Had a scary, out of control day yesterday
I've got a lot of very stressful things going on right now, plus mad PMS, plus back issues. I've been slipping here and there with my eating lately (2# from goal so I think I'm getting more lax).
Yesterday I had so many unacceptable empty calories and junk I'm just ashamed. More than the shame is the SHEER TERROR that I could so easily slip back into the old me. I found myself hiding what I was eating in the kitchen from my husband. HIDING FOOD!
This is the first time I've had this fear since my surgery. I don't know what's going on with me but I'm just terrified that effing food still has so much power over me. I can't go back there. I can't.
I am so scared, y'all.
Yesterday I had so many unacceptable empty calories and junk I'm just ashamed. More than the shame is the SHEER TERROR that I could so easily slip back into the old me. I found myself hiding what I was eating in the kitchen from my husband. HIDING FOOD!
This is the first time I've had this fear since my surgery. I don't know what's going on with me but I'm just terrified that effing food still has so much power over me. I can't go back there. I can't.
I am so scared, y'all.
VSG on 6/22/11
Coming here to seek support today is a GOOD thing. There should be absolutely no shame involved.
Stress can get the best of us sometimes but the fact that you asked for help/support NOW vs 2 weeks of bad eating down the road is awesome.
I really have no advice for you to help stop it....but just wanted to say don't be ashamed or scared. I think this happens to everyone at some point. You will be ok!
Stress can get the best of us sometimes but the fact that you asked for help/support NOW vs 2 weeks of bad eating down the road is awesome.
I really have no advice for you to help stop it....but just wanted to say don't be ashamed or scared. I think this happens to everyone at some point. You will be ok!
For most of november and December, I felt completely out of control. The good thing is, I never let myself slip for more than 2-3 days at a time. Sunday is always my automatic reset day where I prepare for the week and figure out my game plan.
All I can say is recognize your issues. Work them out. Get rid of the excuses. There is hope - you can pull yourself out of this
All I can say is recognize your issues. Work them out. Get rid of the excuses. There is hope - you can pull yourself out of this
www.sexyskinnybitch.wordpress.com - my journey to sexy skinny bitch status
11/16/12 - Got my Body by Sauceda - arms, Bl/BA, LBL, thigh lift.
HW 420/ SW 335 /CW 200 
85 lbs lost pre-op / 135 post op
~~~~Alison~~~~~
I know the feeling. I think most of us still have some issues with food. I know I do! I have been thinking about certain foods so much lately and it's been hard so I've been having to pre-occupy myself with other things. It seemed so easy to resist the crappy food that I couldn't eat early on. Plus for me, it doesn't help that the weight loss has slowed to a crawl; it makes me want to just give in.
We just got to do the best we can. You obviously did something right, your ticker is proof of that. We don't have to go back to our old ways ... we are changing for the better. It is scary but we can do our best to control this. This forum offers great support.
Good luck with everything!
We just got to do the best we can. You obviously did something right, your ticker is proof of that. We don't have to go back to our old ways ... we are changing for the better. It is scary but we can do our best to control this. This forum offers great support.
Good luck with everything!
Jenn
WWBD?
I've had this happen a few times recently. I'm 8 to goal and some days I just 'want' where I didn't want before. I'm also a 'secret eater' and was bad with binges, before.
In my support group last night, we talked about it. I somehow seem to have a better hold on it than others. Why? Because I acknowledge it's an issue - just like you do. I think that makes a world of difference. Unlike the guy sitting next to me bragging about eating peanut butter on oreos and several slices of white bread a day.
I guess I just keep trying to do the reverse, I obsess about what I'm NOT going to do with food - rather than what I want to do.
This morning I had a slice of rum cake and 3 rum balls at work because we're having a total overhaul here which is emotionally exhausting for all of us. As a result, I went in this morning with the knowledge I'd do it. Preparing for bad eating... not so good. But, it allows me to keep the reigns tighter on myself.
I don't know what my point is, other than it's nice to sound out what I've been thinking the past few days, too.
We're with you!
In my support group last night, we talked about it. I somehow seem to have a better hold on it than others. Why? Because I acknowledge it's an issue - just like you do. I think that makes a world of difference. Unlike the guy sitting next to me bragging about eating peanut butter on oreos and several slices of white bread a day.
I guess I just keep trying to do the reverse, I obsess about what I'm NOT going to do with food - rather than what I want to do.
This morning I had a slice of rum cake and 3 rum balls at work because we're having a total overhaul here which is emotionally exhausting for all of us. As a result, I went in this morning with the knowledge I'd do it. Preparing for bad eating... not so good. But, it allows me to keep the reigns tighter on myself.
I don't know what my point is, other than it's nice to sound out what I've been thinking the past few days, too.
We're with you!
On June 13, 2012 at 10:18 AM Pacific Time, RobynNOLA wrote:
I've had this happen a few times recently. I'm 8 to goal and some days I just 'want' where I didn't want before. I'm also a 'secret eater' and was bad with binges, before. In my support group last night, we talked about it. I somehow seem to have a better hold on it than others. Why? Because I acknowledge it's an issue - just like you do. I think that makes a world of difference. Unlike the guy sitting next to me bragging about eating peanut butter on oreos and several slices of white bread a day.
I guess I just keep trying to do the reverse, I obsess about what I'm NOT going to do with food - rather than what I want to do.
This morning I had a slice of rum cake and 3 rum balls at work because we're having a total overhaul here which is emotionally exhausting for all of us. As a result, I went in this morning with the knowledge I'd do it. Preparing for bad eating... not so good. But, it allows me to keep the reigns tighter on myself.
I don't know what my point is, other than it's nice to sound out what I've been thinking the past few days, too.
We're with you!
This the most important line on this whole thread,IMHO.
On the other hand,I'm also not so sure giving my self an "excuse" to do what I want to do is productive,as you have noted. I can *always* find a *good* excuse to do what I want to do,which is why I practice the reverse as well.
GL
I have done that as well, hidden food from my husband! When I was putting up my son's cake this weekend, I would take a bite here and there so he or no one else will see.
WE HAVE TO STOP that and get back on track! The truth is, they may not see us put it in our mouths, but they will see it on our butts! LOL
You can do it! Lets' do it together!!
WE HAVE TO STOP that and get back on track! The truth is, they may not see us put it in our mouths, but they will see it on our butts! LOL
You can do it! Lets' do it together!!
VSG 3/07/12 HW:260 SW: 249 CW:164
Good for you for acknowledging what happened yesterday and taking responsibility for it! Really, think how big a step that is for people like us! Excellent work.
Yup, you messed up yesterday and I get how scared you must be feeling. As I approach goal I am having a lot of feelings of uncertainty and imbalance. I have been told that this is a normal part of the process. I meet with my surgeon's support team today and will talk with them about all that.
I notice that your 1 year "surgiversary" is upcoming. Perhaps you have some feelings around that that haven't surfaced yet. Clearly, you aren't feeling your best mentally with all the stress and you must have used food as a coping mechanism for years. It seems only natural that you would go into a known pattern to cope and feel better during this time. BUT, you are aware of what is happening so you can change the behavior.
You had a one day slip. It will not break the bank, but you may suffer the emotional and craving consequences of your slip in eating behavior. It's happened to many of us, myself included. Like the song says, "...pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again!"
Head high, now! You've done such good work. Hold on to that - not the slip!
Yup, you messed up yesterday and I get how scared you must be feeling. As I approach goal I am having a lot of feelings of uncertainty and imbalance. I have been told that this is a normal part of the process. I meet with my surgeon's support team today and will talk with them about all that.
I notice that your 1 year "surgiversary" is upcoming. Perhaps you have some feelings around that that haven't surfaced yet. Clearly, you aren't feeling your best mentally with all the stress and you must have used food as a coping mechanism for years. It seems only natural that you would go into a known pattern to cope and feel better during this time. BUT, you are aware of what is happening so you can change the behavior.
You had a one day slip. It will not break the bank, but you may suffer the emotional and craving consequences of your slip in eating behavior. It's happened to many of us, myself included. Like the song says, "...pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again!"
Head high, now! You've done such good work. Hold on to that - not the slip!
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