70 pounds down!!!

Aug 12, 2011

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Me and my sassy compression hose

Jun 20, 2011

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Surgery done!

May 12, 2011

Here I am with a gastric bypass and it doesn't even feel real!  Two and a half weeks ago I had the surgery and I am feeling pretty good.  My incisions are healing properly I haven't thrown up or gotten sick.  I guess in some ways I am questioning if there was something done wrong because of all the stories I hear of people being sick and having a real hard time in the beginning but I have not had any problems.  I know this is a bad frame of mind but I am expecting something to go wrong because I have been so successful.  I know its stupid but maybe some of you can relate a bit.  Everyone keeps telling me I am going to melt away and I find myself feeling a little indifferent about it.  I am not sure why but its there.  I have to find something else to do though because I can no longer eat my boredom away and I have been plenty board waiting to go back to school/work but I still am having pain so strenuous activities are out for right now.   Anyhow I will be just fine just putting some thoughts out there :)   Othere than all that I have been protein powdering it up and vitamins are my best friend right now.  My blood sugars have been in the low 100's and I am thrilled.  Alot less insulin is needed.  I am still struggling with consistant time for everything.  I forget some things and miss others at times.  I will get it eventually its just alot.  Lord Jesus lets just keep it going!  In Jesus name I pray, Amen!
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Got my vitamins!

Apr 18, 2011

Got my vitamins, protein powder, and stir in fiber.  Still have to get a bullet and get some misc stuff before Friday's main event.  My Papa is coming tomorrow in from Vegas to stay with my son and I for extra help.  Can't wait to see him!  I'm still not sure what exactly is going through my teen aged sons mind about all this.  He really wont share but maybe when my Dad gets here we can get more outa him.  God, I hope I can do this.  I hate that little voice that always makes me doubt myself.  I have to kick her ass outa there but she is a stubborn one.  Anyways just stopping in to put some thoughts down.  To whoever is paying attention I really want your prayers or good energy if you don't get down that way.  Point blank I am scared!  Scared that I wont make it, scared that I am going to to sabotage this somehow, scared that I will just outright fail, and scared of yet again letting my loved ones down.  I am so not a low self esteem gal but after reading this I think I am going to call my therapist LOL!  No, I am just scared!  Lord I pray you just stick with me, help me to see the strength I have inside of me and all around me in my loved ones support!  I need You always!  In Jesus name I pray! 

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I have a date!

Apr 05, 2011

My date is April 22nd of 2011!  I am so excited and scared!  I guess my biggest fear is death which really doesn't matter because I am going through with it anyways.  I would really like to document my journey but I can be scatterbrained at times so lets say I am going to be as consistent as I can!  there are so many appointments, vitamins, and other misc stuff that needs to be done.  Everyone keeps saying how my head is too big to be skinny but I don't think I will ever be skinny.  I am a big woman underneath my extra loving even so we will see.  I really am looking forward to seeing all the changes that will be taking place.  I am prepared to move outside of my comfort zone.  This is an issue for me right now.  I stay tightly and safely put in my box in fear of what other people will say or what they think because I am fat as if I am less of a person because of it which is not true but I think it is something I have had to remind myself logically for I have been conditioned to feel so because of past hurts and cruel things that people have done and said about my weight.  I am really looking forward to hopefully not having to take insulin anymore!  So many things are swirling around in my head right now so I am going to leave it at this, Dear Lord Jesus!  Thank You for Your blessing!  I pray for safety in this surgery, hold me tight with you Lord and give the surgeon steady hands and a clear mind!  Keep me here on earth so I can do good things in your name!  In Jesus name I pray, Amen! 
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YES YES YES!!!

Mar 09, 2011

I SEE MY SURGEON ON MONDAY!!!!!!!  Wooooooo Hooooooo!  Now if I can just get this scheduled and over with before my slimey bastard of a govenor's bill comes into effect cuz if I have to wait I will have to cover expenses I can not afford.  I am keeping a positive outlook.  I am hoping my bariatric team will understand where I am coming from.  I have waited so long!!!!  I can wait a little longer but not TOOOOOO much longer.  I am ready for this! I want to start my two week liquid diet tomorrow!  I have to take a breath cant be gettin all antsy in my pantsy!  I need to keep a clear mind and positive attitude or this won't be as successful as it should be.  Lord Jesus I am almost there.  Please grant me the patience and the blessings for all this to fall through as quickly and smoothly as possible oh yah and . . . PLEASE dont let me die    In JESUS name!  AMEN!
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Ohhhhh Boy!

Feb 28, 2011

Here I am still patiently waiting.  I was put on a new medication that put an extra 20 pounds on so I am now the heaviest I have ever been at 328.  Holy fat girl batman!  However;  my doctor says that it is down to months so it will be sometime this year which is so exciting for me!  I go in for a sleep study in the middle of April.  I went back to school . . . AGAIN  LOL!  I am going for cosmetology this time so when I am finished I will have obtained in my life 1)CNA   2)License for special education assistant   3)Fashion Marketing Associates Degree   4)General Marketing Associates Degree and    5)liquor license   6)Cosmetology license.  In the business I want to be in it is a benefit to be slimmer than I am right now that's for sure.  Its a superficial Field of work which I am not a superficial person but I love the pretty girly side of it but I want to do my own business with it as well.  So I am continuing to be patient.  What is a few more months after waiting for several years?  So thats it from the peanut gallery.  Lord Jesus please stay with me and give me the strength to follow through with the activities needed to make this experience successful.  In Jesus name! 
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My new hair!

Feb 28, 2011


My new hair!
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What will it be like?

Dec 19, 2010

Sitting here pondering whether or not I will be able to positively react to the huge life changes this is bringing.  Not the eating, nutrition, and excercise part because I feel as if thast part has been hammered in there pretty good.  I am talking about the way I feel about me as a person.  The new attention I will be getting.  Will I react appropriately?  I know I am not invisible because my personality won't permitt such rediculousness however; there are times where I make sure I am not "out there" so people will leave me alone.  Does any one here know what I am talking about?  I am so very excited but also frightened at the same time.  All will be well I am sure of it!  Just some food for thought.  Lord Jesus please help me to strengthen my inner person to be ready for all the changes that will soon be knocking at my door in Jesus name AMEN!
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I am going to be positive

Dec 04, 2010

Here I am still waiting but I feel ok about the wait right now.  Looking back I realize that I was not mentally ready for the surgery.  I have given up carbonated beverages and I struggle with cravings a lot.  My favorite is Perrier and not drinking it can be difficult at times.  Learning how to chew properly is a lot harder than I thought it would be.  It so causes you to be more conscious of what you are eating.  I have made progress even though it has taken years.  I think that is why it has taken me so long to get things going, the Lord knew what was right for me .  I am finally listening to what the doctors are saying whole heartedly.  I am feeling a bit more confident about my understanding and patience.  I start school on Monday and I am so excited but nervous.  For those of you that have read my previous posts I have to say "Yes, I am a school junkie".  I am moving forward and I am anxious to get my life rolling whether I have the surgery or not.  I have been governing my life with fear and let me tell you it is not so productive to do so.  So, Lord I pray that you give me the strength to keep going and to do my best with what ever comes in my direction, AMEN!
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About Me
Sun Prairie, WI
Location
39.1
BMI
RNY
Surgery
04/22/2011
Surgery Date
Nov 05, 2008
Member Since

Friends 17

Latest Blog 17

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