What makes you work

Very interesting question there, Jeannie. I have pondered it while I was reading the answers from the others.

I am not sure just what my answer is....I would love to say, like so many before me, that I had the wls for the healthy side of it...and I think that most of the reason is for that...but...and we all have big butts...I do like the attention and the smiles and the flirting and the thoughts I have about myself too. All of those positive things bring good thougths about myself from the most important person to me...myself. I have learned to love and appreciate myself and that is something I never had. I always got the love and appreciation from others thoughts of me...and now I can do what I want and I still love and appreciate me for being me. I have to say the things above that I mentioned have helped me to look differently at myself too.

But whatever the reason I am so grateful for the things that I have chosen in my life. And I must admit that I am looking forward to longer and more exciting life that I have yet to live.

Thanks for asking such a thought provoking question..I think we need those every once in a while. It is always good to not forget where we came from. We could to easily go back there.

Brenda, you are so right that it is too easy to forget from where we came.  I, for one, don't ever want to forget what it felt like to walk carrying all those pounds around.  I would rather die than go back to that. 

What makes me work? Or what makes me tick? I think I am more comfortable in my skin than I have been in a long time. Never really happy with how I look, but much better than 5 years ago. I still need to lose more weight. Having had a lower body lift, now I hate my flabby droopy thighs. As my brother says "Kind of like painting one room in the house?" So true.

Before WLS I didn't even bother trying to wear makeup as I would just sweat it off even in the winter. I still don't wear much but I do take more pride in my appearance. I think that is because I can find clothing that is stylish and attractive now instead of just having to settle on whatever would fit.

I'm still uncomfortable with complements. I try to just say thank you and not "negate" the comment with an "oh this? It's from the thrift store." or "it just cost $7.00" or anything else kind of negative. Even more uncomfortable when the compliment has  to do with my physical appearance. It's hard for me to see an attractive woman. Sometimes when I see my reflection I'm still shocked that I am not super morbidly obese anymore. I think I see myself pretty realistically now.

I don't notice flirting. I'm naturally friendly to everyone and strike up conversations way too easily. But "hotties"? Naw, haven't had that experience. I'd probably faint from heart palpitations!

Jeannie, more thoughts on this but I'm still chewing on them at the moment.

Karen, I really think that we all suffer from distorted self image.  Even if we only have that distortation on occassion.  I have really been working at accepting compliments and, like you said, not follow them with something negative.  All those years of being obese has really left a large imprint up on our brains and it takes a long time, if ever, to iron that imprint out. 

Great thread lightswitch,
What keeps me going: enjoy excellent health now and actually look forward to going to the gym, taking my walks and bike-rides in the country.

Added bonus: who knew I was this small under my fat-suit. Yep, I enjoy the compliments from everyone, it never gets old for me. Now flirting? I was a flirt at 300 pounds, and I'm still a flirt but now kinda keep my distance. Why? Because I'm thin now and the rules changed for me. I knew I was safe at 300. Don't get me wrong, I am happily married but the ball games have changed here and now I'm very aware of how flirtatious I am.

I was the gal that was every man's friend, I'd set them up on dates with all my girlfriends. Guys were always comfortable around me. Now, for the first time in my life I'm thin...or at least normal size of 6/8. I really don't care for the extra attention men give me. I have a blast hanging out with my hubby and friends and really enjoy hanging out with just the girls.

I've finally learned how to accept a compliment. It took a while. Just smile and say thank you!