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Wow I haven't been on for more than 6 months. Life is good!
I just came back from my 1 year check up at St. Joe's and I am 110 pounds down.
I am not taking my vitamins and eating my protein so I do have a deficiency in many areas. I promised them I would do better I now have to go to my regular doctor and have blood taken every 2 months and forward it to St. Joe's so that they can follow up and see where I need to strengthen!
I lack in Zinc, my PHT (thyroid level) is too high, I lack in protein so I am  back to my shakes! and all my levels are border line
But I feel great. I still get depressed but not because of my over weight! I am now in the 30's for my BMI which when I started it was in the 50's  SO YIPEEE!!!
I still have another 30 pounds to reach my goal and then NIP and TUCK cause I have now tube sock titties! Wing spam arms I can be a Jumbo jet ! and a tummy flab that covers my crotch so I won't need underwear!!  My knees have sockets I need everything pulled up and cut away!!
I wear spandex undergarments and leggings! I'd love to have these flaps gone and am looking into finding a good doc that will remove excess skin.
Anyways I just ad to update!! Thanks for following, good luck to those who are doing this great challenge and Yes even though I was a cry baby in the beginning I love the new me in look. My kids have never seen their mama this thin (and I am still over weight) But well worth the fun!!!

Wow how time flies when you're having fun!
I have been having pain in my upper stomach , more of a burning especially after I drink my peppermint tea, eat marinated food or pasta!
Acid reflex? Don't know I do have a Doctor appointment next week to find out!

I have lost in the 6 months 75 pounds! OK I didn't really but since I started with St. Joes the first weigh in It has been 75 pounds! Since the surgery it has been 45!!

 I feel great loving the fact that I can now fit into an XL or sixe 20!!
I bought bathing suits but I wear leggings or capri spandex underneath to hold the fat from my legs and I do aquafitness 2X week. I can't believe that I enjoy the water and exercise that much!
I can breath so much easier asn well, my endurance is great. I do gt cravings but I don't over enduldge and I am good about that Proud to say!
The thing I hate the most is the terrible loose skin under my arms, legs, stomach!! I hate it so much that days I can cry and disappear! I rather get it all cut off so I can heal. Thank goodness for SPANX!
I can not wait to get down to under 200 75+ to go and I know I can do it!! One dday at a time and hopefully nip and tuck will reduce it too!

Well Hello I went to my first dance since my surgery 2 months ago and I was really moving the bootie!!!
I felt great, even the meal was fantastic and I left over half of everything!
THe egg soup I had 3 tablespoons and gave the rest away.
then the salad I had 1/4 of that and gave the rest away. then the pasta I had 3 tablespoons of that; felt I had already too much and gave it away. then the main meal of chicken, beef, mash potatoes, green beans> well I ate the beans, gave the mash away and took a bite from the chicken and the beef and that was my dinner! And no bread with the meals or wine!
Full I couldn't move. SO I danced the night away to burn those calories. Drank water and forfeit on the great dessert platter of cakes, fruits and puddings! I figured dancing was more fun.
Since the first weigh in I have gone down from a 4X to a 1x and I had a bra size of 50 H now wearing a 42H !!! feeling good. it is about 47 lbs.
I must admit I was depressed at first casue I didn't see the pounds going off; I am loosing only about 2 pounds a week my son told me "Mom that is 100 pounds in a year!" That was more like it! I realized hey I can do this at a pound or two a week, it is even better slowly so that my body can get used to this all.
I now am doing exercise but boy I have pain ! My body wasn't used to all that movement before and well now I wiggle and giggle and laugh it up.
Next dance is the 11th and then the next Christmas party the 16th of December!! Woot Woot!! I am gonna dance the night away again!!
People I am getting this new life style slowly but surely everything will come into place! one pound at a time and a day at a time too.
I even went and colored my hair strawberry blond!! Figure I got to make some changes to my face as well!
I'll keep you guys posted on how my 3 month check up will be cause I bet my blood count will show that I am not a regular vitamins, protein, calcium intaker!!
But I am lighter, happier, and doing good!

WOW I can't believe one month ago on September 15th, I had my surgery!
The first 2 weeks were hell for me, a lot of internal pain, problems with constipation and not being able to drink my full amount of 2 liters. I felt as a Mom inadequate since I really relied on my children instead of them on me. But I am so grateful for the strong bond we have and the super support they have given me and are still doing! The love is undescribable and cherished!
Today I feel energetic! I want to go out and do things I don't feel like sitting at home!
Time to get back out there and see life for what it really is!
I have my one month on Monday and I hope it will be a great experience!
SO off I go do some window shopping, get into a swimsuit and try to do some laps!
TIll the next my buddies!

Well I feel much much better today then I had the past weeks.
I finally drank a whole carnation breakfast anytime and I can laugh out loud without the interior pain. It is getting better each day! I swore I would never do a surgery like this again! EVER!
I still have interior pains like stitches pulling along my fat when I walk too much or try to lay on my side! I want to sleep so badly on my side or tummy and still can't do that!
I walk daily for about an hour through malls and do lots of window shopping since I can't carry any of the items I want just yet!
My children are the best care givers ever! They have taken turns rotating their time, making sure my meds (vitamins) and shots are taken. That I walk and move around and that I do not carry anything heavy!
They were kind enough and courageous enough to wipe my back end when I couldn't even get my arms around to do it myself! When I had a bad spell of constipation they gave me an enema.!! MY dearest babies I love you dearly and Thank You from the bottom of my heart. I appreciate your support and love and I am so grateful for you in my life!
To RDTTS I deeply love you !!!
And thanks for noticing the weight lose, cause I don't!

WOW I am a wuss, chicken, pussy, crybaby! You name it I am it!!
Pain is terrible! I only really have pain on one side! left upper stich! Doctors say it is propbably because they did the most work from there!
Well it is so hard to pick up oneself from the toilet or bed! I got a crutch that I use to help me and my daughter tries to pull me up. Poor thing trying to lift a 310 lb woman from the toilet! ANd how am I to wipe my back end? I can't even twist!
WOW I am a complainer!! But at least in the hospital I had the bed rails and the bar by the toilet to pull myself up!! I got nothing here! I need stronger drugs!!! LOL
But other then that everything went well! I finally can put a face to Dr. Anvari and he isn't bad looking, and he smells great!!
I liked his staff, they were funny!
I did walk around a few times a day and then went back to bed to sleep!
First day back from recovery I had a hard time trying to keep the oxygen level up that they gave me extra dose of oxygen to help.
Now I have to breathe deep, and long I got myself balloons to breath into to help with that!
Well enough for now I want to go rest again!
the left side is not dealing with me too well so I got to lay back and relax.
To all who sent their best wishes Thank you ! Much appreciated! Will chat with you all soon!
Sylvia

Well my dear friends, followers ! 
This time tomorrow I shall be rolling up to my room a new ME!
Feelings? I don't know if I have any.
NERVOUS? I can't say I am.

I know I will feel different. I hope I will succeed and be happy with my decision. I want to be a skinnier me, a healthier me, a happier me, an active me, robust and full of energy, life, fun.
I am fearful of failure, not staying true to my new me. I know I love food and I know I use food as a comfort and I hate gagging, so I will have to concentrate on staying healthy, happy, without my comfort of warm food.
I have new friends now who will understand what I am going through and I know I can rely on them.
I have different goals too, I am an achiever, I hate giving up, so I will do the best I can. I know I need a kick every so often so please my friends give it freely. I will love you more for it!
I hate pain, yet I have to be strong for those around me. I do not want to show weakness. 
I want to thank everyone reading this, giving me support, understanding me for what I am going through, and will be going through.
Thank you for the love! Something I so desperately need! Thank you TORCH for being my Angel! I hope I can repay the favor and live up to your deeds that you have done for me these past months!
I truly appreciate it all!
Till Friday when I get home!! Take care Be happy, Stay healthy, Continue to Love, Laugh and Live!!
Sylvia

SO I went to my pre op today. Boy when they say 3 hours they mean waiting time 2 1/4 and 45 minutes with pharmacist, nurse, and anesthesia specialist!
Well since August 28th I lost 18 pounds just with Optifast! not bad for enjoying my shakes!
My blood pressure went down and my heart rate was good and normal!
So the nurse was upset with my fever and was wondering if I had H1N1 and I was sure I didn't! But she will wait for my final results from my GP on Monday and insist I talk to the office about my sunburns since they should be eithr brown now or gone and I am still very red on one leg! She thinks I had 3rd degree burning to leave a scar like that! OH well I'll learn for next time to stop along the river and cream myself up some more!
So now my count down begins! As of Sunday evening I am finished with my Optifast. Then only clear liquids till Tuesday night midnight then off to St. Joe's for 6am. I am first of the day so at least I know the doctor will be well rested and fresh to go!!
I was told today it will be Dr. Anvari, not Dr. Hong. Even though I had Dr. Hong for my gastroscopy and Dr. interview!
As long as they are good and awake I don't care!
Am I getting excited? Yes
Am I nervous? getting there yes
Am I afraid? Yes 'what if....' is popping in my head all the time
Really this means I will be thin again !!!!
After 27 years!!! OMG  my babies never saw a thin mama! They only know me at, obese! I only hope I can maintain this and
show then how I once was even if I don't get to my early 20's weight but to a healthy and lively mom who will do everything with them without complaining my knees, my back, my joints hurt
My next and new concern will be how do I get rid of the flab!!
I looked in the mirror today and saw that my legs are starting to have rolls! SAD and UGLY
I have to get them firm ! I made fun with my daughter once saying my Girls (boobs) will be hanging to the belly button and my bellybutton will be so afraid of the two of them that it will try to run south ad meet my crotch and my croth will flip over down to my knees and then to start the day  I am going to have to start atr the knees and start rolling my body parts upwards till I can fill my girls are filled in a sexy support bra and at night it will be the song "Hang out Boogie!!" let it all hang out!  At least I will get my roll up exercises!!
Anyways  Here goes!!!
7 more days!!!

 TIme seems to go slow yet for others it flies! I guess when one waits for something it always goes s l o w . . .

I cheated this past weekend.. OK shoot me.. I had my kids come for the weekend and I made them schnitzel (veal breaded ) with fresh corn on the cob and well I had some! YES I was guilty after I did it and the worse part was I didn't do it in front of my kids I ate it secretly in the kitchen cause I didn't want to start a discussion. They are so supportive and I am weak. I loved the smell of the veal and the fact it was fresh corn on the cob. I gave in. I know I got exactly 2 weeks now to behave and stay true to my diet with Optifast!
I have been on Optifast longer then they said to I started a week earlier and I do notice a differance in my weight I have lost inches. Maybe weight too. But I upset that I ahd NO will power and that I hid that fact. I tell it here but not to my kids!
OK I promise it was one slip and I am going to be good to myself and stay true to Optifast. TOday is the true count down to a better me, a stronger me, and in two weeks I shall be starting a happier me too!
Fears are there, emotions are there, and yes decissions are there too.
Thanks for the support, understanding and cheering.
I am a good person....solid ....I will survive....

September 1, 2010
Well the last 2 days I have been real sick 101.1 fever, nausea, everything hurts! shoulders, back, knees. I sleep alot and sweat too. I feel like crap! Going to the doctor tomorrow want to know why I still feel like this. I want a blood test taken to make sure there is nothing stopping me from having this surgery!!

September 2, 2010
Well I went to the doctor this morning cause I couldn't take it any more and I got pneumonia. I have strong antibiotics to get rid of it FAST before surgery otherwise they might very well postpone it!! Here I sit and cry cause I knew I wouldn't get the surgery something would come up!!!
I went for x-rays and I go back on the 12th for another set,  if there is no improvement she will call the hospital to cancel until I am better
PLEASE                 PLEASE  I want to be better!!! I'll do anything to be better!!!
I can't even stop crying

September 3,2010
I woke up this morning around 5 with the feeling I had to go to the bathroom! OMG I couldn't go I had soft bowels for over 3 weeks and now I couldn't. I tried everything I broke out in a sweat!! HELP! at around 10:15 I asked my son to buy me an enima! I asked for fast relief cause the pain was terrible!
Well finally at 2pm I had relief, (there was nothing fast about it) I was ready to go to the hospital. I cried and ripped myself apart. I tore skin, made hemmroids, I feel more uncomfortable sitting down.
I wonder if it was the Optifast that caused this blockage? I even put benefibre in my water to give that extra boost. I never felt like this ever! I hate that feeling of constipation!
I hate putting pressure and ripping my canal apart.
I am just right now so miserable nothing seems to go right!
PLease show a difference to me somewhere! This whole week has not been great health wise I need relief ! I'm tired of crying, hurting, feeling week, can't move, can't take deep breaths, I am so tired of all this misery!

WOW I have been on my Optifast now for a week! And it really isn't that bad! I change each meal up with either the chocolate or vanilla and I add extracts to them so I might have a chocolate mint, or chocolate banana, or vanilla coconut or almond joy with vanilla! Yes they do sound good don't they!!! MMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmm
It is'n bad I do have cravings of cheese and nice piece of steak but I substitute those with beef broth! and chicken broth at night so I feel like I'm having my meats!!
I stay on my 1.5 liters of water mixed with only 1 package of crystal light so it is not too sweet.
My boys want to bring the spare bed (single down stairs in the computer room so when I get home from the hospital I do not have to do stairs and if anything should happen the ambulance and staff do not have to carry heavy me down the winding stairs.
So for the 1st week I will do as they say and stay on the main floor. There is a WC I can use I am close to the kitchen to get my liquids, and I have a 42" flat screen in the othr room!!! NICE!!!!! One they see that nothing is wrong with me I can venture the stairs and have my first nice warm shower and sleep in my bed!!!! By then I think they will be glad I went upstairs so they can goof around.. But it is so nice they care!
My daughter who lives in Montreal wants to come and spend the night with me in the hospital and I will ask if that is alright when I do my pre op assessment!
She works in a hospital in Montreal and wants to help me get around!
plus she will stay for about 4 days afterwards to make sure I do walk and move and drink properly!! Such a cute mama!!!
I am proud of my kids, more than I tell them and I will be fine!
And if I die before I wake then I pray the Lord my soul to take!