what if hunger isn't the issue?

I really don't know if I should go through with this or not.  I know that VSG is restrictive, and that it diminishes ghrelin significantly.  But when I read vet's posts, it's almost always about control after the first year.  My issue isn't hunger; I usually forget to eat. When I read posts from pre-ops who are struggling with hunger, it's something I really I can't understand...  I eat because of stress, and because it tastes good.  I eat because what I want is ice cream or chocolate.  The other piece is that I eat too much because I don't stop after I get started.

I am (almost) certain I'd initially lose weight with the sleeve.  Is the concept that during those first months I'd initially lose weight because the sleeve would limit me, and that I'd maintain because I'd learn good habits for the future??

I really want to do this--I really want to learn self control and to control my weight--but I'm afraid that I may be the poster child for not keeping it off.

It's as if I have this three year old child inside who whines "But I WANT it!"  I feel deprived if I don't get what I want at that moment.  (Yes, I have some major neglect issues from my childhood.)

So is it worth it?  Is there some bit of magic with the sleeve that will help me change and learn that control?  Or should it be back to therapy before surgery??

FYI--I weigh (on my scale) 260 pounds, and have high cholesterol, high blood pressure, and occasional issues with blood sugar.  I'm 5'5", and 58 years old.  I also take a couple antidepressants and a med for narcolepsy.  I have a classic apple shape--flat ass, carry the worst of my weight through the middle.  My doc, obviously, would like me to lose weight, and will support WLS if it's what I want, but didn't suggest it.

Thanks for any insight ya'll can provide.  Judee

 

Heres the thing - Bariatric surgery will cause you to lose weight, at least initially.  It will not guarantee that you keep the weight off or don't regain.  Thats true of all of the procedures - restrictive or malabsorption.

What the surgery did for me was to give me a break - the honeymoon - for me to work on my behavior issues.  It leveled the playing field so to speak so that my biology was not working against me for the first time.  I don't know if behavior modification alone would have had the success it did without the surgery.  It certainly never had in the past.

The good habits and behavior changes will not be cured by osmosis after having surgery.  You have to work on them as hard as you do with staying on plan and exercise.  You say you eat when stressed, you eat because you want this or that.  What you will have to do is to get to the root of what drives that, so you can recognize it and develop tools for dealing with that in a healthy way.

I tell people that self-discipline and will power are bull****  Those are short term solutions to get you over humps.  Its only be truly understanding our motivations and developing healthy tools that we make lasting change.  My tools for doing that after surgery included going to every support group I could, and finally as I started entering maintenance one on one counseling.  I count reading and posting on OH as one of those aftercare activities as well.

Wow!! I could not have said that better my self.  I totally agree with you.

Yup... what he said. Exactly what he said.

BRAVO!  You said this perfectly. Outstanding insight and advice -- thank you.

I am still considered a newbie and completely agree with Rob. I feel like the sleeve has given me a chance to get in control. If offers me the ability to be in control of something that was out of control. Before surgery I started planning lifestyle changes to prepare for this and then I had surgery. It is all a re-learning process to me. I love how Rob describes this as leveling the playing field because that is exactly what it feels like. Finally it feels like I am doing what I am supposed to and my body is working with me instead of against me.

Good luck!

You have to be ready to make a change.  If you are not willing to give up the ice cream or the chocolate then you are not ready for surgery.  I think everyone on here has probably made a bad choice at times but we pick ourselves back up and start again.  I am a stress eater and I am using this time to try and find other ways to deal with that stress.  Some have turned to exercise or a new hobby, etc.  Rob is right you have to find out what is triggering your eating and probably see a counselor during the process.

You listed that your "doctor" would like to see you lose some weight.  What about you?

I am 48 and started at 285lbs, had high blood pressure, high cholesterol, close to being on meds for type 2 diabetes, sleep apnea, problems breathing, etc.  I am 4 months out from surgery, I have lost 80 lbs and am off all my medications and will hopefully be off my cpap machine this year.  I am taking this time to become healthier and my entire family works out every other day now.  If this is something that you really want then you can do this and there are support groups and people here on these boards that will support you but you have to decide that you are willing to do the work and even after you get to your goal weight, you have to keep working to maintain.  If you go back to your old habits and eating anything and everything you want then weight loss surgery is not for you at least at this time.

You may need therapy before and after the surgery to help you get through this.  This was the best thing that I ever did for myself and I have realized that I am important enough to take care of myself.

"Is there some bit of magic with the sleeve that will help me change and learn that control?  Or should it be back to therapy before surgery??"

Why do does it have to be either or? There's no reason you can't get a sleeve and stay in / start up again with therapy. Some people do need both.

I have to say that yes, there is, in my case, some kind of magic with the sleeve. I totally agree with everything Rob and the others have said too, if you can combine the surgery with other powerful tools like therapy (good therapy!!) and support groups and follow up with your doctor's programme, that is truly ideal. In my case, there is no programme, no therapy and follow up is labs only. The surgeon did the cutting and the rest is on me and my only support group and therapy is OH. There are very few therapists where I live who specialize in obesity related issues because its not great business around here...too few obese people!
So how is it magical for me? You know how they say that they operate on your stomach and not your brain? Well, in my case I think that my brain did get a shot of something! Because since surgery, almost 7 months ago, I have been compliant, I have exercised, taken my vitamins, made good choices and have just been delighted with the journey so far. I am a slow loser but I knew that would happen. I will however get to goal weight. I have no doubt about that.
So what happened to all of a sudden make me 'good' at this after surgery? No hunger at all helps. Restriction helps a lot. The desire to be healthy and live longer helps a ton. Putting every food and life choice through that filter helps a great deal.
I think what changed in me in particular is the fact that fear played such a huge part of my pre op year...I was a nervous wreck going into surgery. I really didn't think I'd go through with it. I was so terrified of everything that when I did wake up and realized I was alive, and well, then something clicked in me and my determination kicked in. I was no longer scared. I was pissed off royally at myself for having to have major surgery in order to lose weight. I was really mad. And I still am. I think that is also a filter that works for me. I NEVER WANT TO GO BACK THERE AGAIN because I hated it. I am turning 49 in a week from today. I am super successful in my career. I have three lovely children and really in all aspects of my life I am superwoman. The magic of the sleeve for me is that it gave me that little something extra to make me superwoman in my food control and choices also. So while I agree, it is a tool and it would be best to combine it with other tools and work to get to the root of the food issues and disordered eating, I still think there is something magical in this surgery. For me it sure is.