I'm going to stop posting for awhile

I'm completely devastated.  I went to see the surgeon yesterday and he doesn't want to do the surgery.  This is due to the fact that I've had surgery twice on my stomach before and he doesn't know how much scar tissue there will be.  His suggestion was for me to go on Optifast for a year.  In his opinion I could lose 50lbs.  That still leaves me fat.  Been there done that.  That's the point where I always get stuck.  Also, he said there is a 35% success rate.  That doesn't sound like good odds to me.  He is going to bring me case up with the two other surgeons and get their opinions but doesn't look good.  The only thing I can do now is to push for exploratory surgery.  He said if he did operate he may get in there and decide it can't be done.  I'd rather he do that and then look at other options like Optifast.  Can't get my mind wrapped around having to do that for a year.

I keep tearring up everytime I think about it.  I feel like all my hopes and dreams for after surgery were just ripped away from me.  I feel like I've failed my son.  There were so many things I was planning on doing with him after I'd lost the weight.  I know he loves me for who I am and I know he won't be disappointed in me but I still feel like I've failed.

I'm so depressed right now I don't know what to do.  I can't keep reading about other people having surgery and their joys and accomplishments right now.  I'm just too raw.  So I wish everyone well and keep up the good work.

Take care,
Lisa

OMG, Lisa...I am SO SO sorry to hear that .  I dont know what else to say - I completely understand not wanting to come here and read about everyone getting surgery.  Please keep us updated on any decisions the surgeons make.

[[[[HUGS]]]] 

ETA:  I wanted to comment on what you said about failing.  You havent failed anyone.  Not you, not your son.  Our health care system is failing you.  There has to be other options.  This is why it irks me to no end that OHIP took DS and VSG off the table.  These are likely options for people who dont qualify for RNY.

That is awful news:( I would be a mess too I hope that it is still doable after exporatory surgery.  Good luck

Im so sorry.. I couldn't even imagine having gone this far to have something so upsetting happen. I will keep you in my thoughts and I pray the doctor changes his mind. All the best for your journey ahead!

I am sorry to hear this Lisa.  Can they do an open surgery?  Could you be transferred to Humber where they have been doing the surgeries for many more years and may be more familiar with your needs.. Don't give up!

Thinking of you,

Tracey

Lisa, I am so sad to read what you're going through - I'm so sorry.  Is there a possibility of having your case reviewed by the surgeons at HRRH (Hagen, Klein, Starr)?  If it were me, I would push for that to at least see what their professional opinion is as well.

Please don't give up on yourself - we won't.  We are here to support you through whatever you're going through.

Best,
Karen XO

 Lisa, 

I'm so very sry  to hear ur news, I had 2 previous surgeries on my tummy gallbladder removed by Dr Anvari and a hernia repair ( open ) 

When i seen the surgeon for GBPS the assistant had told me she wasn't sure i would be a gd candidate for this that there was another option but she wanted to consult with the team first, few days later i did get the go ahead, plz don't give up !! 

I would also suggest having the VSG as yes it is covered if the surgeon can not do the RNY safely, ask to speak to the other surgeons get every ones opinions as to why they feel this won't work for you.  believe in ur self, and maybe request another hospital.

I wish you all the best in ur journey,

Joy

 Hey Lisa,

I'm so sorry to hear this news.  It has to be devastating... I can't blame you for feeling so down but I agree with Karen.  See if they will refer you to a clinic who has more experience for that second opinion.  

((HUGS))

Sue

Oh I am so very sorry to read your post...fully understand how you feel...was turned away in Guelph because I had gained some weight...I won't go into the reasons now...suffice to say I was devestated!! The Female Dr. I saw said I was getting too old...had had too many surgeries...none of her team would operate on me and she surely wouldn't. Felt like I had been kicked in the stomach...she said to call Windsor..that is where I started my journey...in 6 months...to loose 25lb...not to crash diet it off or she would know! I thought this is the end of this...I felt just like you...crying and heartbroken...then I got a call from Windsor giving me an appointment for July 4. I am praying this is my second chance...sometimes I think we just meet them on a bad day..do try other options as the others have suggested....I will add you to my prayers for success!!

 I'm so sorry to hear that!! I can't imagine your sorrow right now... hope it works out I wish I had something other then my sympathies to offer