update April 27

Apr 27, 2010

well I have had 2 appointments with a nutritionist had lost 5 lbs, then I dont know what happened. I gained it ALL back and then some! I am getting so frustrated!
Ok, truth be told I kinda know what happened. I fell back into my forgetting to eat, I under slept so i wasnt going to the gym, and getting an IUD didnt help. I am so sure that she is going to be disapointed in me. :( I feel like a failure before I even got a chance to get started. My family is NO help, we have pizza night every week, so I try to be good so I can have a slice. one night I will have my mom call and ask me to stop at taco bell. the next we both will be so tired to cook that mcdonalds looks good. pre preparring meals doesnt work because lets face it there is NO time! I worked 6 days this week and on the day I thought I was going to have off, I ended up awake for 25 hours. those coffee drionks add up in calories! 
 have my first appointment with the bariatric clinic tomorrow and guess what the packet they sent me last week, the one it took me an hour to fill out, is missing, I should be looking for it now but I have to finish cooking and then bathe the kids get a shower while they are ion the bath and go to work! sigh, I hope that this is what God has meant for me because without the band I will never get to lose weight. I need that counter control. heres the perfect example, sat was the day i was up 25 hours, so sat DAY I slept for 8 hours woak up at 3pm and was constantly hungry, drank the protien shake, had a sandich with ham and turkey with the kids, ate the 5 chips they didnt eat, went to get a stick of string cheese, cleaned the kitchen then had a yogurt, did laundry and contemplated a snack ended up eating some pineapple, made dinner nibbeling on spagetti and meat balls, had a good portion for dinner...drank another protien shake on my way to work. that was in what 6 hours! I felt like I was always eating, but I also felt like i was always hungry, it wasnt like I was bored! I would think about food as I was doing other stuff! something needs to happen!

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