Stress Eating?

Darla S.
on 11/3/11 3:16 am - Maple Grove, MN
For any of you struggling with teenage daughters, have a look at Dear Abby from yesterday.  It's awesome.

Life continues to stress me out.  My husband got a job in August, after almost two and a half years of being laid off.  He is a painter, so he was a bit leery of a company hiring at the END of summer, but they assured him they have work year 'round.  He was laid off Monday.  I took on a hobby job in August myself, and have had only 5 days off since then - working 7 days a week, oftentimes both of my jobs, which makes for 14 hour days.  It exhausts me, but it also gives me an escape from the the misery at home.  How's THAT for pathetic?

My daughter is almost 19, and although I love her with all my heart, the choices she makes these days break my heart - her boyfriend, her weight, her sense of entitlement and not feeling any kind of responsibility around home...  I could go on and on, but all I can do is pray that some day - SOON - the lightbulb in her noggin' will go on and she'll realize that her life is of her own creation, and it's up to HER to make the right choices and put in the effort to make things happen.  She is going to school, but I can't help worrying how seriously she's taking it - the frickin' loans she'll have to repay are PLENTY serious!

It just seems like everywhere I turn, I'm disappointed, anxious, stressed, and sometimes - downright angry.  The only thing I feel good about is the fact that I'm maintaining my weight, and some weeks even shedding a few pounds.  I had gained 20 from my lowest, but I've shaved about 5 of those off.  I just can't believe I'm not stuffing my face silly from all the stress - I didn't even go nuts with Halloween candy this year.  A few fun-size Twizzlers and Butterfingers, and that's about it. 

Thank God for Trazadone... without it, I wouldn't be able to sleep at night.

So there, my sob story.  I'm sorry - it makes me sad to see how dead this board has become, but with posts like this?  You can understand why I've been keeping to myself.  I'm just a big 'ol party on a stick these days.

I hope you are all working your tools...  Even when life sucks, it sucks a whole lot less at a normal weight than it would ginormously morbidly obese, like I was.  God bless you all ~


  Imperfect does not = unsuccessful

Marsha F.
on 11/3/11 5:06 am
My sweet Darla Lou I am sending you  a bunch of hugs I wish things were better for you.  I havent been on much either just because I have gained weight and I am very ashamed of myself.  I Just can't see myself giving people advice , or encouragement when I can't even di it myself.  I found out about a year ago that I love beer.  I hadn't drank much since high school and had a few on New Years Eve and haven't really quit.  I love the weekends lets just say that.  I have gained about 27 pounds from my lowest weight and that makes me sick.  Enough of me sorry to ramble on and on if you ever need anything you know where I am.

Love ya Bunches
Marsha
 
Darla S.
on 11/4/11 12:09 am - Maple Grove, MN

I love you, Marsha Marsha Marsha....  it's good to see you post here, even if you're not feeling so peachy about yourself., either.

As for those 27 pounds?  Here's a challenge to you.  Every time you start to beat yourself up over those 27 that you've re-gained, you HAVE to pat yourself on the back for all the pounds that are STILL GONE.  Never lose sight of how far you've come, 'cuz that's a ticket back on the merry-go-round of pitching your giveadamn and gaining MORE back.

As for the beer?  I don't know what to tell you there, sounds like a cross-addiction.  I find that most alcohol doesn't do a lot for me anyway, other than wine.  So when I DO have a drink - yup, it's wine.  I'm not going to bother drinking beer if I don't get the buzz. 

You are aware, that's half the battle.  The easy half, but still...

love love love you,
me


  Imperfect does not = unsuccessful

(deactivated member)
on 11/3/11 6:42 am
(((Darla)))

I don't come out here much...trying to get better at it again, but as I approach my 5th year...I don't really know many ppl out here...and like you have said this board is DEAD.

I'm not working my tool as appropriately as I should.  I don't exercise at all...and I know if I did I would lose that 20 I've gained back from my lowest.  But I am happy with myself....for the most part...Like Marsha...I've discovered that I love beer...but I've also discovered that when I drink...I DON'T eat which is another self sabbotage in itself...UGH...

But dang it!  Be proud of how far you have come.  Maybe some us "old" posters need to freshen up this board.
Darla S.
on 11/4/11 12:12 am - Maple Grove, MN
I agree, there are a lot of 'old timers' that I miss here.  I do enjoy the newer folks, and they help me to remember where I came from, but those of us who are several years out have a different set of challenges.  Some WLS related, many not.

Anyway, do pop in and contribute as often as you feel inspired to - just being here, we all help each other 


  Imperfect does not = unsuccessful

DragonGirl
on 11/3/11 7:52 am - MN
Hey!
I hope you guys do visit more often!! I'd like to see this board thrive more, too! I know it's going to be a lot tougher when I get further out, but I hope you guys will stick around and support each other as well as me! The way I look at it...support group meetings and forums are like AA for us. When you fall off the wagon, you have to get back on...what better way to do that than come back to the people who can relate the best??

Best wishes to you!
Heidi
  Age 49 Height 5'5" HW/280 SW/250 CW/157  
Behind every success is effort...Behind every effort is passion...Behind every passion is someone with the courage to try.
Darla S.
on 11/4/11 12:14 am - Maple Grove, MN
a few years ago, we'd have sometimes two or more PAGES of new posts every day!  It was - well, maybe I spent TOO much time here for my own good, but like you said - it's like AA.  We need the support, we need to keep our WLS in front of us so we stay mindful.

I will say this, I love my little butterfly tat on my hand.  It's ALWAYS there for me - and if I can consider myself successful, I give much of the credit to that forever reminder I gave myself.  And little girls seem to like it  :)


  Imperfect does not = unsuccessful

(deactivated member)
on 11/4/11 12:48 am
Oh I remember those days of pages of daily posts.  I think that many ppl are migrating to using facebook as a place to go too.  There are lost of WLS support groups out on FB,  I belong to a couple.
(deactivated member)
on 11/4/11 12:49 am
Anyone here is more than welcome to find me out there.

I'm not sure how to find me....LOL  Paula Germain is my full name.
debim3
on 11/13/11 10:59 pm - Roberts, WI
Darla,

I'm not sure if you remember me?  I come out here every once in a while, but not too often.  I remember the "godd old days" when there were so many posts you couldn't keep up with them.  Why is the board dying?  I don't know.  I do know that I could not have made it that first year or two without my OH buddies!  I have a couple things for you today...

First, I have been there done that with a teenage daughter.  I went through more than 6 years of heartache with her, including her being kicked out of school, 8 months in treatment, court appearances, etc.  I cried more and prayed more than I ever thought I would have to.  She's doing good now, still making some choices I worry about, but compared to before...I can't complain.  The most important tip I have is to pick your battles, otherwise you find you are battling over every thing.

Second, I'm up 20 lbs from my lowest and I can not seem to get back on the program.  I beat myself up daily for gaining the weight and for failing daily to eat like a normal person.  I understand stress.  My stress is different than yours, but stress nonetheless.  I lost my job a year ago, decided to go back to college, have worked PT jobs to supplement the money, have had to move twice because I couldn't afford where I was before anymore, and have had a couple of health issues.

I miss the support we used to get and give.  I think that's a big loss for us and for the newbies.  I got an email from OH.com congratulating me on my surgeversary...I hadn't even remembered it.  That makes me really sad because it was a pivotal and defining time of my life.  I miss you.  I have stayed in touch with Sweet Sue and that is about all.  I miss the coffee's.  I miss my pants not leaving red marks around my waist!  I miss feeling good, vibrant, and healthy.  I'm scared that I'll never be able to get back to basics and get back to where I was.  I have a hard time even remembering what is the right way to eat.  I still take my vitamins faithfully and drink my water, so I am happy for that.

I hope you can find a way to live with the stress that is your life.  I hope we can reconnect.
Debi
HW 265 / SW 226.5 / CW 130.5 / GW 135
        
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