Twunderland...and so grateful!! (Shameless self-disclosure...)
It is both awesome and frightening for me that I had the VSG not even 2 weeks ago...and I hope never to see 300 lbs again on my scale! I am now in the 200s....something I've not seen since 2004. For me, the awesome part is that already I'm seeing changes...wearing cute cropped jeans I couldn't even fit in when I bought them 3 months ago...bounding up the stairs after my kid...seeing my (slightly) pared-down self in the mirror...18 lbs since surgery! And...that so far today I've had about 360 calories and I'm not hungry at all (with 57 g of protein so far!). This is the same person who could delve into a bowl of tortilla chips and salsa, and then eat a huge Mexican dinner, while making sure to get a dish that served both refried beans and rice, not just one side. (Ugh.)
The frightening part is just my own fear of self-defeating behaviors. I have been an expert in self-sabotage when it comes to food and dieting...I call it the "f--- it phenomenon." That is, I would eat healthfully during the day and blow it on a big dinner, or dessert, or both! Or, I'd drink a huge iced coffee (SF, of course!) while eating a donut or two for breakfast...starve myself until 3 p.m. or so, and then have a big late lunch because I didn't care about metabolism or portion control. Having the sleeve helps me to know that self-sabotage is less likely (especially as I'm still in the full liquid phase) because I truly cannot have those types of foods now, and it actually sickens me right now to even think of having them at all.
Maybe by saying 'frightening' I'm meaning a fear of the unknown. I've never known what it's like to be a size 8, 10, or even 12. I'm so used to being the funny one of my friends, and saying I didn't care what people thought of me and my weight (even though we all know I did). I've most often been the heaviest person in the room at both social and professional functions. I've never weighed less than my spouse (or past boyfriends). And maybe now I realize that I love myself enough to do something about my health in order to stay on this earth a while longer. So I'm looking forward to the unknowns, but I know it's going to take work, patience, and more work to get there.
Okay...thanks for reading! Oh, and if you've made it this far, I find it hilarious that my friend gave me "The Hunger Games" for reading post-surgery. I love the title.
The frightening part is just my own fear of self-defeating behaviors. I have been an expert in self-sabotage when it comes to food and dieting...I call it the "f--- it phenomenon." That is, I would eat healthfully during the day and blow it on a big dinner, or dessert, or both! Or, I'd drink a huge iced coffee (SF, of course!) while eating a donut or two for breakfast...starve myself until 3 p.m. or so, and then have a big late lunch because I didn't care about metabolism or portion control. Having the sleeve helps me to know that self-sabotage is less likely (especially as I'm still in the full liquid phase) because I truly cannot have those types of foods now, and it actually sickens me right now to even think of having them at all.
Maybe by saying 'frightening' I'm meaning a fear of the unknown. I've never known what it's like to be a size 8, 10, or even 12. I'm so used to being the funny one of my friends, and saying I didn't care what people thought of me and my weight (even though we all know I did). I've most often been the heaviest person in the room at both social and professional functions. I've never weighed less than my spouse (or past boyfriends). And maybe now I realize that I love myself enough to do something about my health in order to stay on this earth a while longer. So I'm looking forward to the unknowns, but I know it's going to take work, patience, and more work to get there.
Okay...thanks for reading! Oh, and if you've made it this far, I find it hilarious that my friend gave me "The Hunger Games" for reading post-surgery. I love the title.
Congrats on your surgery and weight loss thus far. Yeah the title "hunger games" is very fitting when it comes to us and our our struggles with food lol I have no doubt you will continue to rock that sleeve all the way to where you need to be. It's good you recognize your fears and understand them. Just know that if you fall all is not lost and the VSG is the most wonderful tool that will help you achieve your goals. Kerry
HW: 365lbs. SW:353 CW:182.4 GW:160 lbs.
Goal 1: Get under 300 (Reached as of 11/15/2011 299.4 Baby)
Goal 2- Get under 200 (Reached as of 08/29/2012 199.2 Baby)
Goal 3- Get to 160
I too am afraid of the unknown, I have lost weight in the past but as soon as people start noticing me I go back to eating the way I used to and gain even more weight than what i had stated out with.
I hope that getting this surgery will help me skip my self-sabotaging behavior.
Congrats on getting to the 200's
Celina
I hope that getting this surgery will help me skip my self-sabotaging behavior.
Congrats on getting to the 200's
Celina
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