Afraid to confront your doc?

I read a lot of posts from people who are unhappy with their surgeries (for all kinds of reasons) who, in followup, mention that they are afraid to confront their surgeon about their issues.

I've always had a tremendously great relationship with my surgeon and his staff. I've never been afraid to ask a question and they have never delayed in responding.

So, I'm wondering: what kind of relationship do you have with your surgeon? Have you ever felt that you've got an issue (for example: pain, not losing fast enough, etc) that you felt embarrassed to tell him to help you with? Are you intimidated by your doc or, worse, have you been browbeaten by him/her? Do you have one of those docs who berate you for not losing fast enough?

My surgeon is very kind and would never brow beat someone or shame them.  Back when I wasn't losing weight he would sit down with me and go over the band rules with me and try to come up with a plan of attack.  Rather than make me feel bad he would approach it as a problem that needed a solution.  When I saw him last time and I lost a bunch of weight he was sooo happy for me I thought he was going to throw a party.  Which felt great because I felt like this is his accomplishment too...he worked with me month after month.  

I have heard of surgeons who with hold fills as sort of a punishment for not losing enough weight!!!  I don't get that.  If my sugeon did that I would have never lost weight.       

My care providers go way beyond the call of duty ... I am totally comfortable and confident bringing up any issues with them ... as a matter of fact they even call and check on me when I have no issues which I seldom have and I do get congratulatory emails and even calls from them checking on me ... needless to say we run into each other a lot... this ranges from PCP, to surgeon, to nutritionist and even the guy who did my psych eval who is 12 years post RNY and an avid cyclist and a great support ....

I have the same relationship with all the providers included in my husband's and my children's care also...

I have to have a great relationship with my care providers, people who I trust with my care and that of my own otherwise they certainly would not be taking care of MOI ...

my Dr and staff are great they always ask question before i get to they are always kind and help full

 Hi Bette,

My surgeon is GREAT !!!  He and his staff have always been nothing but great to me and I know that probably most of his patients feel the same as I do about him.  He was there when my gall bladder went bad and removed it for me and this past summer I had problems and went to ER and found out I had a intestinal hernia and was not pleased with the surgeon that the ER gave me....he got me moved to a different hospital and did my hernia surgery at 10 PM that night.    He is a blessing in my life.  Also they have always answered any questions immediately that I had and are always there for me if I need them.    Even though he has done thousands of surgeries....he remembers my name.    If I had a doc that didn't treat me with the respect that I was due I would find one that did.     Have a great day !!!


Hugs and blessings ~~~ Vivian 

I was so unhappy with my surgeon that I quit going for follow-up and need to find a new doctor.  I didn't receive adequate pre-surgery information, no nutritional counseling, & after care was terrible and downright humiliating.  My first visit after I was released from a month stay in the hospital the doctor didn't even have the nerve to speak to me as I waited in the hallway for a room.  Yes, I was waiting in the hallway in severe pain with a feeding tube in my stomach and no place to sit down!!!  Not even eye contact or quick "how are you".  I can only recall a handful of visits from him while I was in the hospital, he only sent his PA to check on me.  I almost died and spent 4 days on life support because of sloppy surgery, the least he could have done was acknowledge me.  My husband was livid the day of my doctor's appointment and couldn't believe his harsh (or nonexistent)  bedside manner. 

And to think my surgeon is featured on the A&E series "Heavy" as well as other TLC documentaries regarding WLS.  You would think he was "the best"  but in the end I felt like I was put through "chop shop" factory.  UGH... don't get me started...

 
I would hope you write a fitting surgeon testimonial to warn others in the future so they don't go through what you have!

My surgeon is great, it's his staff I do not care for. They treat everyone like they are a RNY patient...and we aren't. They treat us like we can't use the brain in our head. I just don't talk to them. His office staff at the front is fine, it's the nursing staff/his nut that I disagree with.

Liz

I think that WLS has become a big way for some surgeons to make money.  I'm not saying all. I just think you have to consider that the person or team of professionals you are picking are going to be part of your life awhile. I haven't had my surgery yet but will be in 9 days. My decision was based on reference from my own daughter. She had WLS 7 years ago and still follows up with her surgeon once or twice a year. His wonderful care for my daughter and a friend of hers made me feel comfortable. I explored another group that seemed like some used car salesmen. I'm not a used car, I am a Wife , Mom, Nanny etc. I want expert care, a professionally run office, credentials, and after support. I got all that and although I still am nervous about having surgery it's no more than a common fear and excitement for my life that is changing. Investigate before you have surgery, You need after care to be healthy and successful!

My problem is I did not have an option. I had to have the surgery I wanted IN state. It HAD to be at a COE, that elimated the other office in town. Only ONE surgeon IN state would touch a LIGHTWEIGHT for a DS. Therefore I am stuck with his office.

My husband did not have the same insurance so could go to a different one out of state and is using our PCP for follow up care. I am SERIOUSLY considering changing over and letting him handle my aftercare as well.

Liz