My hubby means well...

Whatever you decide we will be here for you.

Thank you!😊

You are more than welcome!

Check out the general forum someone posted a question how will having WLS be diffrrent over all the other times.  There are more perspectives from other posters.

That was a great thread! Thanks 

Nope, you do not owe him to try again. You owe it to yourself to take your health issues into your own hands and proceed. He will be Ok, and you will be far healthier. My husband was against it also. He talked me out of my first initiation of seeking the Rny. Then he tried again 2 years later when I found out about the Vsg. I did it anyway, he was fine, and we both really prospered from the process. He ended up losing over 100 pounds (no surgury) in his work in supporting me during the weight loss phase. You have established already that diets and such do not work for you. Don't let yourself get any heavier by waiting, and go with this. 

Your husband is not alone in his thinking. Mine was the same way at first and just wanted to be sure that I weighted all my options. See if he'll try reading some of the different forums on this site or attend a support group with you. After he went with me to my surgical consultation and A support group meeting (prior to surgery), his opinion changed quite a bit! 

My husband was against it at first saying he loved me the way I was and that I needed to accept myself etc. He was also worried I may die from complications.  I insisted on doing it for my health and I am so glad that I did. He turned out to be my biggest supporter too.  Now when he looks at older pictures of me he will say that I was always beautiful to him but that he had no idea how big I really was. 

Have the surgery for yourself and to take charge of your health. It's the best chance you have of keeping it off.

Good luck with your decision.

Jen

If YOU have decided that this surgery is right for you; if YOU have scheduled the surgery and believe it is necessary and will make a huge difference in YOUR health and well-being, then YOU should go ahead and have the surgery. This is not your husband's decision; this is YOUR decision. Feel free to listen to his advice, but YOU make the final call.

BTW, in the first few weeks post-op, when you're not feeling well yet, you may very well regret having had the surgery. This feeling is called "buyer's remorse" and is a very common feeling among recovering sleevers. It's temporary and will go away. Good luck!

psychoticparrot

Hi! I am also pre-op...due for surgery next month.

I have been researching surgery for over 10 years. I kept going back & forth...especially during periods when my insurance would not cover it. I convinced myself I could do it on my own which was a joke! I had never lost more than 20 lbs. on my own or been able to stay on a diet for more than a week.

I don't believe those of us who become morbidly obese can do it on our own. There is something within us that triggers the ongoing consumption of too much food...we seem to be missing the 'off' switch! It took me many years to reach this conclusion...it is MY opinion.

Fast forward to now. The waiting, 'trying to do it on my own,' and lack of insurance to cover the surgery wound up 'costing' me. Within a few years I was diagnosed with an obesity related cancer, sleep apnea, higher high blood pressure, an irreversible heart condition, aching joints, ongoing fatigue & depression. Last Fall I really felt awful which was never an issue before. I was scared!

I decided I HAD to have surgery or I would not see 60. I lost almost 60 lbs. so far on my own. My family has been supportive of me having the surgery with the exception of one brother. He actually kind of scared me saying the surgery risks were not worth taking & that I should continue losing weight on my own. But I know in my heart of hearts...my gut...I would not be successful on my own and I would only become sicker.

I do not have the time to mess around. This is my health...my life...my well-being. I don't want to continue giving up things slimmer ppl take for granted. I don't want to be sick...riding handicapped carts b/c of my weight...not being able to stand for long periods of time b/c I get breathless or dizzy...even in the shower...I don't want to feel fearful everytime I go to the doctor b/c there is a new obesity related diagnosis!

I know this is long so I will say one last thing before shutting up. Obesity is a very sneaky ass disease. Since I have lost weight I never realized all the things...little & big...that it affected. I am amazed at all the NSV's I have experienced! It is amazing it took the weight loss to realize the gradual loss of things from my life obesity took away. I am not willing to give my obesity one more thing! I deserve this surgery!

Best of luck in your decision process. Just bear in mind there are some things in life we can't get back!