TERRIBLE 1st date post-surgery...any advice?

Bravo!  Superb response.

mmm

I never thought how he may take the comments about me not drinking - thanks for pointing out.  I certainly didn't intend to tell him that drinking is bad, in fact I told him how much I miss it lol.  I did not call him out for not opening the door, the topic just came up about how certain men walk on the street side when they are with a woman, or open doors for women, and he was very adamant that men do not need to do anything chivalrous for women since we want equality.

I look at holding doors open as just simple courtesy. If I get to a door first, I hold it open for anyone, male or female, young or old. I don't feel it's a chivalry or equality issue, just consideration for others.

I do the same - I'm female.  Holding the door for another person is a way of saying, "I recognize you exist and this is a nice thing I can do for you."  Regardless of the genders involved!

I do the same thing. Doesn't matter who it is just common courtesy to be helpful. 

Yes, exactly.

Me too.

I would have excused myself at the comment that men do not need to do anything chivalrous…..

Maybe age makes us make better use of our time.

I dated very intentionally instead of casually, so that may impact my approach--but I actually had no reserve telling someone on a first date.  For me, the surgery isn't taboo and if someone feels that way it was probably best for me to find out early on.  I don't view it a a super personal subject...its just one of those getting to know me topics. 

Kelly had some great ideas though...in hind sight I should have done those instead of dining.