Well here we are Old Girl...
Mar 30, 2009Sittin' on The Losers Bench!
Today I weighed myself and imagine my shock when the scale read 159.5. This is surreal. When my surgeon first told me that because I was 5'8 I should weigh 160 lbs, my initial reaction was "Are you kidding?!" In my mind there was no possible way, surgery be damned that I could ever weigh that much...or little, however you want to look at it. It was like he placed a can of aquanet, some chewing gum, and tube of lipstick in my hands and said, "build me a time machine!". It was NOT possible. I weighed 289 lbs! How could he think I could do this?
Obviously he had more faith in me at that moment, than I did in myself. I think if anything I've learned from this is that there is absolutely NOTHING I can't do. I feel so free. For years I didn't even realize what a prison I'd been in. Chained and bounded to this life that was not meant for me by my weight. I feel so liberated, free, and happy. I feel like for once the true "Angel" can be herself without fear of reprisals in the form of jabs and insults at my body. I can speak my mind, I can order in a restaurant, I can walk into any clothing store, I can buy a bathing suit, I can sit anywhere I want, I can go to the movies, I can ride roller coasters. I CAN DO ANYTHING. What people take for granted day in and day out, was just a day dream to me before. All I've ever wanted, was to be normal. Today, that wish in all it's entirety, has finally come true.
Thank you. Thank you God. Thank you Dr. Bobby and staff. Thank you Marsha Yousef and Support group family. Thank you OH family. Thank you crappy insurance company that FINALLY gave me this shot at a new life. Thank you husband. Thank you Mom and Dad. Thank you little brother. Thank you WHOLE family. Thank you friends. Thank you co-workers. You all believed in me, when I couldn't. You all picked me up, when I couldn't. You all loved me, when I couldn't.
Bless You All <3
May 09, 2008