OT - sad times for me

Just spent a few days down home (outside of London) with my oldest friend.

After battling ovarian and breast cancer for the last three years (and losing both her Mom and her Mom's sister to it) we went to the clinic on Tuesday morning to get the latest biopsy results.

Yup, the ovarian cancer is back, and she's now been told she's terminal.
She is 57 years old, has three kids, worked fulltime in a daycare centre, and had a very fulfilled and family-involved life.

Thankfully there's not much pain yet - it's mostly belly discomfort from pressure, and a lot of fatigue.
One good thing - because hers is a genetically-predisposed cancer (she's got the markers up the wazoo) she has a good chance of buying a fair amount of time by undergoing chemotherapy again.
So we're translating what the oncologist told her to mean that her lifespan can still be measured in years rather than months.

So I'm working on a plan to take her to Europe next spring, re-creating a trip we both took together when we were 17.

But I'm going to lose my oldest friend, and so I'm sad.

Awww Gaby, I'm so sorry to hear about your friend.  It's so incredibly difficult to watch someone we love decline and have to deal with such terrible things.  HUGE hugs to you.  You're a wonderful friend and I'm sure she is truly grateful to have you in her life.  xo

 sorry to hear about your dear friend, my prayers are with you and her during this hard time.

Robin 

I'm so sorry that you and your friend are going through this.
My thoughts are with you.

CANCER Sucks.

I lost my sister in law to breast cancer 4 years ago. She battled it for 20 years.
So there is still lots of hope for your friend to have several years left.

Take each moment as you can.

I'm terribly sorry about your friend, while she will  likely be able to come to terms with it, those left behind find it extremelly hard.

You enjoy your time together and make some great memories while you are in Europe.

Big hugs.

J

Thanks -

it'll be the ovarian that kills her.
They say they got all of the breast cancer during the surgeries.

Her husband will be the worst - he's an extremely emotional guy, but bottles it all up.
And is predisposed (family heritage) to alcoholism.

While he and I have never been close, I am seriously worried about him.
He will not cope well with her death - at all.

It wouldn't surprise me to lose him quickly as well once she's gone, to either suicide or alcoholism.
He's being strong now, for her, but she's the guiding light of both her own and his (very large) families.

Her three boys will cope in varying ways (they were all lucky enough to find good partners) but he's gonna lose it - she and I both agree. So she's registered him to come with her for family counselling at the Cancer clinic.

I find that when breast cancer if first detected and then dealt with, it shows up somewhere else.

Our Marie, had 2 mastectomys 10 years apart, then 5 years after that, it showed up in her lungs, stomach, liver etc. Such as terrible disease.

Sounds like hubby is going to have a terrible time adjusting. and your friend will worry about him while everyone else worries about her. My sister in law was always so concerned about how everyone else was doing even during her last days in the hospital. what a saint she was.

Life throws us curves all the time. I'm sure you will be strong for your friend but take time for yourself as well, you know how emotionally draining this can be.

Again all my best to you and your friend.

Take care.

J

that's so sad, sending positive energy her way, and yours. Hugs.

What awful news, and as I'm 57, feel that is still way too young to be facing a terminal illness. the first thing that comes to mind is to make every moment count, and a trip to Europe really does. Good for you for thinking of this, and try and take care of yourself so you can be there for her.
hugs to you!

Gaby, your dear friend is very blessed to have you in her life...treasure every moment you have with her....Patti K.