Iteach-preK

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HI
Today is almost 9 weeks....in three days.
   I am down about 50 pounds. I am in my head still seeing those pounds on me.  People tell me how different I look, but aside from my face I don't see it.
   I started in a tight 26 and now I bought a 20 at Koles for end of the year ceremony.
   I hit a stall for about a week from 7 to 8.3, but it is broken now and I hit 249 on my scale.
   WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO  Hooooooooooooo! I cannot remember the last time I     weighed 240 anything. I came to KY 17 years ago wearing a 20, wow!  That is a brain bender.
   I scratched my cheek and it hurt there was no fat there. ha ha
   I feel better and the energy that people say comes back is really coming back. I can bend more easily. 
   I am struggling to get in everything...it is tough, but I keep trying. 
   I still absolutely hate the smell of protein.  And, my senses are still quite heightened.
   I have not really tried straight milk- but a little in things has been fine.
   I have been pretty good with it all. 

  I feel good about having had this surgery.  I do miss some foods, but I will try them laster on so for now they are on vacation.

hoping you are all well.
teach

Hi to everyone and anyone who may be reading my blog--
I am 4 weeks out tomorrow and feeling pretty good. I am finally doing life activities without any pain and haven't taken pain meds in forever.
I am down about 34 pounds from what I can calculate.  I feel really good about this, but wish I could lift yet. I need to bring up laundry from the basement...and hubby is on an a No lift for awhile yet. So, my 10 year old is learning all the thrills of laundry!!!
I can fit clothes I forgot I even had...hmm. I am excited but trying to not to get silly about it.
I am still having trouble getting everything in. I keep on trying, but it is tough....wow. I just keep on keeping on.
I am doing ok with vitamins, but not great with food intake.  I would NEVER have imagained that I would be too full to eat!
It is crazy.
I got my hair cut in a style I used to wear, and it is really short.  I like it, and so does hubby, but I imagine others might be surprised. People say that my face is thinner so I know this cut is good for that. I will have to wear a bit of makeup everyday. Oh, well.
Hubby is doing OK.  He is tired when he does anything, but he does not want to be confined to the house; so he does things he thinks he can.
Well, not too much going on, but life.
Hoping all is going well for everyone
teach

Hello everyone! Or anyone who may be reading this blog!

I am two weeks out today and feel like it is going well. I have an appointment to see the surgeon tomorrow for the first time since surgery.  I have had the home health nurse come out every other day on weekdays since I got home- so I have been checked out medically. I am well. I have some pain in my left side, but I beleive that is to be expected.
  I can move very well. And today I have been without the binder and all has gone well. I can pick up things on the foor IF I tread gingerly. I can pull up my pants so far. It seems like I am doing well.
I know that family would like me to be able to help with walking the dog, but not yet. I imagine it will be 3 or 4 more weeks as she can TUG!
   I can eat my foods fine. I have not had an PB or any dumping, but I am taking it slow. I drank a bit to fast on the slim fast a bit ago and felt really uncomfortable so I know I would not like dumping or anything like that. Today I was able to add in tuna, chicken and egg salad- woo hoo!!!!!!!!!!! I had a deviled egg for breakfast.  It was very very tastey. I look forward to tuna salad - all 60 cc's of it- tomorrow for lunch. Tonight not too sure what I will be having, but I will be good.
   I look forward to walking more. I thought I would be able to do more by now, but I understand this is the healing process and it is just that a process. I do not dictate, my body does. Last Thursday I did a bit too much and my body told me so.  Since then and on the advice of the home health nurse I have tried not to do the stairs that often.
   I finished my antibiotic and the blood thinner- yes!  I also seem to be past the screwy blood pressure issues. I was 124/64 today.  I will see Ms. Liddington on Friday and have her go over my bp and discuss the thyroid meds. I am glad to go back to her. I will also go see the pcp on post to follow up with him as well.
   I feel good emotionally. I do NOT have buyer's remorse. I feel reallly good about my choice to do this and know I have to follow the rules to be sucessful.  I get emotional over little things, but I KNOW IN MY HEART AND HEAD that I am going through hormone release and post surgical emotions and that it is normal.
   I am greatful for so many things: the support of my husband, my mother, the surprising positive and supportive reaction of my father, support of the family and friends who know.  I am greatful for the second chance to have a healthy life.  I am greatful that all went well. I am thankful that I can be here for my wonderful, loving, bright, and handsome son- Hunter. I am also thankful to go back to work and see my little 4 year olds...they are simply awesome!
   Did I tell you what my mother did?  First of all she is an amazing loving supportive mom, but very kind as well. When she arrived she had ordered me some shirts (like 5) to come in the mail in smaller sizes so I would have some when I get down some. I thought that was sooo sweet.
    Hubby; who is suffering his own health issues; has tried really hard to make certain I need nothing and always comes and checks on me.
    My beloved little man made me cry- here go those hormones. With me having been in the hospital and Daddy being sick Hunter did not think he would have an egg hunt. He said he understood that we would not be able to have one and it was ok.  Oh, man. I almost cried as I told him that though Daddy and I were not feeling well we would always do all we could to make the holidays normal.  He was so excited to get his basket and have the egg hunt with the neighbor girl who has joined us for the last 6 years...since he was 4 or maybe 7 years since he was three. It was just plain sweet. He melts my heart with his empathy and kindness.
   Well, it is going well and I feel good and look forward to seeing Dr. Shina tomorrow.

take care- Teach

Hi!
I'M A LOOSER!!! WHOO HOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I had intended to post the day I got home but did not get home until 945 on a rediculously rainy night.
   So, I can tell I am improving every day. I am feeling better everyday. I try to take my pain meds on some sort of schedual to prevent the breaking thru pain.
  I am able to eat my foods fine. I am on full liquids...soup goodies without the liquid, oatmeal, jello, broth.... It is not too hard. Mom makes my foods for me and that is helpful to not have to lift heavy pots and the like.
   We discovered that the protien in oatmeal is really tastey. I like it. So I get about 5 grams in my tiny 60 cc breakfast. I know I am not gettting it all in, but I am trying and doing better daily between medications, vitamins, and protein.
   I bought some very expensive from GNC and I cannot stand it. It is awful. I have the one I put in oatmeal and that seems to be just fine. I will have to find some others. I can drink low carb slim fast no problems- thankfully.
   The home health nurse comes out tomorrow and she will be taking out the drain and checking my staples from the 6 trocar holes from surgery. I have been happy with the way they look and the nurse was on Friday. 
   I can give my own bloodthinner shots and it is not hard at all. Between the surgery and the blood thinner I thought I would be far more bruised on my body, but it is really not bad. The arms are another story- I was sooo dehydrated from the NPO and the mag-cit bowel prep they could barely find my veins and boy, oh boy are my arms a mess.
   Hubby is great he helps me get out of bed- IF I need it- in the middle of the night.  He makes me take time for me and tries to see that I slow down.  Mom is great about it too.
   Mom has done everything from laundry to helping me, cooking ,taking Hunter to the movies....and like Hubby she has been a great source of support. 
   I am still napping in the afternoon. Yesterday I slept for 2 hours in the afternoon. I slept well in the night and when I awake I take my medication.
   I am moving well, I think. I can get up and down the stairs.  Where I used to have to go up or down the stairs one foot at a time, I can rotate them now. I could walk down rotating first, but up came quickly. My left side is sore, but I have managed to learn how to sit down and get up without the burning pain that stops you in your tracks. I still sometimes get that burning feeling, but most of the time I am not.  One time I always feel it is when I have to cough....oh, my!  I used to see stars when i did it, now it just stops me a second. The two times I have been to the local Wal*Mart I have ridden in a cart and I am glad I did so. I would not have made the entire trip there without it. I did fine with it. I always wear my binder, but some times it hurts my back at the waist. I was able to wash my hair by myself standing up at the kitchen sink. I thought that was relly cool. I was happy.
   I always feel full. I am working on getting all my protein in, but I know it will take some time to get "up to snuff".  One step at a time, one step at a time....  That is all I can do.
   I will continue to do what the doctor recommends and follow the rules.  My chewable vitamins suck...but I will not be on them forever...so I will make do. The levoquin pills are horse pills so I called and found that it is ok to split them- so I do and take them that way.

     I have not had buyers remorse and do not think I will. I am feeling good about this process and decision.  I am greatful for the chance to change my life!
thanks for reading -TEACH

Well, it never seemed like it would get here and here we are waiting for tomorrow. I am doing laundry and hanging out at home. Mom is playing on the DS we got for her. Hunter and Maddi are playing in the living room and occasionally irritating Steve as he watchs L'ville Cards in the tourney.
I really expected to be more nervous and anxious, but I am pretty mellow and relaxed. I thought I would be much more crazed. 
Yesterday is better than today for the clear liquids- no carb clear liquid it annoying.  I found a see thru-able drinkk but not sure it would have counted as it was a protien drink. OH, well. I will make it and I have enjoyed making home made chili and cornbread for dinner last night and this am it was blueberry muffins and eggs. I have had a lasrge quantity of chicken both. I even drank black coffee sweeten with splenda. Tonights dinner is meatloaf and mashed potatoes with green beans. But, not for me. I am not going to share no matter how much they beg, not even with my son....I will not be sharing my oh, so delicious chicken broth or jello. So, they better not even ask.
Still need to figure out if I am going to tell Daddy. I want to do it, but I don't want any problems.  Mom said you know you do not have to there is nothing saying to do so.  That is a thought. My Dad has an in law unit at my brothers so I should call them. OH, hell. I don't know.
I got a call from my friend from work, Jenny she just wanted to wish me well. I think she is very sweet. She said she would be thinking of me and wanted Steven to call her. So, I need to make a list of people for him to call. He will just love doing that. huh?
I think I have everything I need, but I have not packed. I want to pack my bag, but first I have to decided what clothes I will need there. I think I am going to bring a couple of different options. I know I need comfy pj's, my robe, and slippers.  I will also need to have my clothes for the go home. I will bring my soft pants- exercise pants and a loose t with a sweat jacket I have and love.   I will have a quite a bit of support.
OH, I am not looking forward to bowel prep. I have not eaten a great deal over the last week. It was rough Monday- Tuesday and Wednesday.  Thursday I ate only protien no real carbs. And, I have been on no carbs since. I have lost like 8 pound so, maybe more. I will be fine with my broth dinner, but I will not be thrilled with my bowel prep.  I imagine that the Mag-cit is going to be foul and not any fun at all!
I have recieved a ton of support from the ladies on the Ky board and I am very thankful for that. I think that Steve will post for me shortly after I get to recovery.
Well, I should hop off and make some coffee for Mary and Al coming over soon to visit with me and Mom.
Tomorrow is the beginning of the rest of my life. I think I am ready for this journey. I do expect that somewhere along the way I will have some curve balls, but that is to be expected.  That being said: here is to a new me, a new day and getting healthy!!!
thanks for listening
teach

   Well, I am supposed to be getting ready and yet I am still getting over this intestinal virus.  AND those two do not go together. I had all intentions of coming home from school and cleaning...instead, I worked and came home and boom, off to sleep!
   Two hours later I got up and made Hunter and Steve some soup.  But then it was my turn....but, what to eat for me?? I was told NO CARBS and how do I do that with something that does not hurt my tummy. I ended up eating chicken broth and scrambled eggs.  But, I miss veggies so I am going to look for carbs on them. I know they have some, but I miss them.  I may make some chicken broth with the carrots, onions, and celery. 

   Emotionally it is a good time for me. I am not feeling greatly stressed out. I am not feeling worried or apprehensive, but rather exicted with leftover upset stomach.  I think much as I hate to admit it I maybe should have taken yesterday off with Steve and Hunter (steve said I should.)  I need to get my bag packed and keep up with the liver shrinking (skipping the carbs) and wait my turn.  I am also excited that Mom is coming out to be here. I guess I still need to talk to Dad. 

   Sooo, now it is time for me to clean. 
                         take care one and all-- teach

woo hoo!
I went to all my testing today.
I had to be there at 8.  Not happening.  Let's just say I was late.  We got there, Steve went to rest in the parking garage and i went in about 35 minutes late.
   The nice lady at registration got me into all my tests before the 1100 class. I did not follow the order people normally do, but I got all the appointments in and now I am OFFICIALLY just waiting for the day.
   It was all fine, I am supposed to take my thyroid meds the morning of surgery with the smallest amount of water. OK. It will feel good to take my pills. 
   I took lots of notes, but I knew much of this already.   What I did not know was that the doc would let me off clear liquids before I came home. Huh?  Pretty cool, huh?
  I should bring pajama bottoms but do not worry about the tops. I pretty much guessed that.
  I will be wearing pressure stockings for the time I am there.
  I will have a nasal tube and possibly a breathing tube if needed. Ewe, but I just don't want to fell that thing in my mouth.


WEll, write ya soon
teach

Hi everyone!  Or is that Hi One??
Well, anyway. To anyone that might be reading the utterances of a cluttered mind welcome.
   I have my surgery two weeks from today. In some ways it seems that the date took forever in arriving and at other times it seems as if it came quickly.
  I believe it was Vicki on the KY board who steadied my keel when I got a bit frustrated with the pulmonary hoops I had to jump through.  She reminded me, and rightfully so; that the more tests and proceedures ahead of time the better off I would be come the date of surgery. She was correct and it was indeed my frustration of having to wait. I will always remember that advice as I move forward.
  I am glad to be moving foward and I am a bit nervous too. I have what I percieve as similar anxieties to others as the big day approaches. I am worried about the physical surgery, about not loosing weight, choosing a reachable goal, staying motivated, eating the correct foods at a correct pace...... I think that if I was not worried about the surgery and all of my "what if's" I would be either dead or irresponsible.  
  Only a small part of me worries about the possiblity of not making it through the surgery. I really do not think that is a huge possiblity. I believe that Dr. Shina's preop requirements really do cut down the probablities of many of the complications. I also beleive that I cannot control everything and because of that I needed to find a surgeon I trust. I do trust Dr. Shina and know that he will do what he can for me. 
   My biggest fear in worring about not coming out of this is leaving that beautiful young man I call son. He is the apple of my eye.  I love him as much as any parent has ever loved a child. I know my husband would grieve badly- as I know he loves me- but I also know he is a grown up and can find the means to take care of himself. I never, never, never want him to feel that I abandoned him.  IF something were to happen I want him to know that I did this to be more able to keep up with him & to be a better example to him of how to live and eat. BUT more than that I need for him to know that I love him more.... That is a "thing" between he and I. 
  Wo-I guess I DO need to write those just in case letters.  I did not realize the need in my heart until I wrote about my son.
   I have thought alot about what I might look like when I loose weight. I know in my heart that I am almost as big as I have ever been. But, what will I look like in a pair of jeans? I want to look like an average human being. I do not expect to be a super model, but I DO want to look good. I remember once when I lost a good portion of weight before I walked by a window at a stip mall going into a video store and quite literally did not recognize myself. I am hoping having had this experience already I will be more able to wrap my head around a new physical me.  I am not sure though.
   Jenny; who I work; with has been such and inspiration and a voice of experience thru this process since she joined our staff last summer. I am moving forward and she is excited for me.  How neet is that? I found out that a former co-worker had it done too. She has lost 112 pounds and is doing well. She had gained quite a bit of weight and it was really hard for her. She had something happen hormonally and it flicked a switch and she could not keep the weight off. She is now a size 10 and probably not done loosing. Tanya the first person I know to have had the surgery  has done very well. She is keeping all her weight off. I believe she bounced up 5 pounds but not too much and nothing out of the ordinary. I hope I can be like those ladies in my life and make a substantial change for the postive.
   I need to re-read my surgeon's paperwork and get all the directions for the upcoming set of tests on the 19th.  I know I need to eat low carbs and high protien, so I am trying hard to forgo sweets and breads and eat my protien first.... the last 3 days before surgery I will be on a liquid diet.  I know that the laxitive will be awful, but such is life.
   Two weeks from today I will be awake in a recovery room or my hosptial room.  I will be on the loosers bench as they say. I will be on the road to a new me. 
    If I think of any other random ramblings I will post again. Otherwise see you all when I am on the loosers bench!!
teach

Next time I see many of those that love me they will see a much smaller me; my brother john and his wife and my dad, family & friends in CA.

When summer comes and it is time to wear shorts mine will be smaller.

All my cute winter sweaters will be large on me by christmas.

I will probably need a new winter coat.

A half a banana will be a treat.

I will be able to shop in regular stores before the year is over.

Those were my wonderful thoughts.
I am getting so excited. I have some concerns, but I think I would have to be dead if I did not.
I would like to have my feet go back to my adult size, not my plus size. 

I will be posting on the boards the question what do I need at the hospital beside comfortable clothes and chapstik?

Hubby is getting excited for me too. 

I have not decided IF I want to write letters to the ones I love incase... It seems so morbid. But, on the other hand it seems like a good idea in case something happens to me. Will journal if I do.

So, those are my thoughts for today.

Teach

I finally have a date!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It hardly seems possible.
I have moved forward and back at least 4 times in the last month and a half. Oh, my heavens and did I get frustrated.  One call came with bad news and I just did not deal with it for a week. We sent your packet.  Only to get a call a week later, no we need more medical history. I said what do you mean?  Got the info from her and tired to move to get the info they needed.  I got another call.  I did call back immediately, and I was told that I had to do the diet for 6 months. Well, I said to the lady on the phone, no I do not. She got a bit frustrated and said, "yes, you do we told you that last February." To which I said I will call you back with the name of the lady I spoke to at Tricare and when she told me.
I then called the office and spoke to the lady at the same office who previously had given me the name and number of the lady at TriCare. I got the info again and called I called TriCare back and then the 2nd lady at the doc's office. She said ok well, then we will submit.
Two days later the phone rings while I am in school. It was the doctor's office but I was teaching. I did not answer it until I got home. Guess what????? It was Holli and she was calling to schedule my surgery....
Whoooo Hooo!
So, now I am scheduled. I have surgery on the 30 of March...26 days away.  I told my mother and she is coming out to help out. I told her about the decision to tell daddy later. She said she would do it if I wanted her to do so.  I thought that was incredibly generous of her. I am waiting so it is easier for me. That sounds selfish, but he is not found of medicine and cannot imagine he will be any happier about this.
I have told my boss and she is ok.  Apparently the principal has decided he might take the first week of Spring Break for the the make-up time.  I do not know how many families will be here. Some are already planning vacation. I told my boss that I had scheduled it during break so I would not have to miss school and she was like no problem. I do not want to make it any more uncomfortable for people I work with, but I know I should take two weeks off. I will be resting and trying to get my strength back.
Dear Hubby is really excited for me. He has had many a health issue, but is glad I am going to do something for me.  He is supportive and I am thankful.  The day I got the call we were running around and he was feeling lousy.  We sat down for a moment and he said, "Congratulations,I know you have been working for this."  That ment the world to me.  
 
Wooohooo
I am having surgery!!! I am having surgery!!! I am having surgery on March 30th..the first day of break.
thanks for reading and here is to Spring Break and my surgery
teach


So here is to 25 more days.  Hmm, though I am not looking forward to the last few days. Ugh, clear liquids will be rough. At least I have family here to support me.