Bad bad me.

 
Hey,

I'm guilty of piling on......

In all seriousness...... We all have/had issues with food/eating.

If what you listed is really what you ate......you need to speak with your surgeon immediately .....he/she needs to know you have issues and can guide you to some assistance. Also, I would question him/her on your capacity. A modern day sleeve should not be capable of that quantity at your stage.

That's why people are alarmed.....that amount of food should not be possible at your stage.

Need to get a handle on this very quick......

frisco

I did end up calling my surgeon cause I started feeling bad later.  The water sipping probably pushed the food down since I ate soft and soupy stuff first.  Believe me I am cured of misbehaving and not following my diet, I may not be so lucky next time if I don't.

Now you got it.... After you heal....people wil have less concerns...

I do have to say even though you may have washed the soft foods through......

The chicken is a big red flag...... One of the last foods I was cleared on. Chicken should close down your pyloric valve and not let much wash through for a while......an ounce and a half of chicken 2 weeks out is not close to normal for a 32-42 size sleeve.

frisco

 Hopefully you understand the enormous risk you have put yourself at- please, please be careful.  With that said, I would gently suggest that you stay away from temptation until you are healed.  Just don't go out to eat if that could be a trigger, get rid of the trigger foods in the house, etc.  I think we all struggle at one time or another with going off plan, but the key is getting yourself right back on plan.  And keep yourself safe!

 Umm, yeah, I am a food addict, you can read back though my posts to see my struggles BUT there is something I am MORE addicted to and more worried about then food and that's my LIFE. You put yours in jeopardy yesterday putting that much strain on a newly stapled stomach, so much could have gone wrong and you just got lucky that it DIDN'T. I was scared out of my mind at two weeks out to even try a MOUTHFUL of anything, let alone the amounts that you ate, so no, I don't have sympathy and I am not going to pat you on the back and tell you "it will  be ok, it was just a mistake, move on" b/c it is SO much more then that, this is self-destructive behavior to the extreme and needs to be checked immediately for your own safety. 

ALL of the nerves down the outside of your stomach have been CUT, they might not even be feeling pain or any sensations at all which is why you could stuff yourself beyond the capacity that you should be, you could have done damage and not even know it. You should be on the phone to your surgeon and searching for a therapist, not doing a drive-by on a website to get validation for your bad choice (which is what you are looking for if you are upset by anything other then support and a "it's ok" pat on the back). 

Nikki, honey, this really is bad and people are worried about you.  If you were an alcoholic and you'd posted that you'd had a bad episode of drunk driving, you probably would have gotten a lot of shocked and upset posts.  I'm the first person to jump in and say I have an addiction - a butt-kicking serious addiction - but it is still scary and upsetting to hear you've put yourself at such risk.

To the people who are angry at you, I would say *this* is what I mean when I say food can be addictive.  It can be every bit as deadly as alcoholism or drug addiction.  And lots harder to acknowledge.

To you, Nikki, I would say *please* use this incident to take your addiction really, really seriously.  You do not need to feel like ****  But you didn't make "a mistake" and this isn't an issue about not being "perfect" in a diet.  It is about being in the grips of a powerful addiction that can kill you.  You are in major denial if you characterize it otherwise.  I am telling you this straight up, as one addict to another.

You need to do whatever necessary immediately to keep this from happening again.  You need to go to any lengths to follow your post-op food plan so you can heal up.  Call people, see your doctor, see a therapist, keep away from slippery places, and think every minute about the life-and-death nature of the next few weeks.  You can PM me and we can talk more off-line.  We all want you to succeed.

(((Hugs)))

Thank you. I scared myself really good, and I have learned my lesson.  I really have.

Coming from someone who has a major food addiction and had a major drug addiction, technically HAS because once you have you always have, I don't think you are understanding what you did. I think you're seeing that you messed up when it came to eating too much or you ate the wrong foods and ate off your plan but I don't think you are grasping that you seriously could have died. And realistically, you could actually have a leak right now from that and you could have stomach acid going into your body right now. It's not about "being perfect about your diet" or the fact that none of us are perfect. There's a big difference between the fact that I ate four chicken nuggets at 3 months out and you stretching your stomach WAY beyond capacity when it is barely being held together by some ******g staples. If you can't grasp that concept and you're so busy focusing on the fact that you fell off the wagon of your addiction then I don't know what to tell you. My surgeon had 3 deaths in the last year and 2 of them were because the people ate **** they shouldn't have been eating. Think about that when you think we aren't being supportive.

Oh you're getting suport - just not the support you were hoping for.  You wished to be alieviated of your guilt.  Sorry.

Your attitude here is crappy, honestly.  You talk about food addiction to us like none of us understand what that is.  We all suffer, from some extent, to food addiction.  Yet, the vast, vast majority of us don't eat enough food to possibly physically damage our stomach two weeks post surgery.

Again, your attitude is poor:  " I don't appreciate the ridicule that I wasn't perfect about my diet, if we all were perfect none of would be here would we".... what you need to get into that skull of your is that you weren't off perfection in your diet here - you were almost about as wrong as you could possibly have been.  Too many calories, too many carbs, not cleared for solid foods, too much volume, drinking liquids during eating - stop pretending that you had a "bad diet day".  You really screwed up.  Your dinner had a small, non-trivial chance of killing you.  You gambled at that meal with your life.  Don't play this like you splurged and had a bite of ice cream half a year out. 

The questions about you seeking out causes of self-destructive behavior is appropriate.  Get a shrink, fast.  This is crucial since you've already had the surgery and cannot comply with the diet that is necessary to ensure you heal properly.  As far as addictions go, Happy is right to say that this is the equilivant of an alcoholic drunk-driving.  Addictions explain our behavior - they do not excuse the behavior.

It's your body, and your life - you may literally stuff your stomach with solid food until your staple line explodes, and your stomach acid drips out onto your lungs and heart and then die from internal hemmoraging.

No one's "kicking you" because you are down - people are kicking your ass back into shape since you're behaving incredibly self-destructively and no one wants to hear that after reaching out to you and trying to help you, that you've literally eaten yourself to death.

I'm sorry you didn't get the validation. You aren't going to get that from us. When you do something stupid, you will be called out on it. And this wasn't just stupid. It was DANGEROUS.

I went back and read your "latest posts" and I urge you to do the same. You're an RN. You obviously knew that what you were doing was a big risk to your body, health and life. You are not stupid in any shape or form. You're a bright beautiful person. You just have a problem and one you need more than a surgeon for.

I urge you. Please. Please. Please. Find a counselor. People don't take food addiction serious and you eating like this now shows just how deep yours runs. Promise me you will make a call Monday morning. Find someone.

Ya know, I kind of blame the surgeons here. I think they just don't take into account this. They just cut people open and do their thing and don't think about the emotional and mental ramifications. I was lucky, mine did, but more than that I had that moment of "Okay, now about my head..." and got help very very early.

Promise me. You are going to call on Monday.

People are beating you up, but you need a shock, sweetie. This was NOT smart. You cannot control it. Get help. Reading back through your posts, you were already talking about when you could eat horrible foods again. I'm not saying my diet is perfect. Heck, I split a bottle of wine with a friend Friday night and had a ****tail yesterday, all very heavy calorie laden. It's not something I usually do and I over did it with the brownie because I was tipsy. I learned from it though. I learned about myself and my body.

It just doesn't seem like you truly learned anything, which scares me. Find a counselor. Please. I beg you. I was SO scared and so hesitant to do it. Seriously, I thought she would be all judgemental and not really understand my past and what I've been through and where I'm going. I promise you, it's the BEST thing I've done for myself. It's probably more important than even getting surgery. It's been THAT life changing for me.

Please. Do it.