too much time on my hands.

See, that's the difference between men and women.  Men must have a replacement mate soon after and we women take our slow easy time.  I'm not so sure that getting back into the dating game is such a good ideal.  I mean, you need some time to reaquaint yourself with you.  From what you have said to me in person and in the messages, it sounds like your wife was sick for a really long time and you may be suffering from post traumatic stress disorder.  Take some time and don't rush into any relationship.  When the right one comes along, you will know.  But, when you do get back into the game, remember that women our age are not changeable.  We are set in our ways and if you think you can recreate the love of your life in a woman who might resemble her, you are going to fail miserably. But, in the mean time, eat those casseroles, but not too much, and like all the others have said, you are at an advantage in this market.  Just take your time.  Oh, and I asked hubby about the open marriage thing and that would be no.  LOL.  Plus, taking care of one husband is enough for any woman.  In the mean time, put your picture up and let these women see those gorgeous blue eyes and you will be snatched up right away. 

Are you saying that I am wanting a woman to take care of me?  Now that hurts.  I want a woman to talk to, ride my bike with, go for walks on the sand.  Now maybe that's a little corney but it's true.  I just want a companion who will enjoy the simple things.  Like you.  I want you.  Are you sure you really love your husband?

I agree with Jeannie ... you need to take time to find yourself first. A support group might be a good place. Or a widow/widowers group. I know a lot of people who have found solace or friends there. I think finding a friend first might be the first step. Maybe dates aren't the right move. Maybe you just need some new friends (male or female), and then go from there. I know when my brothers got divorced, they were cut off from their friends because the couples often took sides, and sometimes went with the ex-wife. Now, while I know that didn't happen in your case, you are now a "third wheel", so everyone is trying to "match" you up. My one brother found a new wife quickly; the other brother stayed single. He still needs more friends, but he doesn't make friends easily. I think you're right about finding a companion, someone to talk to ... so go find some friends first, and don't hurry into dating. If there's another mate out there, it will happen. If not, then it wasn't meant to be.

Be aware,Jeannie.And careful...

Yes. That is exactly what I am saying. I'm saying you need to learn to take care of yourself. Tell your son and his husband to let you handle your own life.  Yeah.  And you need to quit looking for a woman and get your ass off the sofa and cook and clean and live.  That's what we gals do.  We take care of ourselves and if it means working and housekeeping and cooking, we do it.  We don't get replacement men.  You, my friend, are looking for a replacement wife.  I know that is cruel but you need to be your own man before you can be another person's man. 

Hey, I say go for it...If someone can't love you for the person you are, for your generous and loving heart, then they aren't worth your time...I too have hanging skin, and am self conscious as well, so lets go share a salad and just forget all about it...LOL

If interested, theres a free singles dating program at www.plentyoffish.com  Its easy to sign up for...Might want to give that a try...Tammy

I don't think I'm ready for online dating services yet. 

OMG Tammy ... that is where I am attracting the nuts and frogs ... POF ... lol. I even had to report one!!!

OMG, yikes...Ive been there talking to a few guys, met one so far, but he was not my type...He must of been a nutcase if you had to report him...Gotta be careful, thats for sure...You cant trust anyone nowadays