take proper care to be sure their WLS is successful. That's a fair concern but only the teen, parents and doctor can really know, not strangers looking in from the inside.

I think folks also have the "easy way out" mentality - like maybe you should have "tried harder" for a while (I hate that idea - like we're lazy slobs who just won't "try"). It sounds good, but the science says that WLS was your best shot. The right age for it was a private decision for your family and your doctors.

Your best answer is to smile, move on and let your success prove them wrong.

Rant away. I understand completely. 

One way to deflect the negativity, however, is to be very unemotional and calculated when responding particularly to the adults.  I haven't read your blog, and you may well be doing this already, but I'll put it out there anyway :)  People sitting behind the safety of their keyboards can be pretty 'brave' (much like drunks are brave), and a lot of the 'hating' that goes on is projection. People hate themselves and project their own issues an insecurities onto others to prove they are 'not alone.'  Nothing shuts it down faster than failing to rise to the bait. 

Science and logic are on your side. Don't be afraid to use that to your advantage.  For example, per the National Institutes of Health (NIH), only 5% of people who are Morbidly Obese (MO) can lose and maintain weightloss into the 'normal' BMI range long-term.  Even if you 'lost it on your own,' statistically you are more likely to put it back on plus some than keep it off. Rather than spending the next 10 years yo-yo dieting and doing irreperable damage to your body, self-esteem, etc., , you're intervening at a point where you can make a difference in the entire trajectory of your life.

Kudo's to you, and best of luck on your contining journey.